This pumpkin pattern does not help my kids

By Michelle Malkin  •  October 22, 2008 12:03 AM

Looking for something scary to put on your front porch for Halloween?

Boo!

***

One of my other favorite pumpkin designs:

1vomit.jpg

Posted in: Fun, Michelle Obama

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Comments


  1. #509768
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:08 am, Send_Me said:

    My sentiments exactly.

  2. #509769
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:11 am, feebiebabe said:

    ROFL. Well, thats damn frightning…

  3. #509773
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:18 am, alaskangrizzly said:

    That pumpkin with MO carved into it would certainly send me running away from whatever house it was being displayed from…

  4. #509774
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:19 am, SFWife said:

    Just like the sex offenders who have the pumpkin on the door cautioning there is NO candy…this symbol will be to caution you will have to spread your wealth of candy amongst all who come to the door with you! (Even the candy you have already worked to earn yourself those last 5 blocks!!)

  5. #509776
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:22 am, FIslam said:

    Another Tylenol Halloween…

  6. #509777
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:23 am, FIslam said:

    Who you callin’ Pumpkin Head Sucka!

  7. #509784
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:37 am, ITookTheRedPill said:

    I shouldn’t have put that image in my head before going to bed!

    Nightmares of a bitter and “perenially dissatisfied” Michelle Obama yelling “We’re in charge now!”

    /sarc

  8. #509786
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:43 am, ammo john said:

    Anyone looking at that pumpkin will surely turn to stone.
    With that scary carving on the porch, you can leave your house unlocked and not worry about thieves!

  9. #509787
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:43 am, emjem24 said:

    Gag, who would do a pumpkin with that face (not the puking one)? Yet another reason why the little kid in me that used to enjoy Halloween has stopped the past couple of years.

    Not to ramble but quick story: I live in a predominantly black neighborhood with a few token white military/federal employees and one Asian family to keep it interesting. The past 2 Halloweens, I went all out, decorated, got the candy and what I got in return were several casually clad adults and teenagers/kids (no costumes) trick-or-treating.

    I gave them candy to make them move along but inside I just wondered: if you don’t even want to dress for Halloween or have your kids do so then why go begging for some candy? This is what I felt they did.

    The past 2 years in this SE VA neighborhood were enough to know that my good will was being taken advantage of. I didn’t experience this when my husband and I lived in Colorado 2 years ago.

    These lazy Halloween panhandlers are in for a rude awakening this year. I’m boycotting Halloween. I used to get a kick out of all the little kids with their cute costumes but these days a lot of people don’t make an effort so why should I?

    Nope, call me the Halloween witch. How does one announce that they’re not giving out candy? Lights out? A sign? No costumes need apply?

    /Halloween rant off

  10. #509792
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:46 am, andreabeth said:

    This could be useful. I am going to carve a Michelle Obama pumkin and put a big black witch’s hat on top of it. Then see how long it lasts in my looney liberal neighborhood.

  11. #509793
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:48 am, The Ugly American said:

    Gotta say though…that one of Cindy McCain is pretty frightening in a Children of the Damed kinda way.

  12. #509795
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:52 am, alaskangrizzly said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:46 am, andreabeth said:

    This could be useful. I am going to carve a Michelle Obama pumkin and put a big black witch’s hat on top of it. Then see how long it lasts in my looney liberal neighborhood.

    Are we taking bets? Because if it really is land of the moonbats my bet is 2 hours tops. At first they’ll go “what is that?” which will ponder further curiosity to go “I think that is Michelle Obama” to “WAAAAAGH!” and wham a sledgehammer destroys your pumpkin.

    Just be sure to get it all on camera and have the police on speed dial. :D

  13. #509796
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:56 am, CO2 Producer said:

    She’s alive…ALIVE!

    Strange, the eyes seem to follow me across the room

    Now make sure every kid gets the same amount of candy for trick or treat, regardless of their age and regardless of whether or not they’re wearing a costume. And if they don’t feel like walking to your door, meet them at the sidewalk.

  14. #509798
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:00 am, Milwaukee Mike said:

    A pumpkin carved to ward off the evil spirits of capitalism and democracy!

  15. #509799
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:01 am, alaskangrizzly said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:56 am, CO2 Producer said:

    Strange, the eyes seem to follow me across the room…

    Reminds me of this classic picture

  16. #509800
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:02 am, CO2 Producer said:

    Actually, just leave the bowl of candy outside and keep refilling it when it empties…

  17. #509803
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:04 am, CO2 Producer said:

    alaskangrizzly: classic. It’s like a mirror image…

    All in good fun, y’all.

