Punchline of the day

By Michelle Malkin  •  October 19, 2009 10:33 PM

Oh, crikey. I’m cramping up.

From.

Laughing so hard.

Ouch. Ow. Stop the pain!

The administration’s new two-pronged initiative, operating under a law passed by Congress last year, will consist of a bond purchase program to support new lending by these agencies, and a temporary credit and liquidity program to boost agency access to credit sources for their existing bonds.

The eventual size of the program will be set according to agency demand, but it does have a ceiling, said Michael Barr, Treasury’s assistant secretary for financial institutions, during a conference call with reporters this afternoon.

“The program levels are really being built from the ground up,” Barr said. “We need to have a much more refined sense of both demand and eligibility to determine the appropriate scaling of the program.”

Whatever the eventual size of the program, Barr said American taxpayers will be reimbursed through fees paid to Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, and the Department of the Treasury. All these agencies are major backers of mortgages.

“There will be strong taxpayer protections,” he said, adding that the “expected cost to the federal government is zero” because of these fees.

Another “temporary” housing entitlement with “strong taxpayer protections” and an “expected cost to the federal government” of “zero.”

Laughter turning to tears. Wealth redistribution is no joke.

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Comments


  1. #1
    On October 19th, 2009 at 10:51 pm, bjc said:

    *Hey P-BO, you want to help the hundreds of thousands of homeowners: Tell them to read the writing on the wall; It says “you can’t afford this house, so get out from under it and go rent somewhere until you are ready, and maybe spend less time on the couch watching Oprah and eating twinkies and more time out earning some serious coin”.

  2. #2
    On October 19th, 2009 at 10:55 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    Liquidity in Real Estate? Because the bubble wasn’t enough?

    These people are idiots.

  3. #3
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:02 pm, bjc said:

    *It has been said that “Government is a necessary evil”; I say “Government is evil”.
    *Reagan said about the Soviets, “Trust, but verify”; I say about most everyone in D.C., “Don’t trust, then verify why”.

  4. #4
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:11 pm, granite said:

    On October 19th, 2009 at 10:55 pm, AlohaGuy said:

    These people are idiots.

    They are dangerous, and arguably evil, lying idiots.

    Why don’t they just, “up front”, walk up to us, pee on us, and tell us it’s raining?

  5. #5
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:12 pm, Jet Jaguar said:

    Free the Free Market!

  6. #6
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:18 pm, nbarry said:

    My sources tell me that banks have gone back to writing mortgages without requiring income verification under certain conditions (high credit score, etc.) In other words, risky business as usual, with guess who picking up the tab?

  7. #7
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:19 pm, Truesoldier said:

    Barr said American taxpayers will be reimbursed through fees paid to Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, and the Department of the Treasury

    Ok so we are expected to believe that people that bought houses they could not afford to pay for are suddenly going to not only be able to pay their mortgages, but also pay these fees?

  8. #8
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:21 pm, graysonret said:

    Yeah, right. More BS from the national government.

  9. #9
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:21 pm, Truesoldier said:

    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:18 pm, nbarry said:

    Yep, heard the radio commercial today for some company called Weslend Financial that state that they can get you a mortgage without income verification.

  10. #10
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:27 pm, Flyoverman said:

    ….and I’ll respect you in the morning.

  11. #11
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:35 pm, On-my-soap-box said:

    Looks like Fannie Mae stock is headed for the $0.5 mark – again.

    Too bad I didn’t dump Freddie Mac on Friday. A simple day trade is gunna cost me thousands. Freddie is prolly headed back to $0.5 too.

    These two are the bastard children of the Dems. They will not ever let them die.

  12. #12
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:46 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    How many hundreds of trillions of dollars does Obama plan to pump into Freddie and Fannie and other failed financial institutions? How many dollars do the Chinese have anyway?

  13. #13
    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:54 pm, On-my-soap-box said:

    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:46 pm, WarEagle82 said:
    How many hundreds of trillions of dollars does Obama plan to pump into Freddie and Fannie and other failed financial institutions?

    How much can they keep from our paychecks – ummmmmmmmmmmm – your paychecks? I am in line at the soup kitchen on the Obummer plan of job creation.

    From Florida AWI:

    Florida’s September Employment Figures Released
    TALLAHASSEE – Florida’s seasonally adjusted unemployment rate for September 2009 is 11.0 percent. This represents 1,012,000 jobless out of a labor force of 9,193,000. The unemployment rate is up 0.2 percentage point from the revised August rate of 10.8 percent and is up 4.3 percentage points from the September 2008 rate.

    What is the national rate – 9.8%?

