Scroll for updates…the vote is close…at 1:47pm Eastern, it’s 224 NAY, 202 YEA, 7 not voting…stay tuned…1:50pm Eastern…the Crap Sandwich fails at end of allotted 15-minute recorded voting period…still no official announcement…

The curtain opens. C-SPAN is carrying live coverage of the House floor debate on the trillion-dollar-plus Mother of All Bailouts. I’ll update continually here through the vote. If you haven’t had a chance to inhale the “crap sandwich,” take a whiff here.

Texas Democrat Lloyd Doggett just ended his anti-bailout statement with “The vultures are coming home to roost.”

Indiana GOP Rep. Mike Pence is on the floor now decrying “the largest corporate bailout in American history…Reject this bailout and vote no…”

Meantime, the Hill reports dissent in both parties. And there’s a new activist website: No Cash for Trash.

Scurry, scurry: “With three hours of debate beginning just before 9:30 a.m., lawmakers expect a vote to be wrapped up before 1 p.m. Eastern time. Leaders of both parties are supporting the measure, but neither side has given a public estimate of how much support they have. During early morning votes on noncontroversial matters, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) hurried around the chamber floor, button-holing rank-and-file members and showing them papers, asking for their support.”

GOP Rep. Gresham Barrett commends the House Republican leadership for trying to improve the bill, but he cannot support it. “Taxpayers must not become the insurance policy for everyone’s bad financial decisions.”

10:50am Eastern. Oh, puke. Charlie Rangel is on the floor to support the bailout. “Those who have caused the problem have managed to get away without any blame.”

He speaks such inadvertent truth. See: Video: Democrats insist “nothing wrong” at Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac in 2004.

GOP Reps. Ron Paul and Virgil Goode rise to oppose the bill.

GOP Rep. Ted Poe is vehemently against. “It’s a sad time to be an American taxpayer!”

Democrat John Dingell, fresh off his $26 billion automaker bailout victory, asks Barney Frank to clarify that the banking bailout will cover auto loans.

Why, of course, says Frank. Of course.

Here’s vid of Jeb Hensarling’s statement opposing the MOAB:

GOP Rep. Judy Biggert opposes.

Democrat Pete DeFazio opposes.

GOP Rep. Darrell Issa opposes. He’s blasting Paulson on refusal to deal with mark-to-market issues. “We are de-leveraging the enterprises we need today. End of Ronald Reagan era.”

Puke again. Maxine Waters is on the floor stroking Barney Frank’s ego and spewing pseudo-populist pabulum. “Americans are victims of predatory lending!” “Subprime exploitation!” “Greed!”

Flashback: “Mr. Chairman, we do not have a crisis at Freddie Mac, and particularly at Fannie Mae, under the outstanding leadership of Franklin Raines.”

GOP Rep. Scott Garrett opposes. He blasts both parties for failing to pass GSE (Fannie/Freddie) reform.

Barney Frank starts spouting about how Democrats passed GSE reform.

Who’s responsible?

GOP Rep. Jeff Flake opposes.

GOP Rep. Louis Gohmert vehemently opposes. “Who’s going to manage these assets? The same people who got us into this mess!”

Democrat Rep. Carolyn Kilpatrick coos and praises Barney Frank as a “genius.”

My airsickness bag is full.

GOP Rep. Paul Ryan: “This bill offends my principles, but I’m going to vote for this bill to preserve my principles…If we fail to do the right thing, heaven help us…We’re one month from this election. Unfortunately, a majority will have to vote for this. For me and my own conscience…I want to know that I did everything I could…As bad as this is, it could get a whole lot worse…”

Sorry. That is not computing.

GOP Rep. Jeff Fortenberry opposes.

GOP Rep. Ginny Brown-Waite opposes.

Democrat Rep. Marcy Kaptur opposes.

GOP Rep. Steven LaTourette opposes.

12:27pm Eastern. Nancy Pelosi has taken the floor. Here, GOP members who are voting for this monstrosity, is the woman you are hopping on the couch with. “Democrats believe in a free market. But in this unbridled form, encouraged by the Republicans, it has created not jobs, not capital, it has created chaos.”

Now, she is kvetching that the Bush administration didn’t back the latest Dem stimulus-palooza bill and cough up more government funds for broadband lines and infrastructure.

12:41pm Eastern. Pelosi is heaping praise on Barney Frank. Members on the floor applaud. She is demanding bipartisan support. Pelosi gets an ovation.

GOP Rep. Michele Bachmann rises to oppose the bailout.

Dem Rep. Dennis Kucinich opposes.

GOP Rep. Todd Tiahrt opposes.

GOP Rep. John Shadegg opposes.

GOP Rep. Spencer Bachus supports. “Unwilling to take a risk in not acting.”

The Democrats on the floor applaud Rep. Bachus. Barney Frank praises him.

GOP Minority Whip Roy Blunt is on the floor. “None of us want to be here today.”

I don’t want the crap sandwich swallowers to be there, either.

Blunt regurgitates the hype about how taxpayers will make money off the bailout.

He’s not using any of his time on the floor to beat down Nancy Pelosi’s attacks, Barney Frank’s jibes, and the rest of the Dems who have pinned all the blame on the GOP.

1:13pm Eastern. Barney Frank struts to the podium.

Frank is touting the power the bill gives to the government to meddle in foreclosure prevention.

Democrats on the floor give him a prolonged ovation.

Very chilling.

Now, John Boehner is on the floor. And he’s getting an ovation.

Lots of back-slapping all around.

Boehner’s the 100th person on the floor to whine about how nobody wants to vote for this, but he’s voting for it.

Careful not to choke on that crap sandwich now.

1:20pm Eastern. He calls it a “mud sandwich.”

“These are the votes that will separate the men from the boys, girls from the women.”

These are the votes that separate the crap sandwich swallowers from the crap sandwich spitters.

The swallowers give Boehner another round of applause.

Democrat Majority Leader Steny Hoyer gets the last word. Promises “investigations.”

Dodd, Frank, Fannie/Freddie-greased lawmakers all exempted, of course. Hoyer declares it “The People’s House” doing “the people’s” business. Another self-congratulatory round of applause.

Debate ended. Voice vote. “The ayes have it.” Recorded vote ordered.

1:45pm Eastern. Less than two minutes left. Nays are leading. 171-167!

Fina votes trickling in…I see 210 against, 189 for, 35 not voting…

Now 213 against, 192 for, 29 not voting…

220 against, 195 for, 19 not voting…

1:50pm Eastern…the Crap Sandwich fails