Spot the spoof

By Michelle Malkin  •  November 14, 2007 08:49 PM

Spitzer plus Hillary plus open-borders plus campaign season equals comedy gold. Let’s play spot the spoof (make a guess before you click on a letter):

A) “I support Governor Spitzer’s decision today to withdraw his proposal,” Clinton said in a statement. “As president, I will not support driver’s licenses for undocumented people and will press for comprehensive immigration reform that deals with all of the issues around illegal immigration including border security and fixing our broken system.”

B) Democrat presidential candidate Sen. Hillary Clinton today said she supports New York Gov. Elliot Spitzer’s decision to drop his plan to issue driver’s licenses to illegal aliens as vigorously as she had backed his effort to issue such licenses in the first place…“I didn’t say he shouldn’t do it, nor that he should,” said Sen. Clinton, “I only said I recognize that whatever he does I can understand because George Bush makes us all do irrational things.”

***
For some reason, I am reminded of one of my family’s favorite scenes from Shrek 3–Pinnochio’s interrogation. Always makes us crack up:

***

Ed Morrissey: People laughed at John Kerry for saying, “I was for the $87 billion before I was against it.” He looks like the Rock of Gibraltar next to Hillary Clinton.

Obama campaign: “When it takes two weeks and six different positions to answer one question on immigration, it’s easier to understand why the Clinton campaign would rather plant their questions than answer them,” Obama spokesman Bill Burton said in a statement issued late Wednesday.

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Comments


  1. #1
    On November 14th, 2007 at 8:57 pm, ajmontana said:

    Holy Carp! It sounds just like her! hahahahhahahah :lol:

  2. #2
    On November 14th, 2007 at 8:58 pm, puhiawa said:

    LOL. Not a word from the MSM about her lunacy. Pure cover.

  3. #3
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:01 pm, trinitytim said:

    I suspect Hils campaign made a phone call and pressured Ole Spit to drop the plan because she couldn’t worm her way out of her incompatible situation.

  4. #4
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:02 pm, JarvisW said:

    “When it takes two weeks and six different positions to answer one question on immigration, it’s easier to understand why the Clinton campaign would rather plant their questions than answer them,” said Barack Obama spokesman Bill Burton…”

    Thats GOLD! haha

  5. #5
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:02 pm, brooklyn red said:

    Flip-flopping did in the last Dem contender… surely this will be a campaign ad for whoever run against her, assuming she doesn’t crash & burn in the primaries.

    As a New Yorker, I am LOVING this.

  6. #6
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:03 pm, Grey Fox said:

    Okay, that was funny.

  7. #7
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:05 pm, navywife91 said:

    That’s perfect, Michelle! We Love Shrek!
    Maybe Pinochio has worked with the Clintons or their staffers because he does sound an awful lot like Hillary describing her “position” (or lack there of) on an issue. :) Darn prep book!

  8. #8
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:14 pm, Thomas said:

    Nice.

  9. #9
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:20 pm, TXRose said:

    Again I say..HC called Spitzer and in the
    words of Queen Victoria, told him how she felt about
    his actions causing her to flipflop on the drivers licenses issue ending with QV’s famous, “We are not
    amused!” This obviously left Spitzer and his mandate
    quaking in his boots. (If she could so callously dump
    Socks, just think what she could do to Spitzer?)

  10. #10
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:23 pm, Michelle Malkin said:

    Thanks for your comments, but please turn off the bold font. It’s not necessary.

  11. #11
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:36 pm, JammieWearingFool said:

    You suppose Wolf Blitzer will bring up this painfully obvious flip-flop tomorrow?

    This is so weak.

  12. #12
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:39 pm, drfredc said:

    Well isn’t that just clear as mud.

    But then for everyone who gets it, there’s a bazillion well trained ignoramouses sucking this slop up who will vote at least once for Hillary.

  13. #13
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:41 pm, navywife91 said:

    I’m not holding my breath for Wolf to ask too many hard questions.

  14. #14
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:44 pm, ajmontana said:

    “and fixing our broken system”
    does that mean enforcing current Laws?
    or is it,
    Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah???
    Please, do tell…..

