BDS rant of the day: “Impeachment? No. Impalement!”

By Michelle Malkin  •  November 9, 2007 12:24 PM

Update: A reader notes that this rant is from last year. It’s getting passed around post-Kucinich impeachment stunt…

Wow.

Now, that was unhinged. And despite the satire and comic label, you get the sense he probably believes almost every heaving word of it published in “The Progressive.” You know his readership does.

Maybe John Edwards will hire Will Durst as his new blogger.

See what others have said

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Comments

  1. #1
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:30 pm, TexasTiger said:

    See what happens when the professional writers strike and the amateurs take over.

  2. #2
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:31 pm, Ragspierre said:

    “Progressive”????

    Progressing to ever deeper and deeper lunacy perhaps….

  3. #3
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:32 pm, jsr said:

    Pretty mild. Sounds like the liberals are toning down their rheteoric.

  4. #4
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:33 pm, 30 pcs of silver said:

    Liberals.Gone.Wild.

  5. #5
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:33 pm, Your Brother John said:

    I can’t wait to hear their reaction when Bush nears the end of his term and refuses to give up power. Except that those unbelievers will be sent to gulags so we won’t have to hear them! Mwah ha ha ha!

  6. #6
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:33 pm, TexasTiger said:

    Durst should lay off the jenkem for a while.

  7. #7
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:35 pm, Eclectic said:

    So how many thesauruses did he go through to find all of those adjectives? What a waste of time. And to top it off, it was still poorly written!

  8. #8
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:36 pm, BlameAmericaLast said:

    Well, what do you expect from a pot-smokin’, Birkenstock wearin, Che lovin’, communist hugging, non-educated, clueless, hypocrite, history-oblivious, ACLU card carrying, moronic, gun hating, hate-spewing, Christian-hating, tax-hike and trial lawyer loving, NY Times-reading, theory as fact believing, 60’s throwback, anti-war left wing loon?

  9. #9
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:40 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    Don’t Phase me Bro…

  10. #10
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:40 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    or did I mean,

    Don’t Phrase Me Bro?

    :)

  11. #11
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:41 pm, bigviking0001 said:

    Whatever happened to the Chenny/Bush bumper stickers so we can really get em going….

  12. #12
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:41 pm, See-Dubya said:

    I do hope you’re writing Unhinged 2: Liberal Bugaboos.

  13. #13
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:42 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    My favorite:

    xylophonic

    Wow - I haven’t been called that for awhile. I thought I was - maybe - marimbic…

  14. #14
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:44 pm, willie peter said:

    “smarty pants”

    Oooh. That one stung!

  15. #15
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:47 pm, bloghooligan said:

    they’re so peaceful and non-aggressive.

    the irony never dawns on them.

  16. #16
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:47 pm, ajmontana said:

    Why did he leave out Turd Burpers?

  17. #17
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:48 pm, Offhanded said:

    …….Was he lookin’ into a mirror when he said,……all that?………(he should have been)

  18. #18
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:48 pm, swj719AWG said:

    Damn… I actually had to bust out the dictionary on a couple…

    I just don’t understand how we are “xylophone-like”…

  19. #19
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:48 pm, RetFireman said:

    Nothing like another has-been comic spouting off about nothing.

    Why is it, that the Liberals’ main spokesmen all seem to be has-been comedians? Airhead America is repleat with them, O’Donnell, Durst, Goldberg, Behar, etc…

    And why would anyone want to take political or military or diplomatic advice from anyone of that nature and treat it as something more than just a weak attempt at comedy?

    No wonder it is so hard to take any of them seriously.

  20. #20
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:49 pm, jsr said:

    How could he forget child hating?

  21. #21
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:50 pm, swj719AWG said:

    puppy-kicking…

    He left out puppy-kicking…

  22. #22
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:53 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    Why is it, that the Liberals’ main spokesmen all seem to be has-been comedians?

    Or Never-weres. I’ve never heard of this guy, and after reading it, I know why.

