Baltimore Food Police Write First Ticket

By Doug Powers  •  October 27, 2010 10:03 AM

**Written by Doug Powers

null

Conversation coming soon to a prison cell near you:

“What are you in for?”

“Grand theft auto. You?”

“Butter.”

BALTIMORE — The Baltimore City Health Department issued its first environmental citation for repeat violations of the city’s trans fat ban.

The Health Department issued Healthy Choice, a food facility in the 400 block of Lexington Street, a $100 fine on Thursday.

“It was the second time they were found with a high trans fat level in their ingredients,” said Health Department agent Juan Gutierrez.

Officials said that during inspections in July and this month, the facility was found to be using a margarine product with trans fat levels in excess of what the law allows.

A source tells me the Health Department stormtroopers are referring to this particular type of crime as “a salt & fattery.”

Baltimore’s “Commissioner of Health” (you can’t make this stuff up), Dr. Oxiris Barbot (you certainly can’t make that up), is quoted as saying this (accent added by me for more appropriate Eastern Bloc effect): “Vile vee are pleased vis zee high rates of compliance veev seen since zee ban tuke effekt, vee vill continue to sankshun beeznesses zaht repeatedly fail to komply.”

Join me in standing up to these people and yelling at the top of our lungs, “From my cold, dead frying pan!”

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe

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Comments


  1. #101
    On October 27th, 2010 at 3:47 pm, Common Sense said:

    Probably one reason kids are fat these days is they don’t climb enough trees. (Or run and jump and swim and tip cows.) In urban areas, few opportunities, and in the burbs, neurotic mothers. So they sit inside and expand.

    The helicopter parents in our upper middle class neighborhood DRIVE their kids the 2 blocks to the bus stop, regardless of the weather and the fact that there is practically NO crime. You rarely see kids out playing – no basketball, not at the park, no catch, nothing. It’s very sad.

  2. #102
    On October 27th, 2010 at 3:47 pm, chapoutier said:

    And if you persist on maintaining that cigarettes have been outlawed in public places, by all means, keep stating so. The more emphatically, the better.

    Oh do tell? Are you resting your argument on the fact that I said they banned “cigarettes” instead of saying they banned “smoking cigarettes”? Please tell me that is it. I’m begging you.

  3. #103
    On October 27th, 2010 at 4:03 pm, spaceycakes said:

    I wondered how long it would take to get around to cigarettes…
    BAH!

  4. #104
    On October 27th, 2010 at 4:32 pm, Rogue Cheddar said:

    On October 27th, 2010 at 1:36 pm, spaceycakes said:
    PAT =
    spaceycakes on Rogue’s jelly

    I’m picturing that right now. (leans back in chair with wistful expression)

  5. #105
    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:21 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    My point was that the City of Baltimore has banned the sale of trans fats in certain venues while the sale of cigarettes, a far more lethal item, remain on sale and perfectly legal throughout the city. In fact, the City and state profit from the sale of cigarettes.

    Of course, dear, dear Chappy, in typical, knee-jerk fashion, ignored the point and attempted to insult me. But, then, what else would anyone expect from a typical, knee-jerk lefty?

    At least it only took him 47 minutes to realize it. But, for poor old Chappy, 47 minutes ain’t half bad.

  6. #106
    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:31 pm, spaceycakes said:

    leans back in chair with wistful expression

    yuo’re full of wist again? Must have been those radishes at lunch!

  7. #107
    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:32 pm, spaceycakes said:

    d’oh.

    should be ‘you’re’

  8. #108
    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:34 pm, CO2 Producer said:

    Re: Oxiris’ quote–funny stuff, Doug.

    Is it safe?

  9. #109
    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:34 pm, chapoutier said:

    My point was that the City of Baltimore has banned the sale of trans fats in certain venues while the sale of cigarettes, a far more lethal item, remain on sale and perfectly legal throughout the city. In fact, the City and state profit from the sale of cigarettes.

