The suicide of Emma Beck and Silence No More
My column this week reflects on the death of young British artist Emma Beck and her unborn twins.
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The suicide of Emma Beck and Silence No More
Copyright 2008 Creators Syndicate
She didn’t have to die. And neither did her unborn children. Over the weekend, London newspapers reported on the 2007 suicide of 30-year-old Emma Beck, a young British artist who hanged herself after the abortion of her twin babies. Perhaps the retelling of her suffering can prevent more needless deaths.
The agony and loneliness in Emma Beck’s suicide note resonate across the pond, across racial and class lines, across generations. She was distraught over a breakup with her boyfriend, who didn’t want the children. She was suffering intense grief from her decision to end the lives inside her. And so she ended her own.
“I should never have had an abortion. I see now I would have been a good mum,” Beck wrote. “I told everyone I didn’t want to do it, even at the hospital. I was frightened, now it is too late. I died when my babies died. I want to be with my babies — they need me, no one else does.”
Beck’s family blames the medical establishment. The judicial system, as is so often the case, has become a coping mechanism. A British court recently held a hearing on Beck’s suicide. Beck’s mother revealed that her daughter “was not given the opportunity to see a counselor.”
When a professional “counselor” can’t be found, isn’t that what mothers are for?
But it’s not just jaded abortion providers and medical assistants, AWOL counselors and MIA parents who need to look in the mirror. We have tolerated a culture of callousness and nurtured an entitlement to convenience for decades. Feminists shush women with post-abortion regrets. Population control zealots and Planned Parenthood drum it into the heads of young women around the world: “The fewer, the merrier” and “Why carry more burdens?” their T-shirts and bumper stickers proclaim.
Last fall, in Emma Beck’s homeland, the British press went gaga over an environmental nitwit who had an abortion and got her tubes tied to “protect the planet.” She told the London Daily Mail: “Every person who is born uses more food, more water, more land, more fossil fuels, more trees and produces more rubbish, more pollution, more greenhouse gases, and adds to the problem of over-population.”
That came on the heels of a British think tank report on how children are bad for the environment. Said John Guillebaud, emeritus professor of family planning at University College London: “The effect on the planet of having one child less is an order of magnitude greater than all these other things we might do, such as switching off lights. The greatest thing anyone in Britain could do to help the future of the planet would be to have one less child.”
And who gets premium op-ed space in America’s newspaper of record to talk about abortion? Idiots like University of Iowa adjunct assistant writing professor Brian Goedde, who shared his festive thoughts surrounding the New Year’s Eve before his girlfriend’s abortion in an essay a few months ago in The New York Times. “The abortion is scheduled for two days from now, and we’re holing up,” he reminisced. “We do the dishes brush our teeth, climb into bed and have unprotected sex. ‘I’m not going to get more pregnant,’ Emily says. I’ve never felt pleasure more guiltily.”
What you rarely hear are the voices telling you that such self-indulgence is wrong. What you rarely read are the stories of untold women (and men) around the world who know the vaunted choice they made was wrong and need help. What you rarely see are the studies showing that with abortion come lifelong costs and consequences — high levels of post-traumatic stress disorder, depression, grief, ostracism, guilt and, in at least one study in Finland, higher suicide rates.
Delivering that message here in the United States are preventive groups like the National Institute of Family and Life Advocates (nifla.org), which donates ultrasound equipment and training to open up a “window to the womb” for women in crisis pregnancies, and post-abortion healing organizations like Silent No More (silentnomoreawareness.org). To combat abortion glorifiers, the Silent No More Awareness campaign makes the public aware that abortion is emotionally, physically and spiritually harmful to women and others; reaches out to women who are hurting from an abortion and lets them know help is available; and invites women to join us in speaking the truth about abortion’s negative consequences.
What Emma Beck most needed to hear is the message abortion pushers most desperately want to drown out: You are not alone.
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Trackbacks
- Life of the Party
- Emma Beck RIP (age 31) | BitsBlog
- Triple tragedy — Misinformed consent « Nunoftheabove
- Perverse, and boasting about it : Brigitte Pellerin Online
- Liberty Pundit
- Triple tragedy — Misinformed consent | NunoftheAbove
Please forgive her, God. Have mercy on her.
Wow, thats probably the most insane thing that I have ever heard.
I don’t really think that they are trying to drown it out as much as they are preaching “You are completely alone” to many young and cared teenagers out there.
Great column this week Michelle.
And May God Rest their Souls and comfort her family.
Boy, Brits are such dupes for Islam. Guess who keeps having 12 children while British nitwits are having “one less child?” The once great England deserves to be a Muslim country.
an individual instance of a cultural phenomenon as western civ continues to commit suicide.
may her soul rest with God and may ours be saved before it’s too late.
Excellent column Michelle.
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What amazes me is that most people believe there are no ill-effects to having an abortion. I work in the pharmaceutical industry on the clinical side which conducts clinical research studies and patients have to sign an informed consent form that outlines every conceivable risk and side effect. Everything from swelling around the site of injection to Steven Johnson Syndrome. Yet, the risks associated with getting an abortion are continually downplayed. There are risks and side effects to almost every medical procedure yet as far as those in the abortion industry are concerned there are no ill-effects to the mother. They’ll have us believe that the woman just skips through life undaunted by her decision to end the life of her unborn child. Tell that to EMMA!
It is clear to me that the work that countless pregnancy centers do is invaluable and immeasurable.
My husband and I support an organization (Care-Net) that reaches out to young mothers and every month I look forward to reading the testimonies of women who chose life. Sadly, not enough women we hear the message before it is too late. I pray that woman everywhere get the benefit of learning from Emma’s circumstance. Perhaps her death will not be in vain.
Having a very good friend touched by abortion, it saddens me to hear about Emma. My friend Catie once told me that her life “stopped” when she had her abortion and she’s never felt the joy and happiness she did prior to that day, which seems to be ingrained in her memory. Like me she also has a disabled child but wonders if her daughter is “punishment” for her abortion. I try to tell her that it is not so, as I have a child with the same disability and I don’t believe that God’s plan was to punish her for her what she did. She’s been in and out of counseling for years but has yet to tell her husband. She had a boyfriend she told it to and he said he could never love or respect her and they parted. Since then she made the decision never to tell. I try to tell her that she should go to one of those Project Rachel retreats but that would mean telling her husband. I don’t know, I worked with another girl who also had an abortion and even though her and the guy eventually got married and have since had two other children, it always appears that Amiee is also under a dark cloud at many times.
