Would you, could you, date a liberal?
I got married at 22 and haven’t had to worry about these kinds of things, thank goodness. But for those of you who are single and looking for politically compatible love, John Hawkins’ latest feature on conservative women and dating is an entertaining and useful read.
Here’s an excerpt from Sharon Soon’s thoughts. She blogs at Conservatives with Attitude:
[Hawkins:] Have you dated liberals before? If so, any difference you can tell between liberal and conservative guys?
[Soon:] Absolutely. It’s kind of like night and day. I have always had a policy of not dating liberals, but once, after a bad break-up, I dated a couple of liberal guys…
First of all, they don’t have the same values and I find that to be a fundamental problem. I know a lot of people are willing to accept that, but I’m not. Their whole world view is different from someone who has conservative values and traditional values as a way of life.
Being focused on yourself, and your rights, and materialism, and no ultimate sense of morality — because I guess when you believe in a more secular way of life, a more liberal viewpoint, it’s all about what you can do for yourself and how you can be happy…and you don’t have any belief in absolute truth or religious principles to guide how you live.
Ace, as always, shares his no-holds-barred thoughts.
What say you?
See what others have said
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Of course I would date a liberal. I would consider it to be a sort of missionary work and who knows good things could come of it.
I could, depending on the liberal. Some of them are so intense in their beliefs that they feel that virtually every political event affects them personally. Bush vetoes some environmental bill that they like and they are depressed because it is a direct personal attack on them.
Other liberals may have their beliefs but they can take politics in stride. Their lives don’t revolve around politics, and they can agree to disagree on politics, and talk about other things, or even politics, but without the intensity of true believers.
HeatherRadish said:
Career or not, educated or not, a conservative guy is by definition a guy with conservative values, which means he wants to commit himself only to a woman who will make her family (defined by her husband and children, NOT her mother and dysfunctional co-relations) priority.
WarTip said:
Rusty said:
You do realize you just described Ann Coulter as your perfect match.
(She has gay friends and knocks back the occasional martini.) I’m sure you’ll be happy together. 
Awwwww, gimme a break, this is New York City…
Yeah I don’t agree with HeatherRadish. You must not have met the right person yet.
And I actually found it the other way when I was dating … the conservative men wanted to know what I thought about things and what dreams I had for my life. Those who’s leanings were left of center … they were more interested in other things.
But, I didn’t date a lot. So it’s not a fair representation of the whole.
Lame. I have gay family members, have a drink every night, and didn’t get married until 4 years after I met my husband.
However, my liberal mother thinks: my sister in law who is black is not worthy, is against gay anything, loves socialism, thinks Bush is an idiot.
Sound familiar? Liberal hypocrisy at best. Racist, homophobic, socialist. And that’s a liberal for you.
i must say, the people who i’ve found most comfortable with interracial relationships have been conservative-leaning…ironic, huh?
Not in my family…see #106. It’s my (liberal) mother who has a problem with my brother’s interracial marriage.
OOps…sorry, read that wrong. I thought you said least comfortable for some reason.
Skip that.
It’s funny, but my wife THINKS she’s liberal… but when discussing any specific topic she’s pretty much a moderate-conservative.
Myself, I have a “live and let live” attitude, as long as no one else is harmed do what you will. Just because I live by conservative values doesn’t mean I can force that on others… but if my wife wasn’t a closet moderate-conserveative I don’t think we could survive as a couple.
I have gay friends, and several of my wife’s friends are very liberal. The funny thing is they expect you to respect and hold as valid any opinion or position on any issue… but refuse to do the same for people who hold opinions and positions that are incompatible with theirs.
It’s a funny thing.
No way, libs are the scum of the Earth.
