Dateline London:

Barbie, beware. The iconic plastic doll is often mutilated at the hands of young girls, according to research published Monday by British academics. “The girls we spoke to see Barbie torture as a legitimate play activity, and see the torture as a ‘cool’ activity,” said Agnes Nairn, one of the University of Bath researchers. “The types of mutilation are varied and creative, and range from removing the hair to decapitation, burning, breaking and even microwaving.”

Researchers from the university’s marketing and psychology departments questioned 100 children about their attitudes to a range of products as part of a study on branding. They found Barbie provoked the strongest reaction, with youngsters reporting “rejection, hatred and violence,” Nairn said.

“The meaning of ‘Barbie’ went beyond an expressed antipathy; actual physical violence and torture towards the doll was repeatedly reported, quite gleefully, across age, school and gender,” she said.

While boys often expressed nostalgia and affection toward Action Man _ the British equivalent of GI Joe _ renouncing Barbie appeared to be a rite of passage for many girls, Nairn said.

“The most readily expressed reason for rejecting Barbie was that she was babyish, and girls saw her as representing their younger childhood out of which they felt they had now grown,” she said.

Geez. My five-year-old daughter popped the heads off a couple of her Barbies. Not because she was rejecting a symbol of childhood. But because, well, it was more fun than braiding their hair.

Some of these researchers have way too much time on their hands. Next thing you know, Amnesty International’s gonna get involved.