I believe that those who say they’re “proud of their abortion” are deluding themselves. If you have a conscience or a soul, even if you believe you’re “pro-choice”, I would think it would come back to haunt you in someway. I choose not to call those who think abortion is fantastic “pro-choice” but instead “pro-death”. They automatically become offended but I do not care. They are here, they were born, millions weren’t. They can call that a “straw man” argument but the fact is they were born. You know I saw something on one of those Dateline type shows about a girl who died on a cruise ship and they were trying to say the boyfriend poisoned her or something because he was taking methodone (I believe) and the girl took it and died. The mother of the girl said that she had had an abortion about a month or two prior and that while she was depressed over her decision she knew if she wanted to be a model/actress she had to get rid of it and that both thought it was a “great idea”. I don’t know whatever happend to the case but thought the mother was pretty callous aobut it. Perhaps her daughter also killed herself but didn’t bother with a note?
No, Emma you are not alone. I know that many women suffer from the same grief and I pray God has mercy on you, which I’m sure he will.
GOD rest their souls.
More proof that abortion kills over 50% of participants.
Long ago, when I was quite selfish and didn’t care enough about others, my then fiance’, with much regret, decided to abort our “accidental” child early in the first trimester. The incident simply didn’t faze me much, other than being a bit bummed out because she was so sad….and that it cost me $250. Obviously, we broke up very soon after that. It was at least 5 years afterward, that what happened finally dawned on my pea-sized brain.
I was, and still am, absolutely ashamed of myself.
Debbie and I are still good friends, and even gets along well with Chrissy, my wife of 23 years. But I will never forgive myself for what I did, not only to the child, but to Debbie too.
Abortion doesn’t just affect the Mother, who must undergo tremendous psychological hurdles, but many of us buffoons who only think with our “little heads” far too often.
When Chrissy became pregnant with Sarah, you can believe I was a 100% changed man. Nothing was too good or far-fetched during her pregnancy. In fact, more than a few times she demanded I leave her alone and quit doting so much….yeah, like I’m gonna listen to a hormonally raging Mother to be
Sarah is now 21, in college, has a great job, and is living on her own near the beach (oh yeah, I’m jealous of her house location!!).
…And I thank God every day that I finally grew up too.
God Bless, and comfort you Emma.
Great column, Michelle.
I say a prayer for Ms. Beck and all
But remember folks - feminists always say, “Abortion does not hurt women.”
It is a tragedy that can be avoided. It goes beyond politics and religion (there are pro-life athesists out there); it is a matter of dignity for women and children.
I always think - when I hear horrible stories of child abuse or the death of young children because of abuse - that the attitude inherent to abortion (that an unborn child isn’t “human” and “just a clump of cells”) has begun to infect the way people see infants and young children (as “inhuman” and “burdens”).
I will never understand why, or how, embracing a procedure that denies the very nature of being a woman (pregnancy and childbirth) is an affirmation of one’s femininity. If attaining “equality” means sacrificing a child on the altar of “choice”, I want none of it.
48 million abortions since 1973. How many men and women suffer because of abortion?
And why do those groups that claim to care about “women’s health” - NARAL, Planned Parenthood, etc. - scurry into the tall grass when the issue of post-abortion trauma show up?
as a breast cancer survivor i have found that abortions are now linked to this disease as well. during the pre-testing they have questionnaires to fill out; and during this process i found out that you are more at risk of breast cancer if you have had an abortion.
i do believe that the rise in breast cancer among those my age (boomers) is due to the abortion freedom started in the 70’s. they dont’ like to mention this while you are at the ‘free clinic’ or the various abortion clinics, either.
i am so sorry for this young woman and the young babies she lost through the societal pressure of ‘abortions are good and necessary’. what a tragedy for her family. yes, there are times even when a person is so distraught after the abortion that a ‘mother’s counsel is not enough. there needs to be a support group of abortion survivors to assist you in your dispair.
There are - Project Rachel and After Abortion are just two of them. And they are well-tapped resources. A clear indication abortion traumatizes more women than abortion supporters care to think about.
By the way - correction to my post above - the second sentence should read:
No, they did’nt and it sad they did because of Godless morons.
This is criminal, she stated she did’nt want to do it and apparently was counciled in to it. God spoke to her but other forces won. God rest her soul and forgive her, she could’nt forgive herself.
Her own mother needs to take some responsibility for her demise.
Exactly.
Moron, maybe this idiot should go off himself to save the planet.
I never talk about this…
When I was a stupid college kid, despite the fact that I knew with ever fiber of my being that it was wrong, I allowed my boyfriend to push me into getting an abortion. I can tell you from the inside that those clinics make no effort to offer other options, and a bawling 18-year-old girl will still be sent in for the “procedure.” And the anguish afterward was unbearable. I still suffer from bouts of depression over it. I am now married to a wonderful man and I am scared of having children… I feel like I don’t deserve them.
Feminists can push the “positive aspects” of abortion all they want. It doesn’t change the inherent nature of what it truly is, murder. And there is guilt that comes with that. Going in I spoke with another girl who was all empowered, talking about her body and her rights. When I saw her after, she was crying. I can’t know why for sure, but I have a good guess. Liberals think changing rhetoric can change the nature of sin… it can’t. Call it whatever you want, that act has left me scarred for life.
It’s not just teenagers and single women that hear this message. My husband and I have 3 kids and we had a miscarriage in between number 2 & 3. None of those four pregnancies were “planned” in that we never at any one point said okay, this is it, let’s have a baby.
And there were actually family and friends who were shocked and dismayed every time and made comments like “not again” and “don’t you know how to prevent that?”
Am I supposed to be trying to prevent it?
I’m married and I thought that meant I didn’t have to consider myself “knocked up” if I was pregnant. What kind of scarlet letter would be appropriate here? I’m not on welfare and food stamps. I’m not in poor health. I’m not going to be a drain on the tax base, so why would anyone see it as a negative?