  15. #15
    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:58 pm, feebiebabe said:

    $10 bucks, her stance will be 180 degrees oppisite come mid December. She can’t make a decision without checking poll numbers first….

    “Tell me Gallup, what am I saying today?”

  16. #16
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:03 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    The Hillary Campaign Version:
    Quick tell a lie!
    Hillary: What should I say?
    Donkey: Say something crazy… like you’re wearing men’s underwear.
    Hillary: Um, ok. I’m wearing men’s underwear.
    Hillary: [silence]
    Barack: Are you?
    Hillary: I most certainly am not.
    Hillary: [nose extends] .
    Donkey: It looks like you most certainly am are.
    Hillary: I am not.
    Hillary: [nose extends]
    Edwards: What Kind?
    Kucinich: IT’S A MAN-THONG!

  17. #17
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:04 pm, gridlock said:

    Pinocchio’s voice is not quite as shrill and grating as Hillary!‘s in this clip.

  18. #18
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:11 pm, brooklyn red said:

    feebiebabe, I will take your 10 at even.

    She will stick with her position A. because it is to well documented to(crap)weasel out of & B. because the polls clearly show it is what people want.

    Spitzer, however is toast- but he is enough of a punk to turn on her… let’s see.

  19. #19
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:13 pm, meatpieandtatters said:

    Obama has some stones to be calling our Hillary on her various positions. He himself is a rather slippery one when it comes to defining his position…of course, unless it’s about increasing taxes and spending more money on all the democrat’ pet projects.

  20. #20
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:33 pm, zorro said:

    Funny clip.

    She just does not double speak as well as her slug of a husband.

  21. #21
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:36 pm, MissMarciLyn said:

    She doesn’t do anything as well as her husband, and I can’t even describe how much it galls me to admit that Bill Clinton does anything well…..except for maybe interns :lol:

  22. #22
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:43 pm, englishqueen01 said:

    “When it takes two weeks and six different positions to answer one question on immigration, it’s easier to understand why the Clinton campaign would rather plant their questions than answer them,” Obama spokesman Bill Burton said in a statement issued late Wednesday.

    And that, ladies and gentleman, as a good old fashioned BURN.

  23. #23
    On November 14th, 2007 at 10:59 pm, RetFireman said:

    Of course everyone realizes why Hillary actually wants Illegals to get licenses. It is obviously so they would vote for her. How do I know that?

    Because everyone knows that they are here only to do things that regular Americans won’t or wouldn’t do.

    Baddum bum.

  24. #24
    On November 14th, 2007 at 11:02 pm, feebiebabe said:

    RetFireman – you funny!

  25. #25
    On November 14th, 2007 at 11:37 pm, Gull said:

    “When it takes two weeks and six different positions to answer one question on immigration, it’s easier to understand why the Clinton campaign would rather plant their questions than answer them,” Obama spokesman Bill Burton said in a statement issued late Wednesday.

    This has to be the quote of the campaign season. I’m gonna put it in my sidebar — heck, I’d tattoo it on my body if it didn’t have the words “Clinton” and “Obama” in it!

  26. #26
    On November 14th, 2007 at 11:50 pm, JConrad999 said:

    So can we call Hillary the “Flip Flop Queen” now?

  27. #27
    On November 15th, 2007 at 3:17 am, fred5676 said:

    On November 14th, 2007 at 11:50 pm, JConrad999 said:
    So can we call Hillary the “Flip Flop Queen” now?

    I suggest “weathervane”.

    After all, she just swung in the wind, following Spitzer’s changing

  28. #28
    On November 15th, 2007 at 3:25 am, fred5676 said:

    I suggest “weathervane”.

    After all, she just swung in the wind, following Spitzer’s changing

    Darn – it’s late and I missed the preview button.

    After all, she just swung in the breeze, following Spitzer’s wind.

    And to shop for her Christmas present…

  29. #29
    On November 15th, 2007 at 3:32 am, briarhopper said:

    LOL at the comments. Either you all are really funny, or 3:30 AM is way too late (early?) for me to be awake.

    RE: the movie clip. That had to be inspired by B.C’s (Bill Clinton! What did YOU think BC stood for?!) Anyway, had to be inspired by Bill Clinton’s example through the years.