  18. #509804
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:05 am, Truesoldier said:

    I was thinking the ACORN emblem.

  19. #509807
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:10 am, Jet Jaguar said:

    I noticed that pumpkins are not white. Crap, I must be a racist! :(

  20. #509818
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:29 am, Paul-Cincy said:

    Whatever happened to M.O.? She’s totally MIA.

  21. #509826
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:47 am, scottthong said:

    Hi Ms Malkin,

    I am the one responsible for the the Obama Phone FAIL photo lol you posted here.

    I took a widely available images of Obama (purportedly) holding a phone upside down, and used the freeware image editor GIMP to add in the FAIL words.

    I submitted it to the Failblog, but it never got put up, which led me to jokingly rant that Failblog was liberally inclined (because it included a similar Bushphone image, but not mine, even though mine is funnier with the upside down FAIL to match the phone).

    I posted that rant on April 16, 2008:

    Is The FAIL Blog Liberal Democrat?

    Not sure how you came across my version of the pic though! In any case, you’re free to use it.

  22. #509831
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:02 am, mikepatr said:

    Oh people. It gets much, much more horrifying:

    http://www.yeswecarve.com

    You’ve only scratched the surface.

  23. #509833
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:04 am, CO2 Producer said:

    For the first time in its ripeness, some pumpkin is really proud of its patch.

    OK, I’m done. For now.

  24. #509836
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:07 am, mikepatr said:

    Oh yeah.. I almost forgot.
    Here’s something almost as spooky as my post a few minutes ago:

    http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/video/editvideo.php?v=1039428631166

    After the Sarah Palin Rally in Wilmington, OH we were briefly detained, and then released, by the Children of the ObamaCorn. They gave us Obama T-shirts and put crappy bumper stickers on my van. They programmed the GPS to only point towards Chillicothe, site of the next day’s Obama rally. Next they turned on the creepy music from COTC and some red-headed hippie, named Malachi told us we must go worship “The One” who walks behind the rows.

  25. #509837
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:11 am, mikepatr said:
  26. #509839
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:14 am, mikepatr said:
  27. #509850
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 3:21 am, AlohaGuy said:

    The Pumpkin of Dorian Gray?

  28. #509871
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:06 am, Bud Fox said:

    That is a nasty pumpkin.

  29. #509873
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:11 am, MarcoPolo said:

    They messed up the fangs in that first pumpkin.

  30. #509874
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:11 am, zorro said:

    Yikes! A ghoul!!

  31. #509875
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:12 am, Rob said:

    The pumpkin in the bottom picture looked at the pumpkin in the top one.

  32. #509876
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:23 am, cyrebus said:

    Spooky!

  33. #509878
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:27 am, POTUS said:

    It’s orange-but it’s still “racist”!

    Get used to that charge.

    /sarc

  34. #509879
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:33 am, pianoman said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:43 am, emjem24 said:

    How does one announce that they’re not giving out candy? Lights out? A sign? No costumes need apply?

    Lights out is the generally accepted method…but watch out for tricks!

  35. #509880
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:34 am, jangar said:

    This thread may take on a life of its own.

  36. #509882
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:39 am, jangar said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:43 am, emjem24 said:

    How does one announce that they’re not giving out candy? Lights out? A sign? No costumes need apply?

    Go some place else for the night…just make sure all doors and windows are locked, leave a lamp on. And if you have a big dog, let him bark his head off!

  37. #509883
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:40 am, ajmontana said:

    Ho Ho Ho!! oops wrong holiday…. Boo!
    Looking at pumpkin one gives one a reaction like pumpkin number two.

  38. #509888
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:46 am, FIslam said:

    Surrender Dorothy!

    That dawg is a menace to the community!

    I can cause accidents too!

    I do believe in spooks. I do believe in spooks. I do I do I do I do I do I do.

  39. #509889
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:52 am, Mrs. Happy Housewife said:
  40. #509890
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 7:59 am, gridlock said:

    “Boo”?!?

    All together now…..

    That’s Raaaaacissst!

  41. #509892
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:03 am, Lindsay said:

    Pumpkins are racist!

  42. #509895
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:10 am, nyc123me said:

    As if we needed more evidence of the Obama cult.

  43. #509896
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:14 am, 30 pcs of silver said:

    Be afraid! Be very afraid!

  44. #509897
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:15 am, tre said:

    Put that out only if you want to frighten children away from your house. If you want children to come then put put something less frightening like Freddy Krueger, or Jason Vorhees.

  45. #509898
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:16 am, ajmontana said:

    I guess we should give them a break, that’s the only glow they have left to cling to. nah, The insides of the pumpkin are the exact compound of Obama and Bidens brain.