Are we such control-freaks that we can’t deal with anyone letting nature take it’s course? Or with anyone not doing things exactly the way we would do them?
If the anti-baby crowd and eco-nuts don’t want kids, fine, you’re probably doing the next generation a favor. But butt the hell out of my business, and if you can’t tell me congratulations when I’m pregnant, don’t say anything at all.
I’m sorry Ms. Beck felt that she made the wrong choice. What a terrible situation. I actually saw this on FoxNews a few days ago and it deeply saddened me. Abortion is obviously something you can’t take back, so if you choose to get one, you really have to reflect and be sure.
I don’t want to overload this thread like I did with the DC voting post or anything. I absolutely respect those who oppose abortion and this thread is much too serious for my usual shenanigans. That being said:
as a breast cancer survivor i have found that abortions are now linked to this disease as well. during the pre-testing they have questionnaires to fill out; and during this process i found out that you are more at risk of breast cancer if you have had an abortion.
uhangtight, and I don’t mean to say you’re being untruthful. Just that you were misinformed.
Am I wrong to think of them as hostages instead of participants?
If Brandon Kramer’s parents had listened to the doctor’s advice, he would not be be around. A more positive story in that it shows the errors of abortion, but how sad that doctors push parents to kill their unborn children.
“The best thing we can do to protect the planet is to have one less child.” What if that “one less (or should it be fewer) child” would have grown up to become an environmentalist, or a scientist who would have discovered a breakthrough in clean energy? What if that one child had grown up to discover a new way to reduce or eliminate garbage, pollution, or other waste? How would we know unless we had given that “one less” a chance at life? We won’t, because the world is too caught up bowing to the god of convenience and child sacrifice.
vsatt:
I’ve known families with 3 or 4 kids who’ve had child services called when mom became pregnant with #4 or #5. One was told by the neighbor who called that she couldn’t possibly “handle” all those kids, and that neglect has to be taking place.
Children are seen by many as accessories - as “things” to be created and destroyed as is convenient or molded to fit into one’s lifestyle (rather than altering one’s lifestyle). I remember, after the Duggar family of Arkansas had child #16, many feminists on a message board called her a “dog” who needed to be spayed. I left the board soon after that, when I defended her right to choose…to have many children.
I’ve also been pretty frank with my decision to practice NFP because of my faith. Others - for reasons ranging from faith to health - do the same. We women who choose not to use The Pill or other forms of artificial birth control are harrassed, belittled, and attacked for our choice.
I’m reading Unprotected by Anonymous M.D. It tackles issues of political correctness in Anonymous’ profession (counselor). In one of the chapters, a woman who was married and wanted to have another child (her sixth) needed a medication to assist with ovulation. She was told by a clinic she couldn’t get an appointment for two months…meaning she’d have to wait another six months before getting pregnant. So she called the clinic back, told them she wanted birth control and had an appointment within the next hour. At the clinic, the doctor didn’t want to give her the medication and told her, “You don’t need help ovulating, you need birth control.” Only after the woman lied and said she wanted to have a baby before going to law school was she given the medication.
So clearly, the euphamism of “choice” now means “Do what we want you to do. Or else.”
The mentality behind abortion is that nothing can or should interfere with one’s own desires. It is those who foster that mentality - and not the mothers - who are to blame.
Many times, abortion proponents claim that pro-lifers would want mothers thrown in jail for having an abortion. No. I want the doctors (like Kansas’ George Tiller) and the clinic workers who perform abortions thrown in jail.
JW2: Thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry to hear that you still suffer from your abortion. My prayers are with you.
How utterly sad I am for Emma Beck. As a woman in her 30’s who would like to have children, I feel this issue quite keenly. I am utterly appalled at what Michelle has called a “convenience society,” that doesn’t want to be bothered with children. No wonder our children don’t feel important, why self-esteem is more important than actual life lessons in school, and why militant feminism has hijacked women’s lives for the worse not the better.
I too will say a prayer for Ms. Beck and hope she’s in a better place.
Michelle, you have written another wonderful column. As soon as I started reading it, I e-mailed the link to my wife, because I know she will like it too.
My wife and I work to support the Tennessee Right to Life here in our state. I get many a strange looks from people, because of the license plate I have on the front of my vehicle.
Although it is very depressing to read the article, it is awfully informative and insightful. As noted, there is very little time given to the pro-life side in the MSM. Please keep up the good work. Innocent children and future grieving abortion recipients need to know that they “are not alone.”
Here here for NFP! No environmentalist will talk about the fact that estrogen in the water is making boy fish lay eggs! http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,329966,00.html
What is it doing to your family? It is not filtered out of the drinking water! Wouldn’t it be funny if this world’s contraceptive mentality did more to endanger the earth than any children do.
I would like to note that children in large families are more likely to conserve out of necessity. Moms of many kids are going to look at cloth diapering, hand me downs, used clothing and other environmentally friendly options to make ends meet.
Okay off my soap box now.
God will forgive you, he knows you where young and did’nt have the power of discernment at the time, you deserve to have children, he loves you, he wants you to be happy and children will magnify your joy and happiness in this world, I believe that you now know how precious life is and will be blessed with as many children as you would like. I pray for God to heal your soul and give you the children you obviously want, I’m sure you will make a great mother. This is your second chance God took the babies soul and is waiting for you to reclaim it.
She called them babies. So did the women on this thread who had abortions (my heart goes out to you).
Interesting - no?
I am with Blind_Mule. Have your children and those thoughts will be put to rest forever.
Sincerely,
Proud Grand-dude Soap
So sad. Such a tragic waste.
Serial murder by global peer pressure.
JW2, this is exactly how the environmentalists and those that believe in zero population growth want you to feel. Here’s proof -
Mark Steyn said, “In those terms, surely the greatest thing everyone in Britain could do to help the future of the planet would be to reduce his carbon footprint to zero by killing himself.”
God, these people are idiots.
JW2, have children. Please! Don’t give into the wackadoodle socialists. This way, you can tell your children how wrong your abortion decision was and how right you were to have children.
