“The Obama-Matic (TM) Content-Free Euphemism Generator”

By Michelle Malkin  •  March 27, 2009 05:07 PM

Apropos of the Pentagon e-mail exchanges over the whitewashing of “Global War on Terror” that I published yesterday, check out:

The Obama-Matic (TM) Content-Free Euphemism Generator.

***

If you have kids, this will remind you very much of the Captain Underpants’ Name-Change-O-Chart!

Posted in: War

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  4. The Obama-Matic (TM) Content-Free Euphemism Generator | bRight & Early
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  6. Common Sense Political Thought » Blog Archive » The Obama-Matic™ Content-Free Euphemism Generator
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Comments


  1. #661474
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:08 pm, chapoutier said:

    Links broken.

  2. #661481
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:11 pm, twofoot said:

    Same problem as the resident lawyer; link isn’t working.

  3. #661485
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:14 pm, Michelle Malkin said:

    Try now.

  4. #661487
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:14 pm, chapoutier said:

    Golden.

  5. #661492
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:19 pm, Khyris said:

    Column B is missing “Community,”

    If they were interested in being accurate, you could just replace all of column C with “Mistakes” or a more colorful term like “Phucuppery”!

  6. #661505
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:33 pm, ajmontana said:

    ha! perfect. to funny.

  7. #661506
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:34 pm, zyzzyg said:

    Euphemism generator or not, I could care less about what the terrorist who perpetriated 9/11 are called. It is about deeds, and not words.

    Osama Bin Laden’s head should have been on a stick a long time ago. Pres Clinton let Osama slip, and Pres Bush allowed Osama to slip. My hope is that Pres Obama follows through.

    It ain’t about words and labels, it is about deeds.

  8. #661507
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:34 pm, tre said:

    Maybe I could tell the police that I didn’t rob the bank, I just made an “Unauthorized, Undocumented Withdrawl”.
    I didn’t shoot the guard, it was a “Bank Contingency”.
    I wasn’t speeding away from the crime, I was driving at an “Unauthorized Velocity”.

    But, something tells me they’d just be laughing all the way to jail.

  9. #661510
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:36 pm, Hangfire said:

    It’s like being in the military again.

    “Barracks” begat “BEQ” (Bachelor Enlisted Quarters), which begat “UEPH” (Unaccompanied Enlisted Personnel Housing), etc.

    Re-branding and re-packaging is the new religion.

  10. #661514
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:42 pm, DesertLover said:

    Each day the administration announces something demonstrating such a lack of command of the English Language that is just shows us more and more why they refuse to release any of BO’s college work … I am sure his college papers are not “Teleprompter Worthy” and are therefore not for public view …

    I tried selecting one from each column but all it did was make me feel like I had just ordered Chinese …

    :lol:

  11. #661517
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:44 pm, cnredd said:

    This was such a good read from the National Review, I placed it on my forum…

    I mean “Interactive Reaction Facility”

    cnredd
    Political Wrinkles
    http://www.politicalwrinkles.com

  12. #661519
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:47 pm, swede said:

    zyzzyg said:
    It ain’t about words and labels, it is about deeds.

    Would that it were so. You’re referring to the real world, of course, not politics where sound bites and euphamisms are everything.

    In the immortal (if plagiarized) words of Dear Leader…”just words”

  13. #661521
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:47 pm, ajmontana said:

    lol dl, r u getting e mails??

  14. #661522
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:49 pm, DesertLover said:

    aj … on the road this week and next so haven’t checked personal email … should I?

  15. #661523
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:51 pm, ajmontana said:

    OT-
    no, you’re good, nothing important. Wondered if you were going to the D-Back/ Halo game.

  16. #661525
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:52 pm, DesertLover said:

    If I was home I would probably try to go … but alas not home … lol

  17. #661526
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:53 pm, ajmontana said:

    D-backs winning 7-1 :roll:
    guess we have to lose one once in a while. lol

  18. #661531
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:55 pm, DesertLover said:

    Been away so much not sure what my DBacks are looking like this year … will know soon I guess …

  19. #661532
    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:55 pm, ajmontana said:

    I guess it’s a “temporary setback Operation” sheeesh. :lol:

  20. #661549
    On March 27th, 2009 at 6:06 pm, cicerokid said:

    FUBAR by any other name is still…well, FUBAR!

  21. #661561
    On March 27th, 2009 at 6:22 pm, zorro said:

    I guess we should be thankful it’s not pig Latin.