  14. #14
    On October 20th, 2009 at 12:15 am, jangar said:

    These two are the bastard children of the Dems. They will not ever let them die.

    This truth from the party that promotes a culture of death…no less.

    Hey Democrats…wanna do the American public a favor? Auto-abortion would be a positive step in the right direction.

  15. #15
    On October 20th, 2009 at 12:22 am, Reg.conservative said:

    Barr said American taxpayers will be reimbursed through fees paid to Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, and the Department of the Treasury

    Who is going to pay the fees?

  16. #16
    On October 20th, 2009 at 3:56 am, prendad said:

    LIBERAL TRANSLATION:
    We are going to borrow, beg and steal all the money we can. We are going to lie and lie and lie some more about what we are doing with the money because we really do not know wtf we are doing anyway. When all of this caves in on us, we will run and run and run away giving excuses and blaming Bush all the way out the door.

  17. #17
    On October 20th, 2009 at 6:32 am, conservativesRus said:

    On October 19th, 2009 at 11:18 pm, nbarry said:

    My sources tell me that banks have gone back to writing mortgages without requiring income verification under certain conditions (high credit score, etc.) In other words, risky business as usual, with guess who picking up the tab?

    I too understand that is again happening – but let’s not forget the environment in which the banks operate. They are implicitly forced to do so by the regulators. (ie – if you don’t write a certain number of loans in that neighborhood, we’ll…) Then the bank is told, “don’t worry, we’ll back you up” and then the government in fact did bail them out but with ever increasing strangling destructive strings. So once again, GOVERNMENT IS THE PROBLEM (not the banks).

  18. #18
    On October 20th, 2009 at 6:34 am, zorro said:

    Do these people think we are all uneducated ACORN “volunteers”?

  19. #19
    On October 20th, 2009 at 6:56 am, WarTip said:

    “There will be strong taxpayer protections,” he said, adding that the “expected cost to the federal government is zero” because of these fees.

    Of course the government cost is ZERO! Just like Dear Leader’s paycheck … EVERYTHING the gubmint does is paid for by WE THE PEOPLE!

    The first day the government ever produces ANYTHING that generates an income, please let me know. Until then, that’s my money you’re playing around with BUB!

    On October 20th, 2009 at 3:56 am, prendad said:

    LIBERAL TRANSLATION:
    We are going to borrow, beg and steal all the money we can. We are going to lie and lie and lie some more about what we are doing with the money because we really do not know wtf we are doing anyway. When all of this caves in on us, we will run and run and run away giving excuses and blaming Bush all the way out the door.

    Nope, they will keep printing and borrowing until it is worthless … once the economy crashes … “Game over man … GAME OVER!”

    Yet another crisis that need not go to waste, martial law to quell the protests (whether real or imagined) and voila … you have a complete takeover of a nation without ever firing a shot.

  20. #20
    On October 20th, 2009 at 7:46 am, Rob said:

    Game over man…

  21. #21
    On October 20th, 2009 at 8:24 am, tre said:

    and a temporary credit and liquidity program to boost agency access to credit sources for their existing bonds.

    The only thing more permanent than a temporary Government action is the word of God.

    “There will be strong taxpayer protections,” he said, adding that the “expected cost to the federal government is zero” because of these fees.

    “Trust me”, said the spider to the fly.

  22. #22
    On October 20th, 2009 at 8:25 am, cicerokid said:

    The first day the government ever produces ANYTHING that generates an income,

    Back in 1990, the Government seized the Mustang Ranch brothel in Nevada for tax evasion and, as required by law, tried to run it. They failed and it closed.

    Technically WarTip, this governmemnt venture did generate income and true to Fed form, was not profitable. Could not even manage a brothel! Perhaps they should have seeked counsel with ACORN first…

  23. #23
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:01 am, Rogue Cheddar said:

    Oh, crikey. I’m cramping up.

    Me too, I just can’t stay away from the Camembert, even if it is particularly runny. And as far as these temporary programs go, we all know they are permanent, just like their temporary insanity.

  24. #24
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:10 am, USMCgramma said:

    We have “temporary” taxes that never go away and what we “expect” doesn’t happen – when and how have taxpayers ever been reimbursed? They are a bunch of lying thieves.

    BHO knows the election in Afghanistan is about as legitimate as his.

  25. #25
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:11 am, CO2 Producer said:

    So like government-run health care, its cost is a magical type of crud that rolls sideways and disappears into some alternate dimension or something.

  26. #26
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:15 am, happyscrapper said:

    But…but…this will help those same people who were helped with the Cash for Clunkers program. You know, the people who got paid to trade in their completely good, paid-up cars in exchange for another car that will allow them to start making car payments again. Car payments that they can’t afford, so their new car will probably be reposessed. What part of stupid don’t they understand?