    Marimbic, not xylophonic - it’s more “south of the border”-ish.

    And Oedipal - “Mommie, he called me Oedipal!”

  23. #23
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:55 pm, See-Dubya said:

    xylophone-like…because we get played, yo!

  24. #24
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:56 pm, jsr said:

    #19

    I think puppy kicking is covered under puppy stomping

  25. #25
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:57 pm, pizzo3 said:

    Will, one word: Thorazine

    High dosage too.

  26. #26
    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:59 pm, Dave from Flint said:

    I’m glad the writers are on strike so he could tell us what he really thinks.

  27. #27
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:00 pm, DanGrantTx said:

    As we say in the medical profession, “Someone didn’t take his Lithium this morning.”

  28. #28
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:00 pm, ArmoredCAV said:

    So much I could have done rather than read that tripe. Please, can I have those five minutes back?

  29. #29
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:02 pm, englishqueen01 said:

    Why is it, that the Liberals’ main spokesmen all seem to be has-been comedians? Airhead America is repleat with them, O’Donnell, Durst, Goldberg, Behar, etc…

    Because those comics and the liberals who idolize them have one thing in common:

    Neither group hs a sense of humor.

    But they all do seem to share a nearly erotic sense of hatred for our President and our country.

    Birds of a feather, I guess.

  30. #30
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:05 pm, MTNEER said:

    That was almost as bad as listening to that utterly inane “Name Game” song from the 1960’s.

  31. #31
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:06 pm, blues said:

    I didn’t realize until the end that he was talking about Republicans,I thought he was talking about Hillary.It makes sense that way.

  32. #32
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:07 pm, sfcmac said:

    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:33 pm, TexasTiger said:
    Durst should lay off the jenkem for a while.

    OUCH! LOL.

  33. #33
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:07 pm, SHoward said:

    Let’s give this poor guy some credit. He’s probably been working on that post since January 2001.

  34. #34
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:08 pm, blues said:

    I’ve never heard of Will Durst before-is he somebody?

  35. #35
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:09 pm, metalhead said:

    How come Google still links to this hate speech? Hmmmmm?

  36. #36
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:10 pm, docflash said:

    I didnt see nose picking or fart lighters on this list so it became irrelavant to me.

  37. #37
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:10 pm, MTNEER said:

    Wow, talk about transferrence! I couldn’t find one of those epithets that couldn’t be applied to at least one liberal. Well, maybe not the Cindy Sheehan bashing.

  38. #38
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:11 pm, On-my-soap-box said:

    LOL

    I thought that was chap talking about me again.

  39. #39
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:13 pm, MTNEER said:

    BTW just who is this guy? I never heard of him before today…..and I hope I never do again.

  40. #40
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:15 pm, tre said:

    I have been dis-satisfied with George Bush in many ways. However, after reading this I just about wish he would win a third term. Some of these liberals might actually have a meltdown. Who knows, they might even have a China Syndrome meltdown!

  41. #41
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:19 pm, EHeavenlyGads said:

    He seems to be market-testing his concept for a Code Pink self-help Word-A-Day calendar.

  42. #42
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:24 pm, teresafromtejas said:

    Maybe we should make a list of the nuttiest liberal blog posts like the liberals did with conservatives. We add this to the list.

  43. #43
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:25 pm, uhangtight said:

    a man obviously impressed with his wordiness. immature is the first word that comes to mind when reading his diatribe. something from middle school, i would imagine. yep, they say smokin’ pot keeps you from emotionally maturing.

    and people read this guy?

  44. #44
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:25 pm, meatpieandtatters said:

    In the absence of reason and intelligence the bleating phalanx of liberal media prattles on.

  45. #45
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:27 pm, See-Dubya said:

    MTNEER: I believe he is the founder of Limp Bizkit.

    No, wait, that’s a different Durst.

  46. #46
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:29 pm, On-my-soap-box said:

    god and flag waving

    You Che worshiping, communistic, socialist loving, turd lapping, truther loving, code pink diaper changing…

    I got it started. Feel free to add!