  46. #509899
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am, sausage said:

    Double whammy for the evangelicals! The evils of Halloween AND a strong working woman who wears trousers!

  47. #509900
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:23 am, FamilyMan said:

    What a revolting way to start the day. Sausage is alive. Go back to your sand box kid.

  48. #509902
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:28 am, jangar said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am, sausage said:
    Double whammy for the evangelicals! The evils of Halloween AND a strong working woman who wears trousers!

    Is that your target?

  49. #509904
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:33 am, Kevin K. said:

    *sigh*
    Whatever happened to the days of non-political pumpkins?

  50. #509906
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:39 am, FamilyMan said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am, sausage said:
    Double whammy for the evangelicals! The evils of Halloween AND a strong working woman who wears trousers!

    Sausage doesn’t understand that we all live in a dualist theology. In the constraints of this existence we make decisions on our view of the creator. His fear is we will impose our moral high ground to his obvious limited perverse and socially destructive lifestyle.

  51. #509931
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:05 am, mjk said:

    Double whammy for the evangelicals! The evils of Halloween AND a strong working woman who wears trousers!

    Hmmm, Looks around apartment, sees Halloween candy ready for the kiddos in the neighbourhood, looks down at self, sees black trousers because self is ready for work). Looks around a little more, may not be “evangelical”, but probably is thrown into the same category because does practise a religion…..

    Not scared of myself, not scared of Michelle Obama, not scared of anyone, least of all a pathetic little tool who would be frightened of an actual “strong woman” if one (like myself) kicked him/her in the privates…..

  52. #509938
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:09 am, DBNinKY said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am, sausage said:

    Double whammy for the evangelicals! The evils of Halloween AND a strong working woman who wears trousers!

    Is that all this election represents to you, the possible chance to put-off people whose ideology and faith confound you?

    I know you’re British, but a First Lady who wears the trousers would hardly be a new concept for Americans to grasp, given Hillary is stilling wearing them in the Clinton’s arranged marriage.

  53. #509944
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:13 am, FamilyMan said:

    Sausage. Where did you go? Did the adult bookstore open already? Hooking up this early are ya.

  54. #509947
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:14 am, kcnut said:

    Don’t scare me like that.

  55. #509954
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:18 am, sonofdy said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am, sausage said:
    Double whammy for the evangelicals! The evils of Halloween AND a strong working woman who wears trousers!

    Like Palin???

  56. #509957
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:19 am, sonofdy said:

    sausage, you are dismissed.

  57. #509967
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:25 am, granite said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am, sausage said:

    ___________;

    fill in whatever.
    It doesn’t matter what this individual said.

    Anyone else see the similarity between this individual and the unfortunate mentally challenged – meant seriously, not as an epithet; actually, really mentally challenged – kid (or adult) in an audience who every now and then shouts out random, nonsequitur words and phrases?

  58. #509976
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:30 am, frostrt said:

    Who would want to trick-or-treat at a house with a Michelle Obama Jack O’ Lantern? They would take your candy away and tell you to “spread the wealth around”!

    LOL.

    Happy Halloween to MM and my fellow posters, Repubs, Dems, Indys, and all.

  59. #510014
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:51 am, NJ-Aviator said:

    I share the sentiment of the second pumpkin after seeing the bitter one.

  60. #510042
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:04 am, Paul Revere said:

    Why does Barry’s logo look like a road heading towards a sunset?

  61. #510049
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:08 am, frostrt said:

    Here’s a treat for all of you; made it all by myself :)

    moar funny pictures

    I’m under Kittehdo; go to my LOL’s. “Silence of the Jack O’ Lantern”.

  62. #510069
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:18 am, frostrt said:

    Sorry; messed it up the first time I tried. Here it is, I hope.

    Anywho, have a good one, all.

    Keep it up, MM!

    http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=2227628

  63. #510070
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:18 am, Henry said:

    ACK!!

    Some great carving patterns, including several election themed patterns, can be found on Zombie Pumpkins.

  64. #510115
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:40 am, sambo said:

    Enjoy this halloween kids because next year our kids will have to turn half their candy over to the fairness police!

  65. #510132
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:49 am, PKAmmoTroop said:

    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:56 am, CO2 Producer said:

    She’s alive…ALIVE!

    Strange, the eyes seem to follow me across the room…

    They seem to be following my wallet. Lord help us all!

  66. #510143
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 10:59 am, Roman Con said:

    Oh those bitter Dems, clinging to their paring knives and squash.

    But it is a fitting metaphor for the U.S. if the Obamessiah wins – our elegant coach of a nation will turn into a weak, overtaxed pumpkin with its hands (vines?) out.

