Most believable defense ever: Woody Harrelson claims he mistook photographer for zombie
I have a very simple belief system: I believe in God, I believe in family, I believe in country, and I believe that it should be legal to beat up celebrity-stalking, intrusive vermin with cameras — known in some circles as “photographers.”
Last Wednesday, actor Woody Harrelson smashed the camera of a TMZ photographer and pushed him in the face (according to a complaint filed by the photographer), but Harrelson’s defense scores some points for both humor and accuracy:
Woody Harrelson defended his clash with a photographer at a New York airport Wednesday night as a case of mistaken identity — he says he mistook the cameraman for a zombie.
[...]
“I wrapped a movie called ‘Zombieland,’ in which I was constantly under assault by zombies, then flew to New York, still very much in character,” Harrelson said in a statement issued Friday by his publicist.“With my daughter at the airport I was startled by a paparazzo, who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie,” he said.
Quite understandably. Good on ya, Woody!
As a matter of fact, I also supported Sean Penn back when he was treating celebrity photographers like piñatas on Cinco de Mayo.
It’s like I always say, “I may not agree with your politics, but I’ll defend to the death your right to beat up celebrity-stalking photographers.”
Update:
ArizonaNeanderthal commented…
Except for that “to the death” part I like it!
Yeah, that was a little overstated, wasn’t it? I’d actually defend them to the point where anything better to do came up — and it wouldn’t take much.
See what others have said
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Does the cameraman really look like Hillary?
“quite understandably”? By who?
Oh no…Chap will completely dominate this thread!!
I could not disagree with you more, Doug.
“Live by the press, die by the press.”
The paparazzo are a creation of the Harrelsons of the world. Harrelson-types feed their narcissism from the slop-trough of the popular press.
They have no excuse to abuse the leaches they depend on to foster their egos.
I can and do take some comfort from the fact that the hack Harrelson has been relegated to making a zombie movie, however…
Ya’ll might laugh… but the zombie apocalypse is a comin’… beware…
Except for that “to the death” part I like it! May all stalkers be pinatas on Cinco de Mayo!
Odd day this–actually sympathizing with Harrelson. But lets play Wack a Stalker!
No. I always said if there was ever an actual thread on zombies, I would try to derail it with a talk about the stimulus bill.
“Live by the press, die by the press.”
Ragspierre, I totally agree. If the papparazzi suddenly ignored them, there are damned few of these Hollywood clowns who would not be chasing them, begging for attention.
It was when the guy with the camera said, “Braaainsss.” that did it.
Abso–stinking—luutly. Harrelson PAYS people to make sure the paps know where he is, and they would PAY the paps to be there if they had to…
but, but, but, w/o the poopoorazi’s what would we look at in the check out line?
Harrelson lied, zombies died.
mchristian:
Ah, but, see, that’s where the alibi breaks down…
EVERYBODY knows that a zombie would have no reason whatsoever to attack Harrelson…
why crack an empty egg…?
Maybe he will end up in jail and he can play cards with his dad, the murderer.
Magazines with pictures of Odumbo on them! Or how to lose 20 pounds in one week. Or other complete tripe. Perfect for the check-out lane where you can glance at them and gladly put them back.
Rag,
agree with you.
some hollywoodistan no talent actor whining about some loser stuck to having to take pics of his b-actorass!!
that commie should count his whatever atheists count.
Zombie flic must be about 2008 election and obambi voters.
No problem casting extras for that one Ban.
The stimulus bill, Woody Harrelson and SOMEBODY on this list ARE Zombies.
In Arizona we are being attacked by the worst of the Zombies-Californians. The paparazzo Zombies will follow.
We’d be back to the good ole days; headlines dealt with Elvis sightings and Bigfoot flying UFOs.
Yeah Well I Guess you can’t visit the sins of the father on the son…but…didn’t Woody try and get his father out? I have been told about this incident by a lawyer. There might be people in Texas who recollect the incident better.
Wikipedia:
Harrelson was born in Midland, Texas, the son of Diane Lou (née Oswald) and Charles Voyde Harrelson, who divorced in 1964; he has two brothers, Jordan and Brett, the latter of whom is a professional motorcycle racer. In 1979, in San Antonio, Federal Judge John H. Wood, Jr. was shot and killed by rifle fire by Charles Harrelson, who was a freelance contract killer.[1] He was convicted and eventually died during his life sentence in maximum security prison.[1]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Woody_Harrelson
Come on Chap. Being that you are a lawyer, I expected something about 1st amendment rights.
