“My accomplishments are slight:” Happy National Post-Achievement Day!
In honor of President Barack Obama’s acceptance of the Nobel Peace Prize, I think we should declare today Happy National Post-Achievement Day.
What award or honor don’t you deserve? Claim it.
What unearned prize for unmet aspirations would you like to give yourself? Declare it.
Obama’s full speech is here. All you need to know:
I receive this honor with deep gratitude and great humility. It is an award that speaks to our highest aspirations – that for all the cruelty and hardship of our world, we are not mere prisoners of fate. Our actions matter, and can bend history in the direction of justice.
And yet I would be remiss if I did not acknowledge the considerable controversy that your generous decision has generated. In part, this is because I am at the beginning, and not the end, of my labors on the world stage. Compared to some of the giants of history who have received this prize – Schweitzer and King; Marshall and Mandela – my accomplishments are slight.
The theme song for the day from the brilliant Steven Crowder, who deserves a Nobel Prize for Literature, a Grammy, and an MTV music video award:
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Nobel prize for medicine.
You know, I can’t help but look at that picture of him holding the award n his hand, the medallion in the other and thinking that it looks like a 2nd Grade Spelling Bee award… taken in some cafeteria somewhere. It’s crooked, and I think shows lunch tables in the background. I wouldn’t doubt if pictures like this will be very, very rare as somewhere deep in the still-mortal crevices of TheOne’s mind…he HAS to know…”I don’t deserve this”. I almost feel bad for the ObamMessiah…
How about ‘non-existent’, chief.
Oh buddy, slap yourself on the back! Your accomplishments have been HUGE…killed the US economy, demoralized our military, managed to make everything about yourself, and you’re working on destroying our medical delivery system and energy usage. You could be world president!
The Oslo Peace Prize group is nothing more than a group of self-important, self-made, secular humanists who see nothing greater than those they share air with in the room.
I’ve always wanted to be a writer… I think I deserve a Pulitzer– you know, for the prize-winning literature I might-maybe-one day produce!
Could some one that knows more than me…check on the money thing…It seems to me that serving presidents cannot accept gifts, (awards?} over a certain value? Just a passing thought…no wait a minute The Obama is a Democrat and those laws only apply to republicans…Clinton and AlGore accepted rather large “gifts” of cash from the Chinese government. So I guess The Obama has no worries…never mind…what is Tiger up to anyway?…..
The thank you for coming prize.
I think I deserve a Grammy for:
Best New Artist; Song of the Year; Best Comedy Album; Best Country Song; Best Gospel Song; Best Gospel Vocal Performance; Male; Best Rock Gospel Album; Best Short Form Music Video; Best Rock Vocal Performance, Solo; Best Rock Album.
However, I do not deserve: Best Polka Album
Best Polka Album belongs to Weird Al Yankovic
Is this a moment for Michelle Obama to be proud again?
You realize FLOTUS was just named “most fascinating person” of 2009 by Barbara Wah-wah?
Speech translation:
“I am fisting my subjects for you”
funny…on the news this morning they noted other recipients as Nelson Mandela & Desmond Tutu.
No mention of Fredrik De Klerk (joint winner with Mandela), Yitzhak Rabin, Shimon Peres, Lech Walesa…
By the way, De Klerk should have been the sole recipient.
NOBEL WHAT??? I gave up on this SHAM with ARARAT… Then they gave the world ALGORE… About as useful as screen doors on a submarine…
“It is an award that speaks to our highest aspirations”. In other words, thanks for this award for all the great stuff that I am aspiring to do. . .real soon like.
“You’all done ejaculated a mouthful.”
- Moe (UNCIVIL WAR BIRDS, 1946)
(shudder) Wow! I just a chill up my blain!
You forgot Arafat and Gore, you poinyoin!
OK Obama, Just how do the tyrants that enslaved Afghanistan differ from the tyrants that enslaved Iraq and precisely what is your definition of a “just war”? This man is nothing but empty rhetoric and is the epitome of a flimflam man.
That’s not true…I bought many of your albums…for me and to give as gifts. Nothing says party like plymouth on the stereo.
