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Friendly Advice for Alvin Greene

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By Doug Powers  •  June 11, 2010 01:36 PM

**Written by guest-blogger Doug Powers

So far, I like Democrat Senate candidate Alvin Greene, because he doesn’t really say much, and, as a result, I believe him.

Greene was the surprise winner in the Democrats’ South Carolina Senate primary, getting 59% of the vote, and, if a few unresolved legal issues are sorted out, he’ll face Jim DeMint in November — or not, whatever. Greene doesn’t seem too concerned either way.

Rarely do we stumble across a candidate like Alvin Greene, who can actually relate to the issues ordinary Americans face — unemployment and financial troubles — while at the same time possessing qualities and experiences that could make him a perfect fit with Congress and a useful advisor on issues relating to the SEC: A looming felony charge and an alleged affinity for Internet porn.

It seems like more people, especially Democrats, would be celebrating Greene’s historic win:

Greene won the contest with 59 percent of the vote and is now the first African American major-party U.S. Senate nominee in South Carolina since Reconstruction.

But no, instead, South Carolina Rep. Jim Clyburn has called for an investigation, claiming Greene might be a GOP plant:

House Majority Whip James Clyburn (D-S.C.) articulated the suspicion of many South Carolina Democrats this morning by suggesting that the state’s Democratic U.S. Senate primary victor Alvin Greene was a “plant.”

Greene, who is unemployed and lives with his mother, was the come-from-nowhere winner Tuesday after earlier paying $10,400 to register as a candidate and then seemingly disappearing from view. On Wednesday, the state’s Democratic leaders called on him to drop out of the race after it was revealed he has a felony obscenity charge pending against him for having allegedly shown a University of South Carolina undergraduate Internet porn and made “statements of going to the victim’s room,” according to the arrest warrant.

If convincing people that Greene’s candidacy is a lie doesn’t work, Clyburn might claim that Greene was the Tea Partier who was hurling racial slurs at him during the health care protest.

Here’s Keith Olbermann interviewing Greene last night, if you want to call it that. This interview is the political equivalent of “bay-see-ball been beddy beddy good to me,” but oddly enough, when I watch Mr. Greene, I don’t feel nearly as lied to as I do after listening to the run-of-the-mill Democrat. Greene could have easily won over Olbermann by calling Bush a nazi, but he took the high road instead and didn’t say… anything:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

“Alvin Greene: Obama without the teleprompter” — start making the t-shirts.

My first piece of advice for Greene is this: Don’t change a thing. By saying virtually nothing, you’ve got the media more frustrated than the time Chris Matthews ran out of Puffs Plus during Obama’s inauguration speech, and the more frustrated they get, the more free press you get.

Second piece of advice: The next time a pasty talking head from a lily white network asks you how you got $10,000, get right in his or her face, and as loudly and as uncharacteristically for you as possible, yell, “Why? If a black man has some money it means he stole it?”

Maybe Alvin’s just waiting for the White House to call and make him an offer to drop out of the race. Hang in there, Mr. Greene! One way or another, I have a feeling you’ll have a job soon.

**Written by guest-blogger Doug Powers

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