Now what about the stimulus bill?
Zombies have no ‘rights’–being, well, undead ‘n all.
A two-pronged conundrum for sure …
1. A hack actor starved for egocentric appeasing publicity yet expecting total privacy in a public setting at the airport …
2. An unscrupulous photographer that will go to any end to get “The Picture” that will hopefully bring a 5 or 6 figure payday from some ridiculous gossip sheet …
They feed off of each other … stop one you stop the other … can anyone say “Occupational Hazard” …
My feelings … Boo Freakin’ Hoo …
…
Careful, Spacey…
under the D’oh bama administration the UNdead would undoubtedly have more rights than the UNborn.
Not sure what is going on but 3rd time is a charm … all of a sudden on THIS THREAD my posts are never showing up …
This is a two-pronged conundrum for sure …
1. A hack actor starved for egocentric publicity expects total privacy in a public setting at an airport because it fits his personal agenda at the time …
2. An unscrupulous photographer that is determined to get “The Picture” at any cost in the hope it will generate at least a 5-figure payment from one of the ridiculous gossip sheets …
These two feed off of each other … stop one you stop them both …
Can anyone say “Occupational Hazard”???
My feelings on the matter … Boo Freakin’ Hoo …
Well … it finall worked …
So, the one with the typo worked. Lucky you! (Good natured ribbing!)
Some enterprising inventor could make a fortune installing a mace spray port just above a camera lens operated by a button on the camera for when these “stars” want to act tough. The papparazzi are loonies, but so are most of the “stars” and/or their agents who feed them time, place and what they’ll be wearing so a photo or four will make the news.
I think we have missed the main point. Harrelson was allowed to breed.
I have mixed feelings about the paparazzi phenomenon. The protest-too-much stars often seek their attention by going to the same shops on Robertson Blvd., going to the same clubs, and going to the same restaurants. I’m sorry, if you’re known at all and you’re going to the Ivy at high noon, you want your picture taken.
But I draw the line at the frenzies that can endanger other people, like the time photographers chased Scarlett Johanssen by car all of the way to Anaheim or the time some jerks injured a kid while trying to get shots of Reese Witherspoon. If some celebs don’t want their children photographed, that ought to be respected. The only reason why the Suris, Shilohs, and other celebrity tots are out there at all is because their parents know somebody will try to get their pictures anyway.
happyscrapper … I guess I was in such a state of shock that it worked I couldn’t type … been that kind of a morning so far …
…
Which means he should be charged with TWO counts of assault…
sonofdy…paging sonofdy…
if only harrelson had been making a flik about vampires instead of zombies, the excuse would work. everyone knows the popparozzi are blood sucking leaches, and harrelson would have every right to kill these vampires as long as he staked them to the ground or dragged them into the sunlight. but since the attack occurred at night, staking was the only viable solution. perhaps he could use one of their camera tripod legs. seriously, since “personalities” forfeit their right to privacy from these slugs, popparrazzi should equally forfeit their right to not be assaulted. let’s put the field even again, cause my money would be on harrelson.
Woody Harrelson insisted for years that his father had nothing to do with the murder of the federal judge. There was a Mount Everest of evidence against Charles Harrelson and Woody had to be deliberately obtuse not to know in his heart that his father was a stone cold killer. The fact that he would go on denying it publicly was and remains a blot on Woody’s career. How much pain did that cause the judge’s family? If he was going to proclaim his dad’s innocence in the face of evidence that was more airtight than what came out in OJ Simpson’s civil trial, than how can he have credibility when he says he thought he was being attacked by zombies? If we were talking about a world renowned actor like Brando or Lawrence Olivier, who were known for their ability to totally immerse themselves in their characters, that would be one thing. But heck, Woody Harrelson is best known for playing a dimwit on Cheers.
Comment of the day…so far!