Sure sounds a lot like the Obamination of deslotaion to me.
Blah blah blah. . .empty shell, nobody home.
Typical white people, probably bitter clingers too.
Got lederhosen?
I would’ve had more respect if he had just said “I receive this honor with deep gratitude and great humility yada yada yada.”
Adding, “This is but the end of the beginning.” (Sorry, Churchill)
LOL! I LOVES me some Crowder! And CapitalistPig, that’s EXACTLY what I thought when I saw the picture. I can just hear him saying “Hey, can we put this on the fridge?”
LOL
Thanks… now I just need to learn the accordion.
Hey, Obama! You DON’T lie!
This from Drudge this am. When, oh when, will the peace begin? Is this the way peacemakers behave?
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/dec/09/obama-nobel-peace-prize-snub
I took an aspirin last night — you can FedEx my Nobel for Medicine to me.
Here’s a rather truthful look at past presidents and the Nobel Peace Prize.
It says plenty.
Well Norway, feel free to keep him. He’s all yours.
Oops…no bowbow here!
I only used one square this morning! (That’s cuz the kids used all the rest and didn’t put on another roll, the twerps!) I want my Sheryl Crowe ‘TP or not TP’ award!
He really didn’t get the peace prize. NASA faked it.
If you in-large the picture in the lower left hand corner by the power of one thousand,you will see what looks like the letter H. Clearly that proves the picture was taken in Houston.
“…as is my committment to defend the Constitution of the United States.”
I think I should be given the Millenium prize for proving the Swinnerton-Dyer Conjecture.
Of course, I have done no such thing, but I really, really, want to, and who knows, maybe my wanting it so badly would be enough to inspire the person who actually could do it. So, therefore, I deserve the prize.
Michelle, good job on Fox News this morning.
I always enjoy listening to you because you bring different specific points to the argument rather than the same same same same stuff. Also, you use facts not just “dems are evil”, “dems want us all to become socialists” rhetoric that turns off common folk.
Keep it up.
Every “special” President deserves a medal!
I just pulled a Barack!
Readin’ these comments
That’s a PEACE PRIZE!
I wonder how much money the Nobel Committee was paid to give this award to Obama.
Rumor is he has been pre-selected to win his second prize in 2010.
For watching The Sands of Iwo Jima,The Dirty Dozen, and The Longest Day, I claim a Congressional Medal of Honor.
For acting in my high school play 25 years ago (Goodness! Has it been that long!?) I claim my long-overdue Tony Award.
For singing in my Church, I claim my Grammy Award.
For all of my speeding tickets, I claim my NASCAR Sprint Cup Championship.
For, well, just for being the incomparable Tre, I claim my Congressional Medal of Freedom!
FLOTUS should win best in show prize.
But then the Dead White Mens’ Bill Of Negative Rights has been a thing of scorn for the Progressive/Community Organizer for over a century now. Mere Constitutions, laws and promises shall not be a hindrance to the Progressive/Community Organizer/street hustler/Academic Nit Wit and such shall it?
I drove past Lambeau Field one time when I was in Wisconsin. Doesn’t that qualify me for the Lombardi Trophy? Maybe they should throw in a Heizman for good measure since I went to college at one time, too.
Michelle invited and I have no shortage of unmet aspirations, so I’m happy to share my very brief NPP acceptance speech:
It is with deepest humility and what would be a great sense of uneasiness if our illustrious leader hadn’t paved the way for me that I, HappyMom, do accept the Homemaker of the Millennium Award.
I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge that there is some small controversy about my accepting this award, but hey, I’m trying, right? I’m sure there will come a day when my family isn’t frantically looking for keys, shoes, and pants 3 minutes after we’re supposed to be somewhere else. There will also come a day when the anguished cries of “honey, where are my ______________” and the frustrated response of “Look under . . . stuff! Look under!” and are no longer heard in the spotless halls of my humble abode. I feel confident that in future years no one will ever have found me washing the same load 5 times because I was, well, too busy looking under stuff to remember to change it.