    So, War on Terror would be:
    Arway onway Errortay

  22. #661563
    On March 27th, 2009 at 6:27 pm, DesertLover said:

    zorro ….

    good point … we wouldn’t want any accidental “swine odor” emissions …

  23. #661573
    On March 27th, 2009 at 6:39 pm, av8tr said:

    No more GWOT?

    OK, how about Transnational Reaction Mechanism?

    Sounds sophisticated.

  24. #661593
    On March 27th, 2009 at 7:15 pm, TooMuchTime said:

    Cross-cultural Consensus Capability

    Read as: You can fool all of the people all of the time.

  25. #661597
    On March 27th, 2009 at 7:23 pm, TooMuchTime said:

    Transnational Diversity Solution

    You mean like, “The Final Solution?” Yes, the liberals really are fascists. Read the book!

  26. #661605
    On March 27th, 2009 at 7:48 pm, Pasadena Phil said:

    The “Tower of Babel” bipartisan deliberation process. Quite an invention. Not everyone is allowed to participate in the discussion but those that are can assign their own definitions to words, assuming those words are allowed to begin with.

    What else would you expect from a one-party system at war with working citizens?

  27. #661608
    On March 27th, 2009 at 7:54 pm, Khyris said:

    Transnational Diversity Solution

    You mean like, “The Final Solution?” Yes, the liberals really are fascists. Read the book!

    I was actually in Borders the other day looking explicitly for that book since I had a coupon… they don’t carry it anymore.

  28. #661614
    On March 27th, 2009 at 8:08 pm, joannmandolin said:

    Failure. It’s the new black!

  29. #661615
    On March 27th, 2009 at 8:08 pm, joannmandolin said:

    Failure. It’s the new black!

  30. #661641
    On March 27th, 2009 at 8:57 pm, TooMuchTime said:

    I was actually in Borders the other day looking explicitly for that book since I had a coupon… they don’t carry it anymore.

    Borders carries this, instead.

    Look at the book on the bottom middle. Doesn’t it remind you of something? Hmmmm! Separated at birth?

  31. #661651
    On March 27th, 2009 at 9:24 pm, shooter said:

    Comprehensive Diversity Revision …
    heh,
    it works!

  32. #661654
    On March 27th, 2009 at 9:27 pm, Dimsdale said:

    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:34 pm, zyzzyg said:

    Euphemism generator or not, I could care less about what the terrorist who perpetriated 9/11 are called. It is about deeds, and not words.

    Osama Bin Laden’s head should have been on a stick a long time ago. Pres Clinton let Osama slip, and Pres Bush allowed Osama to slip. My hope is that Pres Obama follows through.

    It ain’t about words and labels, it is about deeds.

    I agree.

    One could say that Clinton might not have known how dangerous he was.

    In Bush’s case, the Democrats and every crackpot liberal/socialist/communist/anarchist group was trying to make Bush out to be the real danger, not OBL. Can you imagine the uproar if Bush went into Pokeestan too?

    Obambi considers OBL more of a political red herring than a danger, and would be more likely to prosecute him than bomb his butt. Before the “one” can do much of anything about OBL, he will have created a bigger problem here by importing the Gitmo detainees and eventually have released them into the population, or rather, the terrorist cells already here. It is looking like he will drag the war on terror to the U.S. with his laughable diplomacy efforts, which Iran and NK are already laughing at.

  33. #661658
    On March 27th, 2009 at 9:35 pm, havok said:

    Obama should consult with the South Park guys and get a few ‘durka jihad blakka’ phrases tossed in there.

  34. #661697
    On March 27th, 2009 at 11:19 pm, TooMuchTime said:

    What else would you expect from a one-party system at war with working citizens?

    Tyranny?

    Here’s good video about forms of government. They should teach it in school.

  35. #661716
    On March 28th, 2009 at 12:43 am, WarTip said:

    You know if I could not believe he was actually using something like this, it would be funny. As it is, it is just scary.

  36. #661723
    On March 28th, 2009 at 1:11 am, JHSII said:

    This is especially funny if you use a D10 for each column. Sadly, it’s more realistic too – rather than choosing.

  37. #661740
    On March 28th, 2009 at 2:24 am, PKAmmoTroop said:

    On March 27th, 2009 at 5:34 pm, zyzzyg said:

    Euphemism generator or not, I could care less about what the terrorist who perpetriated 9/11 are called. It is about deeds, and not words.