Wasn’t Woody’s best movie performance called “White Men Can’t Act” … I believe he got nominated for a Bozo B-Ball Award for that one …
…
Even when they work for Fox News?
lgm …
I know where you are headed and although there are differences in the direct comparison of the 2 situations I will agree there is a commonality in that in every situation there is a point that is reached at which it becomes an intrusion on the rights of an individual’s right to privacy …
I think that it also makes a difference as to whether it is in a private or public setting … that being said at that point of intrusion enough is enough and it needs to stop …
The situational difference I refer to is:
MOST of the time a reporter from Fox or any other formal news organization is looking for answers to questions …
These “celebrity” leech photographers are generally not working for any formal organization and are independent and only want pictures they can try to sell to the highest bidder … not answers to any questions …
This sounds like a defense dreamed up by the Obama Strategic Honesty Interpretation Team (great acronym btw)
“Oh no no no no, silly person. Obama wasn’t prostrating himself before a murderous tyrant, he was picking up a zombie.”
I think it will fly.
Heh, heh, heh, At least people will see it then. Not like burying it from sight by putting it on Chris Matthews show.
ZING!!!
FTW!!!
There is a difference between crapass morons stalking celebrities in order to make money…and a FOX News reporter trying to get an honest answer from a crapass moron who owes the American public an explanation. But of course, due to moral equivalence issues, lgm wouldn’t see the difference.
Hello all
Personnally, I do not see a problem here. ZOMBIES live among us. Just ask ACORN or big city politicians. I mean, the dead vote in every major city in the U.S. 105% of the registered voters in Philly voted. Detroit has 23k more voters than qualified ‘living’ people. Ergo, ZOMBIES, they must be real:-)
As anyone can attest, that has visited Capitol Hill, our Congress is full of ZOMBIES
The Teacher’s Union, yep, ZOMBIES. Why else would they protest ‘really’ educating children and being rewarded on the basis of their ability to teach. They want our children to be socialist uneducated ZOMBIES, just like them.
Been to the DMV lately? Yep, ZOMBIES
I could go on and on, but it is Saturday
Have a great day all 
So, what was the verdict at trial? If the photographer broke law so be it, still doesn’t justify battery, especially since the celebs live and die for the attention, they need to take the good with the bad it appears to me.
Woody Harrelson did 1 movie worth watching after he left Cheers, that would be White Men Can’t Jump, after that mostly class “b” movies IMHO. Obviously not a big fan, like most of America really liked the guy on cheers, think he became too dependent on “weed”, naaw, not habit forming right? BS!
That’s ironic, he’s walking stoned zombie and he’s attacked by a zombie, uh huh…have another drag Woody.
You could argue stimulus money is needed for more timely Zombie Alerts.
Of course the half kilo of Maui-Wowie he smoked in the bathroom after getting off the plane had absolutely NOTHING at all to do with it.
I’ll have to try that one, next time I get into a scrape.
I rarely disagree with either Michelle or her guest hosts….but I’m with the Paparazzi.
If the only indignity pampered, dimwitted Hollywood types have to suffer is some overbearing cameramen, all I have to say is….WAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!
Don’t want your privacy invaded? Go into a different line of work. Become a farmer. Get a real job of some type. I guarantee no annoying cameramen will follow you around.
If you want to continue to be treated like a demigod, though, make millions of dollars and have people fawn over you as if you were someone with a real talent as opposed to someone who was basically just lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time?
Suck it up and SAY CHEESE!
rit
On April 11th, 2009 at 12:07 pm, Marc said:
Woody Harrelson insisted for years that his father had nothing to do with the murder of the federal judge. There was a Mount Everest of evidence against Charles Harrelson and Woody had to be deliberately obtuse not to know in his heart that his father was a stone cold killer.
The Lawyer I spoke to said, he intentionally sought to get his Dad off, he didn’t think Woody cared that his father was guilty.
While I agree this is definitely a two-sided issue and a self-propagating incident, once the photographer crosses the boundary (If indeed he/she/it did) of physical contact or perceived endangerment to any of the people whom are being pursued, all bets are off and all citizens have a legal right (and obligation) to defend themselves and their families.
Just my two cents.
Is there even a market for Woody photos?
Zombies must have no concept of supply and demand.
Apparently zombie-ism is spread by Kool-Aid and/ or Flavor-Aid.
See?
Looks like they got chappy. Too bad. He was one of the good ones.