Soap,
You haven’t heard of having a fetus shower?
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I completely agree with everyone here JW2, God determines what we can and cannot handle. If he blesses your life with a kid chalk it up to a second chance. Every last one of us has made mistakes that we aren’t proud or cannot forgive ourselves for. Let go and let God.
Yep - I don’t think I’ll ever have to buy another article of boy’s clothing because of all the clothes my son has. Plus the hardware items - car seats, strollers, crib, changing table, toys. 99% of it can be recycle. And cloth diapers - they are more cost-effective in the long run, so I’m going that route.
Large families do save money - they buy second-hand, in bulk, etc. - and are more “eco-friendly” than families with one or two kids who have disposable income to use on new purchases.
Rusty - I do believe there are many studies that contradict the findings of the National Cancer Institute. From a purely logical point, pregnancy requires a tremendous influx of hormones. If a pregnancy ends in miscarriage, the body prepares itself hormonally. Abortion is a shock to that system, which could lead to problems. It interrups what is a natural, biological process.
And there are other health problems. Scarring of the uterine wall, damage to the cervix, and other problems cause future miscarriages or fertility problems. The risk of hemorrhage or infection after abortion, etc. can lead to death (and has).
By and large, however, the biggest impact is emotional. Ms. Beck is not the first and she will not be the last to commit suicide because of abortion.
63% of abortions are for “social reasons” and about that same amount are done after the woman is coerced by family, friends, boyfriend/spouse, or society into having an abortion.
Which clearly doesn’t gel with the notion of “women’s choice.”
I’m willing to wager that only a small minority of women who’ve had abortions feel absolutely no emotional trauma from it. Likewise, only a small percentage (about 5-7%) of abortions are actually due to the mothers’ health or in cases of rape/incest.
Which would make the notion of “safe, legal, and rare” abortions true - if only those 7% actually had abortions. But since 1973, 48 million abortions mean that 60% (or 28.8 million) were done for “social reasons”.
That is appalling and - like I said above - the resources like Silent No More, Project Rachel and After Abortion are used readily by hundreds of thousands of men and women who suffer from abortion and its after effects.
If any other medical “procedure” resulted in that much heartache and trauma, it wouldn’t be legal.
Why abortion?
Fabulous column Michelle, its too bad you will never receive the awards you are due.
Michelle…..
Thanks so much for yet another wonderful insightful column. When I read your work I often wonder why the MSM doesn’t do stories like this. Oh, I know they do PC stuff, are liberals and have an adgenda, but don’t they realize they would increase viewership if they did “good” stories?
I feel priviliged to be a member of the MM community. Thank all of you who shared your stories.
As I wipe my tears, I’m saying a prayer for all of you……….and Emma.
Women have all the choice in the world about how many children they want to bring into the world. That choice comes prior to conception. I am sickened by the tree hugger in Britain. She should have made the decision to tie her tubes before she had to commit murder to prevent reproduction.
At least these poor innocent lives that are snuffed out so early go straight to live with God and don’t have to experience the pain of this world. Bless poor Emma. I hope her story saves many lives.
Very good article Michelle! I followed this story over the weekend and found it very sad this poor woman was in so much pain that she felt it necessary to take her own life. I am glad to say that both in my family and my wife’s family we have always chose life even in cases of unplanned pregnancies. I can’t imagine the pain or guilt a woman can suffer after finally waking up to the fact she has been duped into murdering their unborn child. A genocide worse than any every seen on planet earth began as soon as Western civilization allowed the legal abortion of unborn children.
When I first heard about this story, I wondered how come not a single soul told this poor woman, “It’s okay, you don’t have to do this. We’ll help you with those babies.” Thanks, culture of death.
I’m reminded of the pro-life bumper stickers that say, “Abortion: 1 Dead, 1 Wounded.” The abortion industry doesn’t want people to think about the women haunted by abortion, often for the rest of their lives. Or about the men who either realize what they’ve been complicit to or had no say in the matter at all. If they acknowledge it at all, they blow it off as “hormones” or they blame pro-lifers for making them feel ashamed. Really? I have a theory that many of the hardcore pro-abort activists who have had abortions are masking their guilt and remorse through their activism, spending their lives justifying what they know deep down was wrong.
Well, this will no longer be between my best friend and God and me… I was 18 and scared and broke and stupid. I had an abortion and now, at the age of 40 have only just (I hate to use this phrase) come to terms with what I did. I’ve only just accepted the fact that I sinned and that God has forgiven me for that sin…I still have trouble accepting that forgivness.
I murdered my child. I will always wonder if i’d have had a boy or a girl. I will always wonder what he or she would have grown up to be like. I will always wonder how different my life would be now if I’d had the courage to have my baby.
God has blessed me with two wonderful daughters, a blessing that I feel like I don’t deserve. Who am I to question His ways, though?
That’s all I can say now. I’m at work and in danger of breaking down. I will pray for the souls of Emma and her babies as well as for those she left behind.
Oh man.
OK, my turn to chime in.
I have mentioned before on this site being an aetheist. I see in this thread’s comments many ppl invoking God. that’s fine, its thier belief.
I just want to bring things down to earth:
Why should we pity this woman? SHE made the decision to have an abortion. SHE made the decision to kill yourself. NO ONE is to blame except herself. She was 30 yrs old for goodnees sake! If she can’t make her own decisions by 30 then she has no one to blame but herself.
Am I being indignant? Maybe, but so what? Depending on how you look at it, this 30 yr old woman murdered 3 ppl. She could be said to be a murderer. Why should I pity her?
I understand she may have been presured, denied counseling, etc. so what? She is 30 yrs old. People pressure me constantly to vote Democrat, do this, do that, and if someone pressured me to murder 3 ppl I’d probably say, NO.
God et al. aside, why is she the victim? Many people believe God will forgive her, maybe thats true. Personally I see a tragedy commited by a very naive 30 yr old.
kill yourself = kill herself. sorry
Pulchritudinous Patriot,
May God make you strong in the belief that you are worthy of his forgiveness and blessings. Just know that God doesn’t make mistakes.
God bless you.
Patriot expressed my problem in #37 - I know that God has forgiven me, but accepting a forgiveness that I don’t deserve is very difficult.