    Osama Bin Laden’s head should have been on a stick a long time ago. Pres Clinton let Osama slip, and Pres Bush allowed Osama to slip. My hope is that Pres Obama follows through.

    It ain’t about words and labels, it is about deeds.

    I’m going to assume that you know nothing about the military or warfighting because your statement basically says you know nothing about the military or warfighting.

    Words, labels and deeds are tied together in what we call “communication” which is the science of telling someone else what you’re doing or thinking. And Obamas lables have been talking as loud as his deeds.

    Obama has been communicating loud and clear to the troops since day one. And they’ve hear him.

    First he has refused to acknowledge the tremendous victory the surge was in Iraq. That tells the troops “You suck. I ignore your efforts.”

    Then he told the troops that he’s going to drop charges against the terrorists who bombed the USS Cole. That tells the troops “You suck. I hope you all get killed.”

    Then he told the troops that he’s going to take the terrorists in Gitmo that they’ve been guarding for years and dump them in American neighborhoods. That tells the troops “You suck. I hope these madmen made your lives half as miserable as they’re going to do to your families.”

    Then he said that he’s going to pull all the troops out of Iraq… except for 50,000 which don’t count. That tells the troops “You suck. You’re not worth counting.”

    Then he decided to charge the troops for their medical. That tells the troops “You really suck. Just die already.”

    Then he decided that the war on terror isn’t a war, it’s a contingency… an exercise. That tells the troops “You suck. Your blood means nothing to me.”

    Honest to God I’m surprised that anyone will lift a rifle for this incompetent fool.

  38. #661751
    On March 28th, 2009 at 3:47 am, graysonret said:

    Obambi considers OBL more of a political red herring than a danger

    Rather than prosecute him, Obama could designate him as “special advisor on Islamic relations”. Pelosi/Reid/Kennedy/Murtha would be all for that.

  39. #661838
    On March 28th, 2009 at 10:45 am, cheapseat said:

    aig is no longer aig, but has transformed itself into a successful valued wonderful company by simply changing it’s name. expect fannie, freddie, and citi to undergo such miraculous rebirths in the next few months. now what did phillip morris become? i’m wondering if bawney fwank will get married and decide to take his husbands name so he too can be reborn.

  40. #661939
    On March 28th, 2009 at 12:42 pm, Pasadena Phil said:

    It ain’t about words and labels, it is about deeds.

    Very sloppy thinking. Words matter. If we can’t agree on the definition of words, how can we discuss, argue and/or deliberate on our way to forming a consensus so that our deeds mean something?

    If only deeds count, we are back to the illiterate dark ages.

  41. #661951
    On March 28th, 2009 at 12:56 pm, mike.musculus said:

    #37
    On March 28th, 2009 at 2:24 am, PKAmmoTroop said:
    On March 27th, 2009
    . . .
    Honest to God I’m surprised that anyone will lift a rifle for this incompetent fool destroyer of the American “Empire”.
    [th above slight correction provided courtesy of mike.musculus]

    One old warhorse to another:
    ATTA-BOY!*
    [Yes, I know that under the new regs, the Acceptable Term has been changed again. I'm an old coot, cut me some slack!]
    :wink:

    Thanks! That is one of the most concise statements of President Lamech’s (A.K.A. “Stinky”, A.K.A. “President Cockroach”, A.K.A. “TOTUSes’ Meatpuppet”) unvoiced statements to the Armed Forces I’ve ever read.

    Of course, no one but a current or former AD/Resrvst will notice, and perhaps their families.

    Maybe his being tripped off into uncontrollable giggling when ever an interviewer mentions that the average person’s private retirement funds are being destroyed will wake them up. I seriously doubt it, however.

    OT
    Final Inspection was moved (by Housing) to Monday at 1000h. It seems the Civvie contractor “just didn’t show up” for work that day… and apparently this isn’t uncommon practice for him, either. Fire him? What non-sense! He’s a politically connected fellow, after all! ;~

    Moving into TLF Monday. Probably last comments during this weekend. [I don't have the patience for dialup, besides, they charge $1/"incident" + long distance...]

    Taking family out for some good old NJ pizza, b/f we’re gone. Almost as good as NYC w/o lining Bloomie’s pocket.

    Don’t argue w/me abt ChiTown & CA pizza — those are different animals. USA pizza started in NYC, and its the most like Granny’s…

  42. #669844
    On April 6th, 2009 at 1:20 pm, quixoticBen said:

    What a fantastic tool! The Obama Administration will be most grateful!

    Ben

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