The forbidden skit: Full transcript and screenshots of SNL’s Soros/Sandler bailout satire
NBC is furiously erasing its tracks. Any attempts to upload the forbidden SNL bailout skit skewering George Soros and his left-wing subprime schemer friends Herbert and Marion Sandler will likely be squashed. So, I transcribed the whole comedy sketch for you and provided screenshots for the 7-minute video that has disappeared from NBC and Hulu. (Pat Dollard’s blog has posted the full clip on its server. Thanks to Ms. Underestimated for the .wmv file.)
The hits on the Sandlers ( “People who should be shot”) and Soros ( “Owner, Democratic Party”) occur near the end of the skit.
***
Announcer: Next on C-SPAN, President Bush, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, and Congressman Barney Frank appeared earlier today at a joint press conference to comment on the financial bailout measure just passed by Congress.
Bush: Good afternoon. On Friday, this Congress was able to put aside its differences and come together in the bipartisan spirit to pass legislation that was absolutely vital to ensure world confidence in our financial markets and prevent a collapse of credit which would have had a catastrophic effect on our economy. Approving this bill was the right thing to do and I commend our legislators for their actions. Speaker Pelosi.
Pelosi: Thank you, Mr. President. I, too, applaud Congress for this vote and add that without your vote, this bill might well have failed. Even though this crisis was 100 percent the fault of your administration and it’s insane economic policies. And though I’m sure you’ll agree, you will go down in history as our worst president ever. This one time, you did manage to not screw things up and I wanna acknowledge that.
Bush: Thank you, Madame Speaker. I was glad to do it.
Frank: Let me add, Mr. President, I was also pleased to see that for the first time during your eight years in office and possibly your entire life, you were able to demonstrate leadership, not to mention simple human decency.
Bush: You bet, you bet.
Pelosi: Let’s not forget, Mr. President, that it was the Democrats that first sounded the alarm about the risky mortgage loans that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were encouraging and that your party resisted all our efforts to rein them in.
Bush: W-w-w-w-ait. Wasn’t it my administration that warned about the problem six years ago? And it was the Democrats that refused to listen?!
Pelosi: What? Who told you that? That’s crazy. It was completely the other way around.
Frank: Actually. This time, he’s sort of right.
Pelosi: Shhh! Don’t say anything. He doesn’t know. Now, there was another point we wanted to make here and you are welcome to stay.
Bush: Thank you. I’d like that.
Pelosi: Back there would be better.
Bush: No problem.
Pelosi: In the past few weeks, this debate has focused on the wisdom of government intervention in the housing markets. What hasn’t been talked about is that behind every home foreclosure, there is a story of real suffering by real Americans. People who, but for the grace of God, could be you or your neighbors. And today, we’d like to introduce you to some of them.
Michael McCune and Jerome Gant, two ordinary Americans whose only crime was to play by the rules and who now find themselves facing eviction from their homes.
Please tell us your story.
Michael: Uh, well, to start. I still don’t understand how this happened to me. I mean, I fit all the requirements for a subprime mortgage. Uh, no credit history.
Jerome: Same here.
Michael: No job.
Jerome: Me neither.
Michael: Minor criminal record.
Jerome: Ditto.
Michael: Dishonorable discharge from the Army.
Jerome: Yeah, I got mine right here.
Michael: Uh, drug problems.
Jerome: Me, too.
Michael: Uh, alcohol problems.
Jerome: Guilty as charged.
Michael: Gambling addiction.
Jerome: Yeah.
Michael: Pregnant girlfriend — actually, two pregnant girlfriends.
Jerome: Just the one.
Well, I was talked into a balloon mortgage. Where you move into the house. And then you get to live in it. And you don’t have to, like, pay money or anything to the bank. But then later, you do.
Jerome: Yeah, what up with dat?
Michael: I mean, you could say I’m a double victim, since I never had a job and now I don’t have a home!
Jerome: Well, I’m a triple victim, because now I’ve been charged with arson for allegedly setting fire to the house they evicted me from.
Pelosi: You are both in our thoughts. (Hugs Michael. Won’t hug Jerome.)
This is Greg Phillips and his wife, Judy. How did the housing collapse affect you?
My wife and I bought two dozen time-share condos which we heavily mortgaged in order to flip them 6 months later for triple the purchase price and then the real estate market tanked.
Pelosi: And you were doing this through…
Judy: Misrepresentation.
Pelosi: No, I meant, did you do this out of your home…
Judy: Out of greed.
Greg: Yes, out of greed.
Pelosi: And now, with the real estate market down, you’re stuck with two dozen time-share condos that you can’t sell…
Judy: Unless we can sell them for, like, 10 percent more than we paid.