Yeesh, you conservatives are a no fun bunch. “I never would because I’m married and have principles and blah-blah-woof-woof…”
Lookee here, if it was Scarlett Johansson, Angelina Jolie, Jessica Alba or just about every hot starlet in Hollyweird who babbles the shibboleth’s of fascist liberal whatnot, I would ABSOTIVELY date them and have rough unmarried sex with them. Of course, we’d be doing it to the dulcet tones of Ted Nugent and afterwards, I’d call Sean Penn and Keith Olbermann to inform them what I’d done and with whom before slamming the phone down with maniacal laughter!
As for real life: heck, no. Why should I waste my Jedi love skills on some ungrateful babe who’d sooner see me thrown in a reeducation camp as look at me?
Just reading through the responses to this topic…
I find myself wondering what exactly qualifies someone to be classified as “liberal.”
Do people on here think that people who do not think that the Iraq War was worth it are considered “liberal?”
(According to a CBS poll dated May 3/15-17/08, then 64% of people who fit that profile)
Some people on here think that political ideology determines who smokes marijuana and who doesn’t.
And then there is the assumption that all liberals are vegetarian or all vegetarians are “liberals.” *sigh*
Is it not possible for people to be socially “conservative” and “liberal” on other issues? Or vice versa where people may subscribe to a “liberal” position on some issues, but not others?
Some people do object to being lumped into a particular category.
Anyway, regardless of the issues that politcal labels raise up…
I will say this: A lot of people who have commented here seem to think that those who subscribe to “conservative” values automatically protect people from divorce. Unfortunately, I do not think that is the case as divorce and/or separation happens to “conservatives” as well. And there are plenty of couples who may described as “liberal” who have been married for years and years.
Some allege that liberals want to sleep around and just do things for sex (bloghoolligan post in #12).
Others (such as emjem24 in post #52) say that “liberal” guys are not honest. So does emjem24 not think that “conservatives” can be dishonest or that “liberals” can be honest? She then go on to say that liberal guys have a “fascination” with drugs. Does emjem24 think that all “liberal” guys do drugs?
And yes, liberal guys can be chivalrous as well. Chivalry doesn’t know political party or ideology either.
But if you choose to date people based on political beliefs, that’s your choice. You’re free to do that.
I just find it interesting that people who have had bad experiences blame the persons political beliefs and draw conclusions and not the character of that person.
Not only could I, but I also married her.
And my life could not be any more filled with joy than it is.
Date a liberal? Like kissing a decomposed toad.
i’ve done it and needless to say failed at it. so i stick with moderate or conservative men.
Been with my wife since high school so I don’t have to think about this either. If someone was a liberal but a good person (and hot maybe) yeah I could muddle through, but I’d lean toward a more Libertarian mate otherwise because like Liberals I find some Conservative women so steeped in doctrinaire social connery that I’d imagine there’d be much yelling when I dropped by the strip club or “accidentally” opened up a window full ‘o porn while working.
On either extreme my feeling is you find humorless scolds, give moderation and good old fashioned classical liberalism in a woman and I’m there.
Being older than most on here, I couldn’t, wouldn’t, can’t, didn’t…maybe i should change my thinking, lonely old man here. NAWW! Have to be true to yourself.
DarkKnight said:
How about this:
If you think we should not have gone in because Bushitler is a Nero of an evil American Empire, then you are a lib.
If you think we should not have gone in because ultimately the whole thing will be run by government employees who are naturally screw-ups who should not be given too much power, you are a rightie.
If you think we should pull out because no blood for oil (you proclaim at the rallies you drive to), then you are a lib.
If you think we should pull out because those ungrateful sand-monkeys are not worth the sacrifice of one drop of American blood, and we should be drilling in ANWR anyway, then you are a rightie.
Besides, there are no hard set rules for what a lib or conservative is. But there are general guidelines for where you lie. (I test out as libertarian with conservative leanings.)
don’t give up hope yet..
my wife is a doctor and I’m not..
she worked part time after we had kids to be home with them and she still made more than me at my full time job..
I believe it had to do with a gun in WWII.. the ammo belt was 27 feet long..
so, it came about ‘Did you give it the whole nine yards?’ ..
an old co-worker told me.. and it sounds good.. dunno how accurate it is
A discussion on the origin of “the whole nine yards” can be found here.