  47. #47
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:30 pm, KaosKlerik said:

    MTNEER (#35) Wow, talk about transferrence! I couldn’t find one of those epithets that couldn’t be applied to at least one liberal. Well, maybe not the Cindy Sheehan bashing.

    Wait until she starts running against Pelosi :)

  48. #48
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:31 pm, On-my-soap-box said:

    P.S. That is for Durst BTW

  49. #49
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:33 pm, Just A Grunt said:

    puppy stomping,

    Okay I could have let all the other stuff slide but that was mean. I need a hug now.
    /sarc just to be sure

  50. #50
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:35 pm, Tennessee Dave said:

    As Mark Twain said, “it is better to be thought of a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.”
    Well, there’s no doubt what this moron is. He has removed all doubt.

  51. #51
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:37 pm, 30 pcs of silver said:

    #46:
    tax and spend, it’s for the children, dessicated, prescient-deficient, it’s for a good cause, tree-hugging, sit-in having, America-bashing, godless…

  52. #52
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:39 pm, Boomer said:

    This guy needs to go back to the remedial Creative Writing web-based course he graduated from to ask for his money back. If this is what the left considers to be civil discourse and intellectually stimulating material no wonder they have trouble digesting facts over their feelings.

  53. #53
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:43 pm, stonemeister said:

    He left out “cuddly”.

  54. #54
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:52 pm, swj719AWG said:

    He left out “cuddly”.

    You making a crack about my weight? :)

  55. #55
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:54 pm, On-my-soap-box said:

    swj719AWG

    Puppy-kicking!

    I LOL so hard I think I hurt myself.

  56. #56
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:58 pm, Uplander said:

    I noticed it wasn’t open for comments. It probably felt good screaming all that at rubber walls.

  57. #57
    On November 9th, 2007 at 1:59 pm, MTNEER said:

    #45 See-dubya: If he durst enter my encampment,I’ll impale him on a limp biskit fresh from the oven!!

    P.S. I sometimes over bake them

  58. #58
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:04 pm, jegjr said:

    WHATEVER! Geez, how long can these people keep it up?

  59. #59
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:07 pm, max said:

    On November 9th, 2007 at 12:33 pm, TexasTiger said:
    Durst should lay off the jenkem for a while.

    yeah that would explain why he’s always got that sh**t eating grin on his face.
    ;)

  60. #60
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:21 pm, tre said:

    He forgot to call George a flatulating butthead or a stinky poopyhead.

  61. #61
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:31 pm, calamityville said:

    I wonder how he feels about terrorists. Freedom fighters. Peace loving. Potential voters. Misunderstood. Cheerful. Friendly. Tolerant…..

  62. #62
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:32 pm, WarTip said:

    The first time I read it I thought it was comedy. Then I realize that the people there read it regularly. Then I realized they actually do believe what they read there. This is the future they want to give us?

    Be scared, be very scared!

  63. #63
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:33 pm, navywife91 said:

    It’s nice to be able to come here after reading that stupid “letter”. You guys make me laugh which keeps me from being really angry about this immature idiot.

  64. #64
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:37 pm, EWTHeckman said:

    Did anyone else notice the Obama/Clinton cover to their magazine? I thought its style seemed awfully familiar.

  65. #65
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:38 pm, gippergirl said:

    awwwww…did somebody forget to self-medicate???…

  66. #66
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:53 pm, twoninerkilo said:

    Ouch! Do you guys know where they’re going to stick that curtain rod when they impale us?

  67. #67
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:57 pm, jedijson said:

    I don’t know about you guys, but I am so sick and tired of these lying, thieving, holier-than-thou, rightwing leftwing, cruel, crude, rude, gauche, coarse, crass, cocky, corrupt,

    There. Fixed.

    And since he didn’t capitalize God when he said “god and flag waving,” I’m assuming he meant Allah.