Thank you, world, for recognizing my awesome potential. Next year, let’s talk about my ultra-amazing ability to still fit into my college jeans!
“my achievements are
slightnon-existant.”“my achievements are
slightfabricated at best.”“my achievements are
slightdestroying America.”I, I, me, my, I, me, me, me, I, me, my, me, I, I, me.
Barak “me monster” Obama
Dividing by zero? That’s a paddlin’
WHOOOOO!! Hand my co-worker a Nobel Prize in Chemistry for that one!!
*CHOKE!! GAG!!*
At first glance I thought his left hand was holding a personalized coffee mug, would have been just as relevant.
can’t top that one! but I did stay in a holiday express once…
I deserve a Peabody for my last post.
I thought she only “placed”, even though nobody else showed up?
Got to love how Obama can say this:
in the paragraph before saying this:
If Obama had any true humility he would have declined to accept the prize based on the fact that he has not accomplished anything to date other than picking a dog (maybe that was what his Nobel Prize was really for).
I’m sure the next one will be from the Porn Producers Guild for …um, “having relations” with our country.
If that head (ego) of his grows any larger it will bust like an over-ripe watermelon.
He didn’t…Tedd did.
Let’s be fair…Joe Biden is not here to defend himself.
I caught their act at the Bellagio a couple of years ago.
I think we all deserve an award for restrained rage. Has the question ever been answered regarding who nominated Obama? He keeps saying it was a surprise.
By his own admission the award was the result of nothing he has accomplished as president, so why did he feel the need to make a personal appearance to accept it and stick tax payers w/ the hefty bill?
Was it Dick Morris on Bill-O last night said that Obummer would have been well-served to send a war widow to Oslo instead?
As Obama is accepting his prize, the Soviets launch a new type ICMB over his head. Sweet !
How is that workin out for ya?
As the great Paolo Garbanzo says (http://www.garbanzojuggling.com/):
When a fire juggler sets himself on fire, he becomes very very selfish – only thinking of me, me, me.
“Help ME! I’m on fire! Put ME out!”
I think Obama is on fire.
[No! Not the boots!]
Met Office, which has spent four days collecting signatures. The initiative is a sign of how worried it is that e-mails stolen from the University of East Anglia are fueling skepticism about man-made global warming at a critical moment in talks on carbon emissions.
One scientist said that he felt under pressure to sign the circular or risk losing work. The Met Office admitted that many of the signatories did not work on climate change..
MEANWHILE GEARING UP FOR THE PRESIDENT’S TRIP TO HOPENHAGEN OR CARBONHAGEN, THERE APPEARS TO BE A MARKETING CAMPAIGN UNDERWAY
“It’s The Marketing Stupid”
The scariest part of the speech is that He thinks He’s at the beginning of his gig on the world stage, not the end! Not if we can help it.
Seeing that shiny new “grill” he flashes in this video, I would throw in a JD Powers “Car of the Year” award too.
We now have weird lights in the skies over Norway. Sign of the apocalypse? Aliens coming to return the Peace Prize Committee home after being a 5th column successfully for years? You be the judge!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1234430/Mystery-spiral-blue-light-display-hovers-Norway.html
The video was KICK ASS! I swear, if this was played on the radio or MTV it REALLY would win an award! The stupid libs would be calling in the song to every radio station if they didn’t know it was a Conservative “hit piece”.
-Word to ya Mutha
His accomplishments are, er, nill.
I won a trophy once for ski racing. Actually, I crashed halfway down the course, got up put my skis back on and finished. Ski races are usually decided by 100ths of a second, and my time was 30 seconds off the pace…but I was the only racer in my age group so was presented with a big shiny trophy and applause. After sitting in my office for a day or two, it ended up in a box and ultimately the dumpster.
Hopefully, every time Barry looks at his Nothing Peace Prize he will be reminded of his hypocrisy.
Yet another historic speech full of eloquence and inspiration that will be forgotten within 3 days without anybody being able to quote a single line. Just like every other eloquent, inspirational historic speech he has made.
Shouldn’t that have been “Pre-achievement”?