    On October 20th, 2009 at 3:56 am, prendad said:
    we will run and run and run away giving excuses and blaming Bush all the way out the door.

    They can run, but they can’t hide. These people are committing treason against my country. A lot of them will end up in prison.

  27. #27
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:18 am, happyscrapper said:

    On October 20th, 2009 at 6:56 am, WarTip said:Yet another crisis that need not go to waste, martial law to quell the protests (whether real or imagined) and voila … you have a complete takeover of a nation without ever firing a shot.

    Not going to happen. The second amendment guarantees that.

  28. #28
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:31 am, ArizonaNeanderthal said:

    “strong taxpayer protections”

    Oh Lord PLEASE protect me from my protectors!

    happyscrapper
    Not going to happen. The second amendment guarantees that.

    HateWatch of the Southern Poverty Law Center is Watching-Patriotism is Hate.

  29. #29
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:40 am, FruNobulux said:

    It’s all going to Obama’s plan. Debauch the currency, ruin the economy, make America weak. It’s becoming rather obvious now.

  30. #30
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:46 am, WarTip said:

    On October 20th, 2009 at 8:25 am, cicerokid said:

    The first day the government ever produces ANYTHING that generates an income,

    Back in 1990, the Government seized the Mustang Ranch brothel in Nevada for tax evasion and, as required by law, tried to run it. They failed and it closed.

    Technically WarTip, this governmemnt venture did generate income and true to Fed form, was not profitable. Could not even manage a brothel! Perhaps they should have seeked counsel with ACORN first…

    Believe it or not I worked for Joe when all that was going on. The actual history goes back a lot further and gets into some really nasty politics and a vindictive DA who was mad about Joe’s girls competing with his girls working downtown. (I did maintenance there so no, it is not what you may be thinking … and my wife worked as a maid there as well) There were some people who claimed (only somewhat jokingly) that the government had such a hard time because they were trying to run it by hand.

    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:18 am, happyscrapper said: Not going to happen. The second amendment guarantees that.

    No, I do not think so. There are enough truly apathetic and woefully ignorant (lacking of knowledge … not a derogatory commentary) people to allow the takeover. When that does happen, our Second Amendment will step up to the plate for the retaking of our country. While I would seriously like to believe that this could be avoided altogether … I (sadly) do not doubt that the tree of liberty will need to be watered within our lifetimes.

  31. #31
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:47 am, thetoysurgeon said:

    They will own your house in time, but you won’t be living in it.

  32. #32
    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:54 am, spaceycakes said:

    PT Barnum was right.

  33. #33
    On October 20th, 2009 at 10:41 am, battleaxe said:

    If you have 300 people in a room taking money from a bank, but only 100 of them working to put money into the bank, it won’t take long before there is either no bank or no one working to put money into the bank.

  34. #34
    On October 20th, 2009 at 11:01 am, cabrerski said:

    Back in 1980, I remember an article translated from Pravda. In the article, a Soviet minister had stated that inflation was found in the Soviet economy, but only because the People wanted it and had voted for its presence.

    Then…now…same government mindset, same bullcrap, same compliant media.

  35. #35
    On October 20th, 2009 at 11:30 am, yohannbiimu said:

    The only reason why our economy isn’t booming, our unemployment rate hasn’t dropped below 1%, and we haven’t entered a worker’s Utopia that every Marxist who ever lived have only dreamed of is because of neigh-sayers like Michelle Malkin, FAUX News, and radical right-wing talk/hate radio.

    sarcasm off/

    The pathology of this bunch of these psychotics is mind-boggling. It’s like they’re mentally retarded, clinically insane, AND demon-possessed all at once. But what is equally (at least so) dumbfounding is the fact that 90% of the “news” media and a large number of the so-called “opposition party” just let this crap slide by without the slightest scrutiny.

    Methinks that Obama will have to grant the “mainstream media” its own “stimulus package” in order to stay afloat, and perhaps a handful of “blue-dog” Democrats will have to join the GOP in order to give the illusion of an opposition party for the gullible, mind-numbed minions of The One.

  36. #36
    On October 20th, 2009 at 11:33 am, yohannbiimu said:

    On October 20th, 2009 at 9:01 am, Rogue Cheddar said:

    I just can’t stay away from the Camembert, even if it is particularly runny.