  68. #68
    On November 9th, 2007 at 2:59 pm, DesertLover said:

    I would have to ask this guy the same thing I always used to ask my kids when they were being completely unreasonable with the world …

    Who p’d in your Fruit Loops this morning?

  69. #69
    On November 9th, 2007 at 3:26 pm, RetFireman said:

    I think his editor told him that his articles needed to be a certain number of words long. Since he really doesn’t ever have anything worthwhile to say, if anything at all, he did the high school thing.

    “I had a really, really, reallly good time. We went very very very….”

  70. #70
    On November 9th, 2007 at 3:33 pm, Yashmak said:

    I just checked with the grammar bank.

    They’re fresh out of commas.

  71. #71
    On November 9th, 2007 at 4:03 pm, PeterX said:

    Please give to the End Thesaurus Abuse Fund by sending a red-colored pen and a copy of “Daily Paragraph Editing, Grade 5″ to:
    Will Durst
    c/o “The Progressive”
    409 East Main Street
    Madison, WI 53703

    Thank you, and God Bless.

  72. #72
    On November 9th, 2007 at 4:06 pm, Prime Director said:

    Birkenstock wearin, Che lovin’, communist hugging, non-educated, clueless, hypocrite, history-oblivious, ACLU card carrying, moronic, gun hating, hate-spewing, Christian-hating, tax-hike and trial lawyer loving, NY Times-reading, theory as fact believing, 60’s throwback, anti-war left wing

    leg dragging, pants pissing, wealth redistributing, affirmative acting, eschaton immanentizing,…

  73. #73
    On November 9th, 2007 at 4:39 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    “…meanwhile, in the Vice-President’s office, Dick Cheney has broken out his xylophone, and launched into a stirring rendition of the theme from ‘Star Wars’.”

    Doing his best Darth Vader imitation he huskily breathes out those dreaded words, “Rex, she’s your Mother.”

  74. #74
    On November 9th, 2007 at 5:26 pm, lonewolf said:

    Has anyone asked or answered the question, who the Hell is Will Durst?

  75. #75
    On November 9th, 2007 at 5:31 pm, PeterX said:

    Has anyone asked or answered the question, who the Hell is Will Durst?

    He’s a self-described political humorist who got his start in San Francisco’s comedy club scene and on various local Bay Area radio programs back in the early to late ’80’s.

  76. #76
    On November 9th, 2007 at 5:48 pm, BlameAmericaLast said:

    Has anyone asked or answered the question, who the Hell is Will Durst?

    Wow…I’m from CA, and I’ve never heard of this guy.

  77. #77
    On November 9th, 2007 at 5:59 pm, TXRose said:

    Thanks for the fun!! I needed it today!

  78. #78
    On November 9th, 2007 at 10:22 pm, vickisoup said:

    puppy-kicking…

    He left out puppy-kicking…

    ROTFL! :)
    I agree…that one did me in!
    This is was the most fun I’ve had reading MM’s blog in a long time; you guys are great.

  79. #79
    On November 10th, 2007 at 12:42 am, JohnHolliday said:

    …hurricane disregarding, judge packing…

    Gee, Will. Did you forget your lithium today?

    “Hurricane disregarding?” Exactly what part of the Blanco/Nagin fiasco don’t you understand, Will?

    “Judge packing?” Will, please tell me how many of the President’s nominations for US justices have gone uncontested by the wack-a-doodle liberals? Oh, that’s right! None! And don’t forget Will, that it was a socialist dictator named Franklin Delano Roosevelt that tried to pack the Supreme Court! Oh, my! Did you forget that so soon?

    Now, Will, swallow the pills in the little cup, take a sip of water and lie back. Dennis K is piloting the mothership over you right now. Time to beam up!

  80. #80
    On November 12th, 2007 at 4:27 am, Armylifer said:

    This is the rant of a highly underdeveloped and self-absorbed mind. I’ve met his type before - I call them preschoolers. No, wait. I apologize to the preschoolers for sullying them like that.

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