Thank you everyone for your kind words. This is the first time I have talked about this to anyone but my husband and God. I am overwhelmed by the response here. Thank you so much to all who offer their prayers.
JW2, I almost think I’m talking to my friend Catie when I read your post. She felt she didn’t deserve children either, they adopted like we did as like me she wasn’t able to have anymore. She says she doesn’t deserve her children either, that is not true. You both deserve your children and I hope that one day you and your husband are blessed.
Greenfaire, right on about the hardcore activists. That’s exactly how I feel.
As for Rusty, well of course he just wants everyone to know “the truth” because you’re always right and we’re wrong. Not in this case buddy but perhaps one day you’ll wake up and smell the coffee. This comment says it all:
We don’t want any info to mess up your pro death ways now do we? I believe you’re misinformed as usual and of course you’re always right in your mind. However, as in so many other things, you’re wrong on this on. When I had a breast biopsy you better believe this was one of the first things they asked me as well. I can asure you Rusty there is more to this cancer connection than you or your little pro-death friends want to admit.
zeroangel - you appear to miss the point entirely. Yes she is an adult who committed a terrible act (which should be a crime.) But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t deserve our pity and prayers. For her to be in such a state that she would kill her unborn children and then herself is certainly a sad situation that warrants pity at least.
Additionally, there is a clear, definite societal influence here. Once she made her tentative decision she expressed fears and concerns. Why don’t those who provide abortions at least offer information on other options? It’s not just that people think abortion is okay, they seem to think it is desirable. Plus, “Pro-choice” advocates never discuss the serious emotional trauma we face after going through this. Yes, it was my decision as an adult (legally at least) to get an abortion, but should it have been so easy for me to access? Shouldn’t my concerns have lead the clinic to offer me other options?
When you read her suicide note, you learn that this woman regretted her decision to abort/kill her children for reasons that in hindsight didn’t measure up. In that you can feel pity and sorrow on her.
Perhaps you should look at this from a big picture perspective. The abortion industry by and large charge that women can make the decision to abort their children and all will be well - Emma’s case clearly highlights that this isn’t the case. Emma made the choice to take her own life and as you have read, there are many women who have chosen to abort their babies. So, there is a certain amount of compassion that comes into play when you consider why this woman took her own life. Age has absolutely nothing to do with it.
We weep for Emma because she is yet another woman who has fallen prey to the belief that just because it is your body that you will feel no guilt or remorse.
JW2:
Correct me if I misread, but you were 18. There is a HUGE difference between 18 and 30.
To flip to another issue, I might not feel so terrible about someone stealing my tax dollars to give a leg up to a wayward 18 yr old. A wayward 30 yr old is a different story. Being “legally” an adult doesn’t make one an adult.
Without getting too deep into my personnel feelings on abortion, I don’t think you or this lady have anything to feel bad about. However, I am de-facto pro-life as I always vote Republican. That said, to me, the fact that this person felt so guilty she HAD to kill herself is even more of a tragedy. However, its the kind of tragedy where I feel bad for her family for having to deal with the grief this lady inflicted on them.
30 pcs of silver:
I get it, I do. I just disagree. Maybe I am taking the whole personal resposibility thing a bit too far in the eyes of some of you. But I dont think so.
Why on the one hand do we (as conservatives), shame the person that says, “Oh! Woe is me! I can’t get a break because the big bad corporations are keeping me down and holding me back!” But on the other hand pity the person that says, “Oh! Woe is me! The big bad government and abortion industry didn’t give me all the facts and now I killed my babies! I have nothing left but to KILL MYSELF (?!?!)”
Personally, I think I’d spend ALOT of time researching and thinking about a decision that involves my body, and sharp, pointy things.
JW2:
Oh sorry missed your questions:
Hmmm, yes you may have a point, but I really couldn’t say because I don’t know what it was like however many yrs ago for you, and I don’t really know the situation today.
I get what you are all saying. She SHOULD have had better info, and because she (a naive 30 yr old) didn’t have it, she did something she didn’t want to do (HUH ?). Then she felt so bad about doing something she didn’t want, she killed herself (HUH, again?) No one put a gun to this ladies head (except her).
Tragedy, yes? Main culprit: wishy-washy 30 yr old that probably had serious emotional issues from the start.
My heart breaks for this poor woman and her unborn children. Such an avoidable tragedy.
I am so fortunate to never have encountered/caused the “Youthful Indiscretion” where I most likely would have done the wrong thing.
My wife and I just had our first child one year ago this saturday and our daughter is due in less than three weeks : )
My cup runneth over and I have never known such joy and wonder. If money were no object we would have a tribe. As it is we will probably stop at 4 : )
I think every person contemplating an abortion should be required to spend at least a week with a new born. Help out at a hospital natal unit or something.
In a perfect world there would be no abortions. I wish we could outlaw all second and third trimester abortions and allow only first trimester AFTER the mom to be has spent at least a week with new born (s) and received full counseling on adoption.
zeroangel,
I agree but this woman is no longer here and to me, simply looking at her situation from a standpoint of - oh well, you made your bed now lie in it, belittles the point of what many pro-lifers here argue on a constant basis - that abortions kill… And it’s not just the babies. I look at Emma’s life as it were and think this could have been avoided. Yes, she chose to have an abortion and yes she chose to end her own life. This tragedy could have been averted. That’s where my compassion emanates from.
That is exactly what a clear thinking person would and should do; however, I do not think she was provided the opportunity to do so. Whether she robbed herself of the opportunity to reflect on her decision or someone else robbed her of it tells a great deal about her state of mind and callousness with which these people in the abortion industry treat their patients.
Ultimately, what she did is between her and God. But my wish is for other women out there to know is that they have options. You’d be surprised by the sheer number of people out there who simply don’t know that they have options and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Have you never been in any situation that caused you to react and then later you regretted that action?