Pelosi: So, you can’t make your mortgage payments.
Greg: Not without selling the boat. Or putting off essential cosmetic surgery.
Pelosi: And who is this? This is Crystal, our surrogate mother.
Crystal: Waaaazup?
Judy: You see, I can’t have children…without getting bad stretch marks.
Pelosi: You are also in our thoughts and prayers.
This is Herbert and Marion Sandler. Tell us your story.
Herbert Sandler: My wife and I had a company which aggressively marketed subprime mortgages, and then bundled them into securities to sell to banks such as Wachovia. Today, our portfolio is worth almost nothing — though at one point, it was worth close to $19 billion.
Pelosi: My God. I am so sorry. Were you able to sell it for anything.
Herbert Sandler: Yes, for $24 billion.
Pelosi: I see. So in that sense, you’re not so to speak, actual victims.
Herbert Sandler (chuckling): Oh, no. That would be Wachovia Bank.
Marion Sandler: Actually, we’ve done quite well. We’re very happy.
Herbert Sandler: We were sort of wondering why you asked us to come today.
Marion Sandler: Anyway, it’s delightful to see you, Nancy. (Kisses Pelosi.)
Herbert Sandler: And thank you, Congressman Frank, as well as many Republicans for helping block
Congressional oversight of our corrupt activities.
Frank: Not at all. Let me say something else here. You know, many of you are probably wondering, “Where will that $700 billion missing from our economy go?” To help answer that, let me introduce our good friend, billionaire hedge fund manager, George Soros.
Soros: So what became of zat $700 beellion dollars? Well, basically it belongs to me, now. Actually, it’s not even dollars anymore, but Swiss franks, since I have taken a short position against the dollar.
Bush: Oh, really. That’s not good.
Soros: You’re not to speak. I don’t like you.
Yes, uh, zee U.S. dollar will have to be devalued sometime next week. Either Tuesday or Wednesday. I haven’t decided wheech yet. It will depend on how I feel.
Frank: Thank you very much, Mr. Soros. You’re a great man.
Soros: Could I just add that even though you know what’s coming, you won’t be able to do anything about it.
Pelosi: You’re a wise man, Mr. Soros. And a powerful one.
Frank: You are better than us.
Soros (pointing to Anne Hathaway character): Your wife is physically attractive. Sell her to me, please.
Greg and Judy: Sure. Ok.
Announcer: We’ll now leave this press conference and join a discussion of Sen. McCain’s foreign policy positions already in progress. Gov. Palin is about to say something embarrassing.
##End##
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Michelle, you ROCK!!!
Great work. Thank you for taking the time to transcribe.
<3
Michelle, you’re THE BEST!!! Thanks!!!
AS Arte Johnson used say in countless skits (dressed up as a WWII German soldier on Laugh-In in the 1960’s):
Velllly Interesting…..
That video should be used by McCain as a campaign ad:
The cover-up of this “forbidden skit” is just one more example of…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZScdmUQ_bEg
is the youtube link. You can save it via http://www.keepvid.com before they yank it. Save as .mp4
I have a link with the video on you-Tube “Once it’s out there it’s out there”
MSM covers for Dems on Fannie, Freddie
October 6, 2008 12:08 PM by Michelle Malkin
Shhhhhhhhhh.
Just a thought… Somewhere in New York a SNL Writer is looking for a new job,
Thanks Michelle! Good skit and true.
NBC (SNL), PBS (Gwen, baby), et al – all completely in the tank for Obama.
Nota Bene – this is just a preview of an Obama administration, so this is good practice in saving televised programs from the ash heap of censorship.
We will need a national corps of TIVO attendents, ready to transcribe key programs onto memory sticks and bury them in the backyard to preserve an accurate history of the Obama years.
or his HEAD!
I watched the video on the link provided. It was truly hilarious. Truth hurts.
Seems the people at the top of NBC don’t want the traditional skewering of both sides in their political comedy just now, do they?
They just screwed up and gave this clip a rocket booster!
Now, the forbidden fruit is even more tempting, isn’t it? Hahahahaha!!!!!
But of course, they had to get a shot at Sarah in there at the end. I’m becoming very tired of this constant drumbeat, “she’s stupid, she’s stupid”.
Sarah Palin has arrived on the national stage, and she isn’t leaving. I am now absolutely convinced Sarah will be the first female President of the United States someday. No doubt about it, just a matter of when, and how. VP first, or a 2012 comeback?
I may have to go and sign up for the Secret Service.
That was very funny…for once.