    I’m sad because I’ve been boycotting Venezuelan Beaver Cheese ever since Hugo Chavez took over…

  37. #37
    On October 20th, 2009 at 11:42 am, yohannbiimu said:

    On October 20th, 2009 at 10:41 am, battleaxe said:

    If you have 300 people in a room taking money from a bank, but only 100 of them working to put money into the bank, it won’t take long before there is either no bank or no one working to put money into the bank.

    I’m pretty sure that the banks will get flooded with bills printed so fast that the ink will still be running off of them–therefore, I think that employment will disappear before the banks do.

    The United States has so many people (I do not dignify them by calling them “citizens”) who have never had a moment’s pause to think about anything, that it’s no wonder when you encounter so many “Obama is trying to fix Bush’s mess, so give him a chance”-nimrods. It must not be in the water, because I drink the same water (nothing wrong with MY precious bodily fluids), so it must be the indoctrination they’ve gotten through public “education” and the “mainstream media.”

  38. #38
    On October 20th, 2009 at 11:42 am, swede said:

    So to fix the economic chaos, we need to revive the mortgage entitlements that caused the chaos in the first place, using the same institutions and idiots that had to be bailed out with our money, and the same taxpayer protections that didn’t prevent the disaster.

    Got it. Allrighty then. You have wonder if this has something to do with medical marijuana. Only with mind altering drugs, or some form of mental deficiency does this make any sense.

    “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. – Einstein

  39. #39
    On October 20th, 2009 at 12:28 pm, yohannbiimu said:

    “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. – Einstein

    That is one of my favorite quotes of all time. It is such a simple idea and easily grasped, that if everyone were told and explained it to them, they just MIGHT get the idea, and reject the stupidity that is happening beneath their noses. You’d think that at LEAST “educated journalists” would be able to understand it, and apply it to what is happening with the miscreants in government who are destroying this country.

  40. #40
    On October 20th, 2009 at 2:18 pm, RedDog said:

    I cannot speak because these knuckleheads have me permanently slack-jawed. I’m absolutely dumbstruck. It’s time for us peasents to take to the streets with our torches and pitchforks. Mix in some tar and feathers too.

  41. #41
    On October 20th, 2009 at 2:21 pm, RedDog said:

    We’ll be another Somalia when Little Man gets done with us.

  42. #42
    On October 20th, 2009 at 4:01 pm, prendad said:

    On October 20th, 2009 at 6:56 am, WarTip said:
    On October 20th, 2009 at 3:56 am, prendad said:

    LIBERAL TRANSLATION:
    We are going to borrow, beg and steal all the money we can. We are going to lie and lie and lie some more about what we are doing with the money because we really do not know wtf we are doing anyway. When all of this caves in on us, we will run and run and run away giving excuses and blaming Bush all the way out the door.
    Nope, they will keep printing and borrowing until it is worthless … once the economy crashes … “Game over man … GAME OVER!”

    Yet another crisis that need not go to waste, martial law to quell the protests (whether real or imagined) and voila … you have a complete takeover of a nation without ever firing a shot.

    I know, and I think that you know, that this administration, or any administration, will NEVER take over this country as long as citizens like me and (I assume) you have firearms in their safes and liberty in their hearts.

  43. #43
    On October 20th, 2009 at 5:36 pm, swede said:

    Nope, they will keep printing and borrowing until it is worthless … once the economy crashes … “Game over man … GAME OVER!”

    On that note, do you realize how much $$ they are printing? It is mind-boggling. The monetary supply has more than doubled in the last 9 months. Just my Econ 101 knowledge tells me the next step is hyper inflation. Inevitable. You can’t increase the money supply in a recessed economy and not deflate the dollar.

    But Turbo Tim surely knows this, right??!? Apparently not.

  44. #44
    On October 20th, 2009 at 8:25 pm, cheapseat said:

    IT’S ALL BUSHES’ FAULT! HE’S MAKING ME FORCE FREDDIE AND FANNIE TO GIVE HOME LOANS AGAIN TO A NEW CROP OF SUBPRIME BORROWERS. I INHERITED THE WORST ECONOMY IN 75 YEARS. BUSH LIED AND PEOPLE DIED! BLAH BLAH BLAH. THIS ECONOMY IS YOURS NOW, AFGHANISTAN IS YOURS, AND YOU BEING A BIG MOUTHED SPEECHIFYING DO NOTHING STUFFED SHIRT IS YOURS NOW ALSO. THE KING HAS NO CLOTHES.

  45. #45
    On October 20th, 2009 at 10:54 pm, prendad said:

    Empty vessel. Stuffed shirt. egomaniac. a##wipe.
    Washington Post Want Ad:

    Wanted:
    President, able to make decisions, lead the United States Of America. Apply to White House, 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Urgent, must fill immediately.

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