Did You Know...

Machete: Coming in September, it’s sure to be the best anti-Arizona immigration law movie — and anti-law movie for that matter — that your tax dollars can subsidize:

The film, originally based on a largely satirical mock-trailer inserted into Rodriguez & Taratino’s Grindhouse, has expanded into full production, and developed a message that many have criticized as glorifying a race war. Among those critics are two anonymous crew members from the production– who happen to be Hispanic– that came forward to warn Alex confidentially about the upsetting script. Further, two individuals who were privy to early screenings of ‘Machete’ have warned that the film is far more racially inflammatory than either the trailer or leaked script have indicated.

So the movie came to fruition in a Snakes on a Plane kind of way, except that more snakes on the plane have actually read the Arizona immigration law than members Obama’s Justice Department who are criticizing it.

I’d heard that this movie was in the works some time ago, but I hadn’t seen what loosely passes for a trailer until last night. Robert Deniro plays a character who’s obviously supposed to be a Sheriff Joe Arpaio type (except he’s a congressman), but based on the fact that Machete isn’t in jail and wearing pink underwear, the producers way overdid it on the artistic license (Language warning):

Welcome to post-racial America!

I think it’s safe to go ahead and give this a “10-plus” on behalf of full-time movie critic and fuller-time moron Roger Ebert, don’t you?

I’m still trying to figure out if Lindsay Lohan was supposed to be in the movie or if she just wandered onto the set. As you can tell by the line “We didn’t cross the border, the border crossed us,” Jessica Alba is portraying Malcolm X’s mentally-challenged step-granddaughter, Lolita X.

Insiders have also told me that Sean Penn was offered a part but had to turn it down because he’s in Venezuela filming Milk II: The Hugo Years.

The cruel irony is that, if you’re opposed to the Arizona immigration law and go to see Machete, they will check your papers:

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