    Are you totally insane? You can walk into any supermarket in any aprt of town and buy as many trans fats as you want. Just as you can buy cigarettes. In fact, the City and State profit from the sale of trans fats.

    The USE of both of the products is restricted in places the governement can regulate, like restaurants and not regulated in places they can’t, like your home.

    So it is absolutlely asinine for you to claim cigarettes (or cigarrete smoking, whatever floats your boat) are not “outlawed” and trans fats are when the way in which they are regulated is actually very, very similar.

    Either you don’t understand the trans fat ban very well, and in which case you should probably just shut up, or you are totally inconsistent in your criteria for what constitutes “outlawing.” In which case you should probably just shut up as well.

  10. #110
    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:52 pm, txvet2 said:

    On October 27th, 2010 at 2:54 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    Leading Causes of Death

    Hate to quibble with your source, but it omitted abortion – around 1 million deaths yearly in this country.

  11. #111
    On October 27th, 2010 at 6:09 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    Geez, glad to see Chappy remains committed to knee-jerk reactions. It is kind of funny.

    He just won’t take the time to read my actual posts.

    Again, what else would you expect from a knee-jerk lefty…

    And it is nice to see that, again, as is typical of lefties, since he doesn’t understand what I actually posted, he thinks I should just shut up…

    Well done, Chappy. Thanks for proving your intolerant, ignorant lefty credentials again and again. Bravo!

  12. #112
    On October 27th, 2010 at 6:13 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    For some reason, the CDC doesn’t list abortions in their death figures. I guess their friends at Planned Parenthood and NOW would find that objectionable.

    Of course, we all know how meaningful government statistics are.

    For the record, the number of abortions is still probably closer to 1.2 million a year. Kinda dwarfs those 30,000 trans fat deaths but don’t tell Chappy…

    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:52 pm, txvet2 said:

    On October 27th, 2010 at 2:54 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    Leading Causes of Death

    Hate to quibble with your source, but it omitted abortion – around 1 million deaths yearly in this country.

  13. #113
    On October 27th, 2010 at 6:16 pm, chapoutier said:

    he doesn’t understand what I actually posted,

    Oh no. I understand quite nicely. It is not terribly clever or sophisitcated. But I am actually having doubts as to whether YOU actually understand what you wrote, your addled, schizo mind being what it is, so let me sum it up:

    You claim that if government is in the business of regulating what kills us, since cigarette smoking kills more people than trans fats, government should lay off trans fats until they deal with smoking, ignoring (or being ignorant of, so hard to tell sometimes) the fact that very similar restrictions (dealing with use in public rather than on sale or private consumption) on smoking have been in place well before the trans fat regulation, thus obviating your original point, which wasn’t much of one to begin with.

  14. #114
    On October 27th, 2010 at 6:20 pm, coffee said:

    All I can say is, Maryland, if you don’t like it, stop electing idiots. Seriously.

  15. #115
    On October 27th, 2010 at 6:30 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    Once again, Chappy proves he’d rather attack me that read what I said. Way to go, Chapster! Keep it up!

  16. #116
    On October 27th, 2010 at 6:37 pm, spaceycakes said:

    All I’m sayin’ is I want to smoke my cigarettes and eat butter.

    I’ve got it! Outlaw cilantro! ewww.

  17. #117
    On October 27th, 2010 at 7:01 pm, chapoutier said:

    I’ve got it! Outlaw cilantro! ewww.

    Oh. You’re one of THOSE people? A cilantro hater?

  18. #118
    On October 27th, 2010 at 7:37 pm, spaceycakes said:

    oh yes, remember? I hate cilantro and love anise.

    I get shivers even thinking about the taste of cilantro. Oh, and I detest tamarind.

  19. #119
    On October 27th, 2010 at 8:26 pm, Rogue Cheddar said:

    Why can’t they pick on things like liverwurst and broccoli?