I never thought of using a checklist while I was dating, yet I was still able to find someone special to share time with. Early in our relationship I asked my partner if she was a liberal. She said no, she was an entemologist! She thought some definitions in modern American politics were very limiting (some of you may find that liberal thinking). I liked the fact that I found a woman who was not afraid of bugs.
Depends on the liberal. I’m not the sort to try forcing my view on other people. I rarely talk politics even with my friends. Even when I know they share my political views. Were I to meet a liberal woman who had a similar inclination to keep her views to herself, I could see dating her.
I would, and am. We see differently on almost every political subject, but who cares. The only thing that matters is if we make each other happy.
I just got done dating a liberal. No way never again. On our first three or four dates, each and every time she said “You know there are too many people in the world and not enough food” and I just stewed whenever she said that. So the last time we dated, I finally said “Well don’t you think it’s more that the dictators are withhold food from the people?” She was like “Well I guess you could be right.” UGH double UGH!!! NEVER AGAIN!
Regarding “the whole nine yards:”
Thanks to #66, #84, #121 and #122.
A recent study (google it for yourself on this dark day) showed that man married to feminists were happier and got more sex. The Feminine Mystique ho! (the last word in the pirate sense, not the hop hop sense).
Three men were talking about how often they had sex..
the first, newlywed, said about 3-4 times a week..
The second, married for about 5 years said 3-4 times a month..
the third, excitedly jumping up and down exclaimed, “Once a year!”
the others were puzzled, and the newlywed asked, “Once a year? Why are you so excited then?”
“Because tonight is the NIGHT!!”
“because I guess when you believe in a more secular way of life, a more liberal viewpoint”
What a crock. I’m non-religious, and am a conservative with a strong sense of morality.
I’m so sick and tired of this stupid idea that a secular lifestyle means immorality. I’d rather date a liberal than someone who holds ideas like that.
Nope, I could not date a liberal, because I would not date a druggie.
Emjem24 (#72) – I am sympathetic to your situation as I myself face a similar non-peaceful coexistence with an older sister. Unfortunately, this sister is overly educated and intolerant of anyone without initials behind their name. There is never a rousing debate of the issues because she always wins the battle of who can outshout who. So, my reasons for never, ever dating a liberal:
I can’t shout loud enough
I hate all the eye-rolling, shoulder shrugging, sighs.
I am retired military – somethings the vast majority of liberals “loathe”.
I am Christian – something the vast majority of liberals “loathe”.
I am Pro-America/American culture – something the vast majority of liberals “loathe”.
And, I can see the hypocrisy in what they say and do – and they “loathe” me for it.
I’ve been asked this before and my usual answer is, “Only if he’s really good looking and has a lot of money.”
In all honesty though, it’s important that a couple share the same values if it’s going to last. Not just the same politics or the same opinions, but how they live in the 24/7 world.
Even good looks and tons of money won’t make me consider a long-term relationship with a liberal….wait, let me think about the money part some more. hmmmmm.
I’ve been lucky to meet patriotic, conservative types and then later marry them [just two]. I dated a far-left attorney in San Francisco for a while but as many others have already said, he might as well have been speaking Swahili. I called it quits when he attempted to rationalize incest. I have one dear friend who is a left-wing attorney-lobbiest, but nearly all my favorite female friends are conservative as well. They don’t take themselves too seriously and are a lot more fun for just hanging out.
A M E N
They must have forgotten to mention that it was a study of deaf men.
On March 31st, 2008 at 3:53 pm, Larraby said:
Giselle who???
I’ve dated a few “smart” liberals in my time, but when there’s no there in their pretzel-logic, it was time to move on and not look back.
I would rather not date liberal women but usually they end up being my choice. Why? I am involved in the arts, and as we all know 99.9% of artsy people are of the liberal bent. Actually I find that liberal women tend to be attracted to me because I am a conservative. They like the challenge and arguing. Opposites attract, no?