Zeroangel, I’m just speaking for myself here but I see where you’re coming from as well. I guess the difference is at least for me, we have these NARAL types and Planned Parenthood, and all telling us we have control over our bodies and it’s just a clump of cells, etc. I guess a lot of people buy into this. My friend Catie was actually my Company Commander when I was in the Army many years ago. I remember when another girl in our unit had an abortion and Catie was yapping on and on about it being her choice and not hurting anyone etc. and this poor 19 y/o nearly having a breakdown (she actually got pregnant again right away and left the Army). I think Catie thought this was okay and she said she felt it was fine until it was over and she went into this other room and couldn’t look at anyone and noticed a very nervous group of women. She said it hit her then but thought it was something she’d get over. She hasn’t and it’s been a long time ago. She said she always was “pro-choice” until she made that “choice” and just felt empty. I would think she would have done a lot of research and all too but I don’t know how clearly you’re thinking when this is all going on.
As for the woe is me the man is keeping me down, they’re lazy in my opinion and are always the victims. I don’t think these women are trying to be victims, I think they understood that the ramifications of an abortion was not what was promised them by the liberal folks.
Of course, in fact I’ll admitt that on occasion I still beat myself up over many things from my past. Some things from Iraq still keep me up at night.
But I didn’t kill myself over it! I pity her family, not her. Suicide is probably one of the most selfish decisions that a person can make.
Abortions don’t kill, people do, in this case, a 30 yr old woman.
That all said, I am not nessecerily disagreeing here. People should be informed as much as possible about any medical procedure. However, let’s put aside the abortions and just consider this lady: she could not cope with the decision to end the life of her unborn twins, what makes any of you think she could cope with being a mother?
I just feel compelled to chime in based on the comments by zeroangel and the responses.
After hearing from a number of post-abortion women and others who speak on this subject, the thing I come away with is it appears the abortion industry is ever trying to conceal these harmful after-effects.
Zeroangel states Ms. Beck may have been emotionally unstable to begin with. Maybe so, but I would bet my paycheck against a dime that if you ask the counsellors provided by abortionists what the negative consequences may be they will state that there are no emotional side-effects.
Effectively, Ms. Beck may very well have been deceived. So if she was emotionally unhealthy to begin with, the abortionists may bear some culpability for her death.
I just want to clear something up. No matter how young I was, I fully understand that the decision was mine. I know I mentioned the callousness and lack of information at the clinic and the fact that I very much felt pushed into it by my boyfriend - but none of that was meant to imply that it was not my stupid decision. It was. (I know that no one here claimed I wasn’t taking responsibility, I just want to clarify.)
The fact is that I knew that it was morally wrong, but I bought into the societal idea that it is acceptable and harmless because it is private and happens all the time. But the wonts of society cannot change what is moral or not.
18 or 30, when you’re frightened and feel alone, it’s easy to make a very stupid decision. The decision was my fault, but I can’t see how my age made the effect of the outside influences any more valid or understandable.
My decision was based entirely in fear and selfishness. If I had really understood that there was another option available to me, I hope that I would have changed my mind.
Emma may have been naïve, but I can certainly understand what may have driven her to have an abortion and society doesn’t make it any easier for a woman to say no to that option. Also, although suicide is incomprehensible to me, I can understand the overwhelming grief and shame she must have felt which led her to that choice.
zeroangel:
It may have been her choice, but the system that works so rabidly to give her that choice failed her. Repeatedly.
Someone - at the clinic, specifically - should have seen her distress and acted. They didn’t. They pushed her through the system and broke her.
NARAL and Planned Parenthood and their advocates vocally oppose giving women any accurate information regarding fetal development prior to an abortion. And they all oppose ultrasound/sonogram technology (especially the newer, 3-D and 4-D sonograms) because at least 75% of women who have an ultrasound choose not to have the abortion. They call it “emotional manipulation.”
But they manipulate emotions by telling women to deny their emotions, to deny their femininity and to deny their child’s humanity. They treat women like Ms. Beck (who have abortions and suffer afterward) as damaging to their “cause” and have an attitude of “Just suck it up and deal because you’re heartache shouldn’t interfere with my ‘right to choose’.” They tell women their lives will be over if they have a baby, that they won’t have any fun ever again, that babies are a burden, etc.
Rare is the woman who has an abortion and doesn’t feel something afterward.
Yet it’s pushed on them as the “noble” and “progressive” option. The New York Times has run - in the past year or so - two columns decrying the absence of abortion in films (like “Waitress”, “Knocked Up”, and “Juno”).
They fail to realize that most Americans favor some restriction on abortion (usually everything except for the life of the mother and/or rape and incest) and that, with abortion, there is no story. It would not be believable for a character to have an abortion and go on with her life as if she simply had her hair done.
But the Culture of Death continues to steamroll any and all who dare question or oppose its most “holy” sacrament…
You should come to a Wal Mart down here sometime.
Its not just Brits…
Comprende?
Just think about that question for a moment. You can ask that to any one of the women here who have had abortions and now have children whether they are fit mothers. Besides, her death was a result of her decision to end the lives of her children. Had she not aborted her children we wouldn’t be discussing this…
Now, I know that you are fully aware that there are other options. The fact that she may not have been able to care for her twins clearly does not make ending their lives the only alternative!
Ahh, there is a good point, I had not considered that fully. Still, it ultimately comes down to personal responsibility once again. If I tell an emotionally distraught person to jump off a bridge and they do, am I culpable? Yes, I suppose, to a point. However, the vast overwhelming fault lies with the individual.
Is this not a bit silly:
Person A: “Am I going to feel bad about doing something which I feel bad about?”
Person B: “Oh no! Of course not, have a lollipop!”
Person A: “Oh gee! That’s a relief, now let’s get out those knives.”
…days later…
Person A: “Oh I feel bad! goodbye cruel world!”
Should Person B be a bit more honest? Probably. Is Person A an emotional wreck that would have likely self-destructed at some point in her life? Yes, and then we might have seomthing else to blame.
I’ll bet you if she killed her kids AFTER they were born and then killed herself, a lot less ppl here would pity her.
JW2 / 30 pcs:
You guys misunderstood what I was saying here:
I wasn’t saying that ppl that have abortions make unfit mothers and I wasn’t saying that it was good she got an abortion because she would make a horrible mother.
I was just making the point that she was an emotional wreck and its POSSIBLE that she would have killed herself later in life because she can’t deal with changing diapers.