  67. #510158
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 11:08 am, frostrt said:

    Here’s another; a little something to take our minds off the scaaaarrrryyy stuff.

    http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=2047385

  68. #510169
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 11:14 am, TooMuchTime said:

    Nomination for the scariest halloween costume ever.

    It takes two people. One in a business suit wearing an Obama mask. The other one in an Army uniform with a briefcase handcuffed to his wrist; he follows Obama around wherever he goes and never leaves his side.

    I shudder just thinking about it.

  69. #510185
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 11:21 am, shooter said:

    Looking for something scary to put on your front porch for Halloween?

    Is there a mistake?
    Both pumpkins look identical to me. Aren’t those the same pics?

  70. #510189
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 11:23 am, frostrt said:

    TooMuchTime:

    Great idea. If that won’t give quite a few people a good fright, I don’t know what will.

    Even Gaffe King Biden “shudders” at what might happen after Obama takes office (see MM’s previous “Gird Your Loins” post).

  71. #510305
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:14 pm, madchef said:

    Those Gaff-O-Lanterns are a great way for the kids to know which house to toilet paper!!!

  72. #510339
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:25 pm, frostrt said:

    And now, for your further LOL pleasure:

    http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=2157881

    Enjoy.

  73. #510409
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 12:45 pm, rocketman said:

    Don’t worry about the Michelle Obama pumpkin–Halloween only lasts one night.

    Worry about the next 4 years seeing M.O. and the O’Bummer trashing our country–and our wallets!

    John Bibb

  74. #510505
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:13 pm, tuffy said:

    If you were voting for Obama, why would you make Obama related Jack O’ Lanterns? They’re supposed to be scary. Are these pumpkin carvers subconsciously racist? Or is it overt (for reasons I can’t fathom)? They should be ashamed of themselves.

  75. #510630
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 1:48 pm, RetFireman said:

    That’s SOOOOOO Raaaacist!

  76. #510669
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:04 pm, frostrt said:

    To Tuffy:

    Did you click on the link?

    If you had, you would have seen not only Barak and Michelle Obama, but John and Cindy McCain, Sara Palin, Joe Biden, as well as slogans supporting one or the other and just encouraging people to vote.

    IMHO, the intent was not to imply that Obama is a “scary” potential President because of race. I don’t believe the idea is by/for racists.

    Just my 2 cents.

  77. #510713
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:29 pm, rightwingmom said:

    We don’t celebrate Halloween…
    That said, I like Huckabee’s idea…
    5% go Trick or Treating and share their candy with the 95% who deserve it… (after they’ve tested it for razors and poison)
    “Spread the wealth candy around!”

  78. #510739
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:41 pm, ArizonaNeanderthal said:

    mamaObama does remind me of the horsemen from Sleepy Hollow. Ichabod Crane is too easy :)

    Boo!

  79. #510768
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 2:51 pm, denver republican said:

    Jeez, it’s like drinking ipecac.

  80. #511201
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 5:14 pm, RetFireman said:

    The top one percent of all Trick or Treaters receive 40% of all the candy.

    I think that is unfair. I want to have those T or T get that candy to the ones who don’t even go Trick or Treating. Joe the Frankenstein’s Monster needs to understand that I want to make sure that the Trick or Treaters behind him has a chance to get some of HIS candy. It is only fair.

    Why should those that go out and get candy, work hard on getting their costumes made, get out there early before people turn off their porch lights, do all the leg work and walk the neighborhood diligently get all the candy. It should be evenly distributed amongst those that didn’t even bother to wear a costume and who simply stayed home.

    It is for the greater good.

  81. #511314
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 5:57 pm, Terry_Jim said:

    That ‘Aunt Esther’
    pumpkin might scare
    Fred Sanford,
    but I don’t think today’s
    kids will get the reference.

  82. #511525
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 9:22 pm, St. Louis Blue said:

    Who knew you could carve a water buffalo on a pumpkin? Double that man’s NEA grant!

  83. #511592
    On October 22nd, 2008 at 11:33 pm, keystone said:

    LOLOLOLOL!

    The only problem is that the pumpkin carving has her smiling.

  84. #511609
    On October 23rd, 2008 at 12:34 am, tuffy said:

    I was referring to a site that is dedicated entirely to Obama pumpkins. I don’t know what happened to my link and I’m not interested in chasing it down. It’s a community blog full of zombie eyed, pale skinned 20-somethings. Creepy.

  85. #511652
    On October 23rd, 2008 at 6:35 am, olblueyes said:

    Yikes!

    The Infidels have depicted the Messiah! Off with their heads!!! Beware America, your “Change” is on the Way…

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