  30. #30
    On November 15th, 2007 at 8:31 am, jrlingreenbay said:

    Puss-in-Boots as Hillary’s campaign make-up artist:

    ” Hey Boss – Let’s shave her! “

  31. #31
    On November 15th, 2007 at 8:33 am, ajmontana said:

    there’s not enough “bondo” in the world to make her look good.

  32. #32
    On November 15th, 2007 at 8:49 am, Beaker1214 said:

    “I didn’t say he shouldn’t do it, nor that he should,” said Sen. Clinton, “I only said I recognize that whatever he does I can understand because George Bush makes us all do irrational things.” –WHAT?
    Does she listen to herself? A campaign manager has to let her know that these kinds of statements sound looney.

  33. #33
    On November 15th, 2007 at 8:52 am, jrlingreenbay said:

    Some quotes from the ‘Shrek’ trilogy, keenly adapted to the topic…..

    Hillary: I’m not a puppet. I’m a real girl.
    [nose grows]
    Captain of Guards: Five schillings for the possessed toy. Take it away.

    [while looking at John Edwards' huge castle]
    Shrek: Do you think he’s maybe compensating for something?

    Hillary: Politicians are like onions.
    Donkey: They stink?
    Hillary: Yes. No.
    Donkey: Oh, they make you cry.
    Hillary: No.
    Donkey: Oh, you leave em out in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin’ little white hairs.
    Hillary: NO. Layers. Onions have layers. Politicians have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers.
    [sighs]
    Donkey: Oh, you both have layers. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions.

    Bill: So where is this fire-breathin’ pain in the neck, anyway?
    Shrek: In a news conference, waiting for us to rescue her.
    Bill: I was talkin’ about the dragon, Shrek.

  34. #34
    On November 15th, 2007 at 9:15 am, Milwaukee Mike said:

    “…George Bush makes us all do irrational things.”

    At least she recognizes she has BDS.

  35. #35
    On November 15th, 2007 at 9:26 am, EdDantes said:

    I can’t take anymore of this BDS BS. Even if Hillary gets elected, when something goes wrong in her administration she is going to blame it on President Bush.

    Someone needs to take a serious shot at her propensity to blame others for her shortcomings, mistakes, and the mistakes made by her supposed colleagues.

    No wonder their’s no accountability in the US anymore, the “leader” of the Democratic party can’t even take responsibility for what she says!

  36. #36
    On November 15th, 2007 at 9:35 am, flmom said:

    Hilarious analogy Michelle, this should definitely be a part of the Republican campaign if she’s the Dem nominee.

  37. #37
    On November 15th, 2007 at 9:52 am, Tennessee Dave said:

    If elected, I hope Shillary never has to make a split-second decision. Mushroom clouds would be sprouting all over the country and a week later she’d still be debating whether to shoot the incoming missles out of the sky with the missle defence system she cancelled procurement of when she took office.

    If she is elected, I’m still trying to figure out a way to make it through without having raise my hand and swear to follow her orders. I did it with her first man.

  38. #38
    On November 15th, 2007 at 10:10 am, walterc said:

    My wife mentioned to me this morning that she heard on Fox & Friends that Spitzer cancelled the program after getting pressure from the Clinton campaign.

    Any truth to that Michelle? I was in the shower so I missed it.

  39. #39
    On November 15th, 2007 at 10:17 am, Mister P said:

    I think Hillary reminds me of Shrek himself.

  40. #40
    On November 15th, 2007 at 10:20 am, Yakfisher said:

    “…George Bush makes us all do irrational things.”

    Sigh. Is there anything that is not W’s fault?

  41. #41
    On November 15th, 2007 at 11:15 am, DBNinKY said:

    The saddest thing is, the MSM is already labeling her the “Come-back Kid,” (just read J. Klein’s prop-piece article in Time or the NYT daily campaign advice disguised as a so-story) even before tonight’s unwatchable dim-debate ever airs.

  42. #42
    On November 15th, 2007 at 11:18 am, Bicyea said:

    OH NO not the gum-drop buttons!!!