Thats all and nothing more.
Because people can do awesome things out of love for their children. And that’s clearly what Ms. Beck felt she had betrayed - nay, lost - because of her abortion.
Parenthood isn’t easy. But nothing worth having is, now, is it?
It takes a lot of patience and time and sacrifice.
I couldn’t imagine the pain I’d feel if I lost my son…especially if it was by my own hand. The thought of anything hurt him. One of the most fundamental instincts of a mother is the drive to protect her children. Which is why female animals in the wild (especially those pregnant or with young offspring) are some of the most aggressive and vicious animals out there.
It’s in a woman’s nature.
I can’t speak for Ms. Beck, but it seems she felt this instinct and had no way of stopping it. It doesn’t sound as if the clinic workers or doctors stopped to even talk to her about it.
How cruel of you to wash your hands of her, and all women who suffer from abortion.
They are just as victimized by the Culture of Death as their children.
zeroangel - Your callousness in #58 is offensive and, from my perspective, bordering on cruel. The indifference shown in your flippant little dialogue completely downplays the anguish I can only imagine Emma went through when making her decision and seeking advice.
zeroangel said:
Your point is pure speculation. It is not supported by what we know. There is no history of mental instability (her mother probably would have mentioned that). What we do know is that her death is in direct relation to her having had an abortion.
JW2:
BTW, pls don’t take anything I say personal. This is a touchy subject though because of the nature of it.
Well, you wouldn’t make that same decisions today under similiar circumstances would you? Of course age and experience are a factor.
Really? What a callous thing to say.
zeroangel,
This discussion is beginning to take a turn for the worse. You don’t have to accept the fact that we feel pity and sorrow for Emma. We can agree to disagree. Is it really necessary to turn this thread into bash Emma and any woman who has had an abortion thread? Yes, the subject matter is a sensitive issue which means you should show a little tact when speaking about it. There is no need for the rest.
30 pcs, its not speculation. She killed herself over something that many other people (some on this forum) have dealt with, albeit painfully. Apparently, she couldn’t cope, its evidence in itself.
JW2:
If I offended you personally, I apologize, that was not the intent. Am I callous? Perhaps. It was to illustrate a point.
She couldn’t cope, and is being pitied by many people here because she is perceived to be the victim.
So, again, what if she killed herself and the children AFTER they were born? Wouldn’t abortionists be holding her up as an example of why abortions are needed? Wouldn’t we be saying what a monster she is?
Apparently its a matter of timing. Kill the kids before they are born and you are a victom of abortionists. Kill them afterwards and you are a monster?
zeroangel,
Your point is the very definition of speculation. Again, if she had not had the abortion we wouldn’t know who she was and she very well could have gone on to be a wonderful mother to her twins. To say that she is unstable and would have killed herself after her kids were born is not supported by what we know. What we know is that she left a suicide note indicating that her life ended when her babies did. Period. Everything that follows is speculation.
30 pcs of silver:
True, I agree, it IS taking a turn for the worst.
I will agree to disagree.
Perhaps I could use a bit more tact.
I do want to make this one thing clear though:
I am not bashing any woman that has had an abortion. I AM pro-choice (though again defacto pro-life by always voting Republican). I do not think it is murder, I was only using that as an example in my arguement (ie, “we” say its murder but we pity a murderer?)
OK thats all. Later all.
zeroangel - Bull. You can’t just post any opinion you like here and then tack on “don’t take it personal” and expect that to erase the effects. That’s like people who think they can say all manner of insulting things so long as they add “no disrespect” at the end.
Your ridiculous dialogue in #58 betrays a serious lack of understanding about the issues at hand. I would never bar someone from participating, but perhaps given your clear lack of information you should be asking questions and seeking knowledge here rather than passing judgment and operating on speculation.
This completely downplays the emotional torture of such a scenario. You seem to feel that the situation is unique to abortion, but there are many things that a person does despite knowing it’s wrong and feeling horrible about it.
This just goes to show how little you understand about the way these abortion clinics work. They use liberal euphemisms and medical terminology to convince even the skeptical and frightened that there is nothing more understandable or natural than killing one’s own child. To explain to a concerned woman that her child is nothing more than a mass of cells and that abortion is a harmless procedure is at best incredibly deceitful.
If there is no God who decides what is right and moral? I’m having a hard time getting to anything else zeroangel says after reading that sentence. I think it’s rather arrogant to take a position that you are all knowing to the point that you know God does not exist. Does that not make ones self a god?
Excellent article MM. Had to stop reading it at one point because the monitor got blurry.
Azygos,
Great point about the atheist angle. It’s a dichotomy that most atheists haven’t figured out.
Never said I KNOW God doesn’t exist. I BELIEVE God doesn’t exist, big difference.
Who decides what is what and moral? Ronald Reagan? Other people? Society? Fact is, God doesn’t actually “decide” anything, people do, some do it in his name, other’s don’t. One does not need to believe in God to know its immoral to steal / murder / rape / etc.
JW2: *smile* said I was leaving it alone.
Azygos:
But who is the arrogant one? The one that honestly says, “I have no evidence that God exists so, to me, it’s logical to believe he doesn’t.” Or the one that says: “People who don’t believe in God have no moral compass.” ?
There is no dichotomy. No one is claiming to be God here. Thats my wife.
What you see going on over there and government healthcare, is a look into our future when we go to our own socialist healthcare. Abortions to be encouraged by the Left in control.
Yes, they do. Morality isn’t inherent. My son was not born knowing right from wrong, and neither was mankind.
The system of government and laws we have ties back into the Judeo-Christian values on which America was founded.
Without God, all things are permissible. And what’s the point of existence, then? Why the hell should I care about anyone or anything else if this is all there is? What would be the point? If there is no God, not even civil law would be binding.
Were I to believe there was no God, the only rule to live by would be, “Don’t Get Caught.”
You clearly don’t understand this topic, or from where morality flows.
No you taught him. Not God.
Agreed. But this does not mean God exists. It just means people that believed in God came up with a bunch of laws about morality that they said came from God.
No. There are plenty of reasons to lead a satisfying, meaningful life without relishing in wanton destruction, debachery, and slaughter. God doesn’t have to exist to make it a fact that people that do such things generally don’t live fullfilled lives that end very well.