I just emailed it to 3 friends of mine.
Brian72 said:
I’m right behind you, dude!
Excellent find Michelle! I’ve posted it on my blog with a link back to you. Please be advised that you are now promoted to Freedom Fighter by Sergeant Ronbo for your service to the Republic.
SNL actually funny. Will the wonders never cease.
I hope, perhaps without justification, that the mass of good Americans will be repulsed by this effort by a handful of billionaires to buy our political system. If the people vote against them, they cannot win.
But so many people are just playing along, listening to the pretty Obama music, and being distracted by the shiny objects at the edge of the screen. We need to appeal to their intelligence and better judgement, before it is too late.
They just “buy” their way in. Money and politics go hand-in-hand. There was once a time when politicians considered it shameful to “campaign” for an office; bad taste and showed too much ambition, which people thought dangerous. Now, they start running a few minutes after the new President is installed. It’s all to curry the favor of the money people.
OT:
Just heard on radio Jerome Corsi has been detained in Kenya.
author of Obamanation
So his is the famous ‘Freedom of Speech’ Americans enjoy!
That was the funniest thing I have seen in a long, long time. I started reading the script, but I couldn’t believe it was true. Would SNL actually criticize the Democrats like that? I clicked on the link and watched the video. It is real! (pinches cheek)
I don’t know which I should do more – laugh or cry. It is so funny precisely because it is so accurate. Especially the depiction of Bush being a doormat and scapegoat, sigh.
Nice. I suggest everyone here open a youtube account and upload the video. They might have some problems trying to stop a flood like that.
Bansharia, are they detaining him Odopeys bros hut?
I think there is one justification for pulling the skit because of the subtitle used under the Sandlers “People who should be shot.”
But that’s certainly easy nuff’ to fix in the editing room to put it back up simply by substituting the word ’shot’ with:
A. Flogged
B. Pilloried
C. Tar and feathered
D. All the above.
AJ,
Lmao I don’t know but CBS early show just stated the news, needless to say they made non of their usual snarly comments.
Dance,
I vote for 2 steaming piles.
The whole thing is very odd, and I’m not referring just to the NBC erasure effort.
I am surprised that anyone at SNL knows who Soros is, much less Herbert and Marion Sandler.
This “financial crisis” and near-inevitable election of Obama may end up making Americans post-modern Alices in Wonderland, falling through the looking glass into a dark neo-Soviet world where humor is criminalized.
I wonder if the collective unconscious over at SNL knows that their days of free-ranging jokes are coming to an end, and the stale breath of “hate-speech” censors will be on the back of their necks in the future.
Curiouser and curiouser…
Being shot is so final, these guys need to suffer, put them in a dunk tank that’s open 24/7 with free throws for the rest of days.
It’s Killin em and
I Love it!!!
McCain/Palin 08′
Image: blub, blub, blub.
lol, the media doesn’t elect POTUS.
the people will not elect this
manpos.The Case of the Vanishing Skit. It’s all Bush’s fault, you know.
I like the “stretch marks” line, which I didn’t catch the first time. Good skit in general, SNL. More of these evenhanded jabs, please.
There are situations such as this, when I would like to be wealthy enough to to go after the Soras and Sandler types. A good friend of mine was once in the same financial category as those two social ingrates. He tried to play the big game and lost but keep his moral high ground. These two are rich but have lost their souls.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RKQuAwqAbs
It is there!
diggafromdover… Who got you youtube video back up? How long do you think it will stay there?
buy a block of PWE use profits for ammo,seeds and canned goods.
Funny because it’s true . . . or frightening because it’s true?
Every time I read a book from the Left Behind series my mind sees George Soros as the Carpathia character.
I live in northern Idaho. This is Mormon country. I’m always prepared and it’s a good feeling to know most of my neighbors are also. I’m not Mormon but you’ve got to admire their self reliance.
I sure don’t feel real good this morning about McAmnesty’s chances.
I’m not a religious man but I do see the world of good and evil. Soros is evil.
Down the memory hole it goes, well sort of. What I cant believe is that people still think the MSM is unbiased.
This is proof positive that the deck is stacked.
I’ve click on that youtube 3 times and the viewer count does not change. WHATS UP WITH THAT?
As long as he doesn’t seem to want to grow some, why should we feel good about the top of the ticket? As Rush says, this is going to be a referendum on Obama. Just wish our side would take more advantage of all the golden apples laid at their feet.
Ostrich Syndrome
More. Please.
jangar . CAN YOUTUBE CONTROL THE VIEWER COUNT?
Can somebody disable it? Beats me, just a thought.