  43. #43
    On November 15th, 2007 at 11:53 am, Boomer said:

    The wife and I were comparing the Shrek III interrogation to “she-who-must-not-be-named” while we were watching it too. The sad thing is we no longer have children at home, but continue to buy Pixar movies. We really do enjoy them compared to most of the drivel coming out of Hollyweird these days.

  44. #44
    On November 15th, 2007 at 12:01 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    AJ, #31, not “bondo” – Faux-Tox…
    :)

  45. #45
    On November 15th, 2007 at 12:35 pm, 29Victor said:

    From now on all presidential debates should be held on the Bridge of Death over the Gorge of Eternal Peril.

    Yes…
    I mean no…
    Um, no, I mean yes…
    Nooooooooooooooooooooo

  46. #46
    On November 15th, 2007 at 12:59 pm, Barry F. said:

    On November 14th, 2007 at 9:36 pm, JammieWearingFool said:

    You suppose Wolf Blitzer will bring up this painfully obvious flip-flop tomorrow?

    I wouldn’t hold my breath for Blitzer to ask any hard questions for Hillary. One of her staff probably “has a connection” with some of his folks and will get a few softies thrown her way.

    Oooops! Did I say that? ;-)

  47. #47
    On November 15th, 2007 at 1:21 pm, mom2jack said:

    While I have already grown weary of B. Obama and his annoying whiny wife, I must say his Hillary zingers are quite entertaining.

  48. #48
    On November 15th, 2007 at 1:25 pm, jrlingreenbay said:

    On November 15th, 2007 at 12:35 pm, 29Victor said:
    From now on all presidential debates should be held on the Bridge of Death over the Gorge of Eternal Peril.

    Wolf Blitzer: What is your Name?

    Hillary: Hillary Clinton

    Wolf Blitzer: What is your quest?

    Hillary: To become President of the United States

    Wolf Blitzer: What is your favorite color?

    Hillary: Blue….No, I mean Green….

    (Sprooiiiiing!) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

    HAH! Love that movie….

  49. #49
    On November 15th, 2007 at 2:11 pm, 29Victor said:

    Barry F. #46

    I wouldn’t hold my breath for Blitzer to ask any hard questions for Hillary.

    I think you underestimate Mr. Blitzer’s ability to jump on whatever bandwagon happens to be rolling past at the moment, and busting on Hillary is hot this week.

  50. #50
    On November 15th, 2007 at 4:11 pm, BrianNY said:

    I would love it if someone followed up and checked out that nauseating question posed at the second debate of the 1992 Presidential Election cycle. The one where some clown, who was hand picked by Carol Simpson of ABC, asked:

    AUDIENCE QUESTION: Forgive the notes here but I’m shy on camera. The focus of my work as a domestic mediator is meeting the needs of the children that I work with, by way of their parents, and not the wants of their parents. And I ask the three of you, how can we, as symbolically the children of the future president, expect the two of you, the three of you to meet our needs, the needs in housing and in crime and you name it.

    Bill Clinton couldn’t jump up fast enough to answer and agree with this ridiculous question and its sentiment. It fit right into his “it takes a village” and “I feel your pain” crap.

    Doesn’t this question, which was read from a piece of paper, sound just as planted as the “global warming” question in Iowa last week?

  51. #51
    On November 15th, 2007 at 8:13 pm, 29Victor said:

    BrianNY #50

    Bill Clinton can’t take any chances. For all he knew, he could have been that guy’s dad.

  52. #52
    On November 16th, 2007 at 12:17 am, BrianNY said:

    29victor #51

    Ouch!

  53. #53
    On November 16th, 2007 at 4:12 am, BrianNY said:

    #50, Me, said:

    Doesn’t this question, which was read from a piece of paper, sound just as planted as the “global warming” question in Iowa last week?

    Now, Ali, over at Dan Riehl’s blog, informs us about another liberal “paper reader” making Hillary’s point during Q+A at tonight’s Dem. debate.

    What an overt setup. Did you catch the Vegas working woman who somehow got lost in the question re: baby boomers? They cut away and you could hear the chick literally whispering the lines to her. Oh Lord, please let someone post the whole thing on youtube, wizbang, google vid, somewhere.

    Are these instances as blatant as they appear?!

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