Is your belief in God the ONLY thing that’s stopping you from killing your next door neighbor and raping his wife? I tend to think people (myself included) have more reasons then God or the police.
…and I am the arrogant one.
Zeroangel……
Why don’t you just go away and leave the ladies on this forum alone.
Your name says it all…. Zero
Sorry, I did not intend to hijack the thread. My prayers to Emma’s family.
JohnnyNJ:
*Heh*
Leave the ladies alone? The case was made that I was being tactless, I did not disagree. Mah bad.
However, I will state AGAIN: I am not belittling anyone that choose to have an abortion. I don’t see anything wrong with early-stage abortions.
I WAS belittling a lady that killed herself because she could not deal with the guilt of something that many people here agree she SHOULD feel guilty about.
Save the childish taunts man, you’ll get no traction there.
And where did I learn it from? My parents? Where did they learn it from? And so on…
Same thing as above. Bone up on Church history, it’s far more intricate than a bunch of crazy people claiming God gave them morality…
Newsflash, zeroangel: Believing in God does not make one arrogant.
But you cannot wrap your head around the concept that if *this* is all there is, all the prattle about higher motive for not doing bad things is just that — prattle.
My position that “Without God, all things are permissible” is a perfectly sound one because it has basis in truth.
I’m sorry that you don’t believe in God, but I’m not going to be cowed by an atheist.
Who said a woman should feel guilty about abortion? Who here - except for you - blamed Emma Beck for the abortion? No one here but you insunated that women who have abortions either shouldn’t feel bad about it or shouldn’t complain about feeling bad.
You’re the one who insinuated Emma Beck was mentally unhinged before the abortion when all evidence points to the contrary and idicates the abortion was what caused her anguish and suicide.
No - we hold the feminists, the Planned Parenthood supporters, the NARAL fanatics responsible. They’re the ones who treat abortion as if it’s no different than a manicure.
As I said above, I will not be cowed by you.
To put it bluntly: you are WRONG. W-R-O-N-G. Wrong. About abortion being “right” and about us saying women should feel guilty about it.
You come here, you insult women who’ve shared very painful and personal stories with us and you besmirch the memory of a woman who suffered greatly after the Culture of Death convinced her abortion was No. Big. Deal.
I always try to maintain a civil tongue, but you’re getting under my skin in a way few commenters do.
English:
Thier parents, and so on. *I* do not believe at any one point God taught a human anything. Maybe you disagree.
So? Your point was about laws and government being tied back to Judeo-Christian values. No matter how much history is there, none of it is proof that God exists. Also, I never said anyone was crazy.
BTW, as I have said elsewhere. I am “Culturally Christian.” I go to church on Christmas, and I believe the same Judeo-Christian values we are talking about are spot on. Still doesn’t mean i have to believe in God.
No but telling someone “you clearly don’t understand the topic” when talking about beliefs on a topic that can’t be disproven one way or another DOES make you arrogant.
Saying things like “you clearly can’t wrap your head around” is also pretty arrogant.
No one is cowing you to do anything I’m just respnding to your responses to me. You can stop anytime you like.
No - it makes me a realist. You don’t understand the religious implication of morality because you don’t believe in God. It’s a fact, not arrogance.
I believe the first one was “Army” though she used the word “shame” as opposed to guilt. There were a few others about asking for God to forgive them. If no one is guilty of anything why do they need forgiveness?
I am not insinuating anything. I am stating something. Emma was mentally unstable as evidenced by the fact that she killed herself. Mentally stable people don’t kill themselves. Whether or not the abortionists are partially cupable is (to me) a side issue.
Go ahead and write it 4 times. It still doesn’t convince me, or mean you are right. Are you trying to convince me of anything or am I just pissing you off? If its the former, you can stop trying, its its the latter, well then stop reading.
Show me where exactly I insulted any woman other than this one.
One can’t downplay the pathos of this incident yet this woman’s mental health must be questioned. As with zeroangel, I’m a pro-choice Republican. That doesn’t prevent me from recognizing the downward spiral into which moral equivalence speeds our society. I also worry about over-population. At the same time and thanks to islamo-extremism, the world will bless the U. S. and our still-robust desire for nuclear families and the American dream. With their help, ongoing exercise of the second amendment, as well as some peripheral ripple impact from Catholic immigrants, one wonders whether islamo-extremists have pursued due diligence with their cost-benefit analysis of any incursions onto this hallowed ground.
Well, they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles and they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn’t go. They ran so fast that the hounds couldn’t catch ‘em…
zeroangel - You can stop any time you like. Saying “you clearly don’t understand the topic” is not arrogant if it is actually clear that the subject does not understand the topic. Your perspective here appears to be purely that of a spectator who has no first-hand (or even second-hand) knowledge of anything being discussed here.
I read this blog all the time but am only an occasional commenter. That is because I wouldn’t wish to pretend to know more about a topic than I really do. I prefer to read and learn and insert questions where I have skeptcism about a poster’s comments.
You have written your comments with a superciliousness that has been incredibly insulting to me and, I imagine, to others who have truly been touched by this very serious issue.
I believe I have told you more than once that I find you to be incredibly insulting.
Oh? then explain it to me…
I know how it goes… to defeat the evils of “moral relativism” there must be a definitive “ultimate goodness.” Kant’s(?) ideas about “do only what you will to be universal law” and the “Golden rule” (not sure who first wrote that) have obvious holes… ergo: we NEED God.
Is that right? Or did I misunderstand something?
WOW! You are really making some serious assumptions. So lets say I did have a girlfriend once upon a time who decided she wanted to end the life of our unborn child. Does that make my comments any more or less valid?
Or are we talking about belief in God? Does it matter that I was raised Lutheran and was a believer for years and years (even into adulthood)?
Which topic are you claiming I have no experience with and it’s clear because i don’t agree with you?
Yes you have, but I’m still not clear at which point I attacked you personally or made some claim that woman you have abortions are inferior people. I made no such claim. You might think I am callous, and that may offend you, but I am attacking NO ONE except someone that some of you might say commited a “murder-suicide.”