Fam,
I am not either but grew up with many and at the risk of sounding trite have many pals who are. In their honor I call my bits Morman shopping etc
be sure to rotate, I uee a sharpie for exp dates.. eyes ain’t what they used to be.
Good Idea. I’m an old farm boy. Putting food up is just part of the lifestyle.
“I’d like Fillet of Sandler, please.”
Sorry sir, but this was taken off the menu.
“But why? I just ordered it last Saturday.”
The “owner” took it off the menu.
jangar I’ve clicked on it 10 time It’s holding at 1202. My conspirator mind will check back in 4 hours.
Yea, makes me wonder. I mean, if the left puts their foot into it and it gets too much play, wouldn’t that make those at the top a little nervous?
I can hear it now…
OBAMA: “Uh, hello…this is the, um, Messiah…that skit you did is NOT helping, uh, Michelle’s children…”
Has anyone noticed that the old image of the fat cat Republicans who toss poor windows and orphans out in the cold is being replaced.. We now have fat cat liberals destroying monetary systems which does the same thing.
Just a thought.
Wow! I am surprised the skit even got on the air.
The Sandler couple appeared to be so far fetched, I did not realize (or hope) that they were real people.
I guess it is fine to mock Palin and have it replayed on the morning tv talk shows, but if it involves the very real transgressions by some truly slimy rich Democrats. The Soros charicature was dead on.
Nice job, NBC. Suppress the truth for your Democrat masters. Nice of you to demonstrate just how deeply in the tank you are.
Will Michael Moore make a “documentary” of that?
Fam,
may God continue to Bless you
last update was Corsi has been released.
Fam,
dem slacks and media hacks DESTROY everything they touch. This remains very odd to me in that no matter what twister version of the logic they still come out losers.. it is creepy.
psssttt Elizabeth Dole is kicking ahem
on Glenn Beck now if you missed she begins aprox 1/2 hours into program:
http://radiotime.com/Search.aspx?ChannelId=57917
can find a linkie there if you dont have blah blah blah
I watched this Saturday Night and couldn’t believe what I was seeing! I wished I had taped it. It just floored me, knowing how liberal SNL is, that they would put something on that totally trashed the democrats and showed them in the tank for George Soros. I usually fall asleep way before SNL is finished, since most of the show is total junk. Not like the old days of Martin Short, Eddie Murphy, Dana Carvey, etc.
that makes two skits they have rapidly pulled. they did the same thing about the two reporters discussing todd palin and incest. the connection of those two skits both show the core propaganda machine of the democrat party and the democrat party for the slime they are.
I noticed Anne Hathaway in the skit. That is quite ironic as her ex-boyfriend Raffaello Follieri was arrested for fraud two weeks after they broke up.
I copied the transcript to my My Space page, if that’s okay.
It’s linked back to here and I encouraged any readers (I don’t have many) to come here to see the screen caps.
But in case they don’t, I think the transcript ought to be disseminated as widely as possible.
George Soros isn’t charismatic or good-looking enough. He is too obvious also. The antichrist will be much more devious and appealing to the masses.
True, but it’s his basic character and appeal to the masses that tells me just how ‘lead by the nose’ some can be.
Sorta like obama????
:beer:
Sorry just trying something out because the preview button didn’t work
Barney Franks is bringing sexy back
http://bellalu0.wordpress.com/2008/10/07/barney-frank-and-herb-moses-the-love-connection/
Well, this seems to be it – the video has been purged from youTube by NBC Universal due to copyright problems. Which, of course, is complete BS, since there are aabout a thousand other SNL videos on youTube, which seems to be no problem at all.
Another round, bartender!
This whole Wall Street scamnesty and the George Soros connection (inadvertant??) makes me wonder whether the trashing of the economy and the dollar is a deliberate ploy to forward the agenda of the North American Union and the supplanting of the dollar with the euro.
Yikes – I must be a conspiracy nut!!! Sure would rather that than prescient.
The Thunder Run has linked to this post in the – Web Reconnaissance for 10/07/2008 A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention, updated throughout the day…so check back often.
Do any of you techie people know how to repost the video on youtube?
Obama is almost perfect as the antichrist, except, I believe the common interpretation is that the antichrist is born in a country other than the U.S. Oh, wait…
We recorded SNL this week and my daughter was watching last night and I could not believe my eyes. One of the best written skits ever (and its been a long time since the last one).
SNL can be quite effective at erasing skits they want to hide. Try to find any trace of “Monkey’s Throwing Poop at Celebrities”, a particularly vulgar piece ridiculing Sean Connery.
Can we throw some at Soros?
They don’t update in real time.