If the Norwegian light show is indeed aliens, they can have Obama.
“It’s a cookbook!”
Victor Davis Hanson counted 40 “I’s” in Obama’s speech.
And once again, an ally is tossed under the bus as Obama snubs the King of Norway. I guess if you’re a white monarch, Obama has no time to bow to you.
note to lib trolls:
That was not a threat to El Presidente, it was geek humor. /paranoia /sarc
I now anxiously await my Nobel Prize for Literature.
I’d call this a sign of progress — the delusional, malignant narcissist finally taking his first baby-step toward coming to terms with reality — if I believed that he wrote those words himself.
And where is Kanye when we need him?
Editors note:
Skræling in modern Norwegian means weakling.
Nice shot.
…(ring, ring, ring….) excuse me I have to take this call. ‘Hello, yes, yes… No, No No! Send 30,000 troops not 13,000. Ok, gotta go – getting my Peace Prize.”
In a perfect world…Obama would have accepted his prize and dedicated it to our troops. The real peace makers of the world. They die for peace and freedom. Who more could be more deserving. A girl can dream….
Another lofty dream I have, PALIN 2012!
Ha – I’m making TWO sandwiches…Peace Prize. Yay for me!
The Big ear barry presidency may be the greatest boost to the image of the Bush Presidency
This buffoon is an embarrassment
His perpetual looking over and down at the crowd is ridiculous. These liberals have more personality affects and quirks than any group in history
As for the peace prize, wait till Gigantor pitches that thing at him when she sees the new female crew members on Air Force One
Tiger Woods Redux
I give myself an award for modesty. I don’t think I’ve done that much to deserve the prize, either. And I definitely think I’m more modest than Obama…. or his wife. And BTW, I’ve been proud of my country a lot longer.
Thank you, it is with great humility I accept the Nobel Prize for Physics. It may not seem like much to some, but I’ve noticed the earth cools off during the winter months. I hope this brings solace to the grieving Dumpster Muffins of the world. Speaking of muffins, I hear you Norwegians make a fine Danish…
He was against the war before he was for it.
Well, still against it, but have to do it anyway.
Bring in some troops – I need a photo op.
No shock at all that he canceled so much of his trip and turned down the invitation from the king.
He got his bling, and that’s all that matters to him.
So BHO did the “gimmie my prize – see you later suckers” routine. No lunch with the King of Norway or any other post prize activities. Way to go Nobel committee! Your prize has been rendered irrelevant by awarding the prize to a malignant narcissist with a vision for the world.
Received in an email:
Many of us voted carefully, but many others got the “Pulletsurprise”.
If it was the King of Saudi Arabia he’d be flat on the floor.
Probably embarassment. Norwegians are pretty good at detecting posers.
Rahm: “Let’s swoop into Oslo, grab our bling, slink off to Copenhagen before they catch on to our scam.”
Definitely the prize should go to the American soldiers. They go where they are needed to help people in need; they die and are maimed and scarred for an ungrateful world. The leaders of the countries they die in are corrupt and steal the money we send there to help their people. Many of the people are convinced we are there to take their land and yet our soldiers continue to battle on. The leaders are not dying for these causes, including Obama. It is the American soldier who truly shows where pride and heart stand on the line. To them should go the honors and all praise.
Or the emperor of Japan.
Obama just hates white people, the same as his carefully chosen family preacher of 20 years, Jeremiah Wright.
Obama didn’t bow to the British Queen, and he certainly wasn’t going to bow to some pasty Norwegian clown. But after all of the press on his other bows, it would have seemed kind of weird for him to not do it.
In the Reverend Wright World View whites of European ancestry are the warmongering oppressors of the world, keepers and beneficiaries of the “white power structure.” Their traditional rulers should be spat upon, not bowed to.
did anyone else hear about how he was going to spend the $$ award? The news this a.m. mentioned some bull$hite about giving it to the same ‘charity’ his dear mother worked for…
Cant stand O’Drama, but I think he handled this awkward situation as best as he could.
spaceycakes said:
CAIR?