  20. #120
    On October 27th, 2010 at 9:38 pm, WarEagle82 said:

    I happen to like liverwurst and broccoli. But give them time and they’ll have you eating cardboard and sand…

    On October 27th, 2010 at 8:26 pm, Rogue Cheddar said:

    Why can’t they pick on things like liverwurst and broccoli?

  21. #121
    On October 27th, 2010 at 10:47 pm, Republicanvet said:

    On October 27th, 2010 at 5:34 pm, chapoutier said:

    The USE of both of the products is restricted in places the governement can regulate, like restaurants and not regulated in places they can’t, like your home.

    Yet. I am sure there are sniveling control freaks on the left all over the country scheming on how to regulate this in private homes.

    Question for you Chap. Can you explain why the left is always so fanatically rabid about smoking and now trans fats while at the same time supporting abortion?

    Or like Urkel, partial birth abortion?

  22. #122
    On October 27th, 2010 at 11:18 pm, TigerLady said:

    Can you explain why the left is always so fanatically rabid about smoking and now trans fats while at the same time supporting abortion?

    Crickets.

  23. #123
    On October 27th, 2010 at 11:56 pm, chapoutier said:

    No crickets.

    They are two entirely different things. Why don’t you ask me to compare three apples to a leisure suit instead? Has about as much relevance.

  24. #124
    On October 28th, 2010 at 3:03 am, txvet2 said:

    On October 27th, 2010 at 11:56 pm, chapoutier said:

    No crickets.

    They are two entirely different things.

    True. There is very little in the way of actual substantive evidence that trans fats directly cause death, and likewise nothing (that I’ve ever seen or heard of) that proves that nicotine in small doses leads directly to death, (although of course both have been linked to diseases or physical conditions that can in some cases eventually cause death). Abortion, on the other hand, is directly and immediately virtually 100% lethal. In addition, the consumption of trans fats and nicotine is 100% voluntary, while abortion is 100% involuntary (on the part of the victim, that is). I can see why you would be so adamantly in favor of the imposition of bans on the former and unconcerned about the latter. You’re a leftist, after all.

  25. #125
    On October 28th, 2010 at 5:52 am, ArizonaNeanderthal said:

    On October 27th, 2010 at 11:56 pm, chapoutier said:

    No crickets.

    They are two entirely different things. Why don’t you ask me to compare three apples to a leisure suit instead? Has about as much relevance.

    Chappy in a leisure suit-I can see it now.

  26. #126
    On October 28th, 2010 at 9:16 am, Mostly Annoyed said:

    This is the baltimore, whose residents are referred to as “Balti-morons” by the rest of the state, whose mayors use corrupt and insane policies to gain votes and have made the city a horrible place to live, raise a family or even visit. People are ticketed for “loitering” when they obey the law and go outside a bar to smoke, yet drug dealers and prostitutes on the same block are ignored. No one has complained about the smokers, however they frequently complain about the drug dealers and prostitutes. People are attacked on city busses and the driver is not allowed to even report the crime, or get involved in any way.
    Now they are fining for too much trans fat? DUH!!!! If you can think of a stupid way to react to any situation, Baltimore is doing it. The current Gov of Maryland was mayor of Baltimore, and got elected because he has a band and for fundraisers he took his shirt off and played and sang…. And the girls (and a few guys, I’m sure) giggled and screamed, and elected another charismatic moron….. This is Maryland, where you can become Gov by being the worst Mayor in history….

  27. #127
    On October 28th, 2010 at 9:18 am, chapoutier said:

    There is very little in the way of actual substantive evidence that trans fats directly cause death

    Yeah, hardly anything at all except a groundbreaking, peer reviewed study in the most prestigeous medical journal in the country.

  28. #128
    On October 28th, 2010 at 9:20 am, chapoutier said:

    and unconcerned about the latter.

    This is not true at all. But whatever helps to keep your delusions and narrative afloat, I suppose.

  29. #129
    On November 4th, 2010 at 2:05 am, Danceswithdachshunds said:

    Sheesh, you’d think they’d just tax transfats and use the extra revenue for … ‘the children’.

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