The no-grope list: Look who gets a junk-touching exemption
Don’t squeeze the J-Nap.
You’ve heard of the “no-fly” list.
Now get a load of the no-grope list — a roster of the privileged federal officials and politicians who don’t have to be subjected to TSA’s grabby hands.
Lucky them, huh?
Cabinet secretaries, top congressional leaders and an exclusive group of senior U.S. officials are exempt from toughened new airport screening procedures when they fly commercially with government-approved federal security details.
Aviation security officials would not name those who can skip the controversial screening, but other officials said those VIPs range from top officials like Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner and FBI Director Robert Mueller to congressional leaders like incoming House Speaker John Boehner, who avoided security before a recent flight from Washington’s Reagan National Airport.
The heightened new security procedures by the Transportation Security Administration, which involve either a scan by a full-body detector or an intimate personal pat-down, have spurred passenger outrage in the lead-up to the Thanksgiving holiday airport crush.
But while passengers have no choice but to submit to either the detector or what some complain is an intrusive pat-down, senior government officials can opt out if they fly accompanied by government security guards approved by the TSA.
DHS Secretary Clownitano regularly bypasses security since she travels almost exclusively on government or military planes. Same with AG Eric Holder. ICE head John Morton travels commercial with a security detail and skips the screenings and pat-downs, AP also reports.
DHS motto: Homeland security waivers for we, but not for thee. Now, submit or pay up!
***
Commenter Spare Change says below that this is a step in the right direction of common-sense profiling.
But commenter johnsteele counters: “Does this mean that all of us who went through fingerprinting and FBI criminal background checks to get a Florida Concealed Weapons Permit are now exempt? Didn’t think so, groping is for the little people.”
See what others have said
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Categories: Airline Security,Homeland Security,Political Correctness,Politics
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Errah I’m going to the airport in a burqua over my gatorade filled Depends adult diaper. I’ll be carrying a Baby Ruth and a pocket constitution in my depends and a cheap bottle of wine in my carry on for TSM (Transportation and Security Molester) Thinks of that scene in Sleepless in Seattle when I’m getting my full frontal travel massage and happy ending!
Seems to me that the very people who are exempt from the pat downs are the very people who need to be patted down….on their way to jail!
Of course Timmy Geithner is on the list. He doesn’t pay taxes, why should he have to be groped by TSA?
we could use bomb sniffing dogs but we wouldn’t want to offend the terrorists. . .. er Muslims
I think any government official excempt from the screenings should have to dress in toga and sandals. They should travel by sedan chair.
These Patrician bastards are above the law in every common venture.
Okay, since we are now profiling, let’s add frequent fliers, children, and elderly to that list. We’ve now eliminated more than half of all travelers. I’m sure we can build that list to over 99% of people who fly in no time. Now who does that leave? Yeah, that’s the problem. We already know who but aren’t allowed to speak the name of the enemy.
I think Pelosi should be on the must grope list.
Above the law again.
Before everyone gets their knickers in a twist about “privilege”, stop to consider: this might actually be a step in the right direction.
Think about it: to “profile” correctly, you have to start by eliminating putatively “trustworthy” people from the random searching (yeah, I know, who ever said politicians were trustworthy, but you get my point).
Next, we should start exempting people with security clearances and other forms of institutional trust that are based on reliable background checks.
After that, we can get down to the harder work of creating profile parameters that truly identify the “at risk” travelers without harassing the “no/low risk” travelers.
Naw … that would make too much sense…
And before anyone else says it — “just as long as your knickers weren’t already twisted by TSA…”
Does this mean that all of us who went through fingerprinting and FBI criminal background checks to get a Florida Concealed Weapons Permit are now exempt?
Didn’t think so, groping is for the little people.
How about all Active, Reserve and Guard Component, and Retired Military?
Everyone in JPAS?
I thought profiling was supposed to be a good thing.
I have not mentioned it before, but I recently traveled from OKC to DEN to LAX to HON with a straight razor in my carry-on.
It was a mistake on my part, a product of hurrying to make the flight. On the outbound flights, it was in my checked baggage.
Point is, regardless of being frisked, the TSA screeners failed to detect my straight razor, which I shave with, in my carry-on bag. I’m no expert, but I believe some would consider it a weapon.
I’d certainly include anyone with a security clearance, they’ve been background checked up the wazoo.
They must’ve been inspied by that ESPN “It’s good to have a Super Bowl Ring” commercial — the one where people like Terry Bradshaw are breezing through airport security and being handed glasses of champagne while in the next line over everybody else is getting put up against the wall.
“It’s good to be King — or one of the King’s sucklings.”
So who knew that Joe Biden wrote the Patriot Act in 1995?
If I show up at the airport with a fake ID for Taliban commander Mullah Akhtar Muhammad Mansour, will I get singled out for extra screening, or will I get to skip the screening and get a big bag of cash to take with me?
Political Correctness has turned the world upside down. The very people who have historically done the most damage to the country (politicians, bureaucrats, and radical Muslims) are the least likely to be screened at airports.
The Islam-o-nut at Ft. Hood was active duty, and an “Officer and a Gentleman” to boot.
Hmmm…. Nobility in the Middle Ages were often exempt from Laws they enforced on the Peasents…
Excellent point. There are numerous ways to “profile”, one of which is to “profile OUT” people that should not be risks:
- military and civilians with security clearances above “xxxx” with the past “n” years
- anyone who as been through a FBI criminal background check within the past “n” years
- Airline frequent travlers with over “n” miles traveled
- etc
this would allow the TSA to apply their “expertise” to a much, much smaller universe — reducing congestion, speeding the process, reducing staff and costs (oops, can’t reduce staff, sorry)
Did you forget the Homeland Security memo that listed these same people as “possible future homegrown terrorist threats?”
They would be the first listed on a no fly list, followed by the greys, the handicapped, children under the age of 10, THEN “Middle Eastern and Indonesian types.”
No system is perfect but had the military not been cowed into political correctness and done its job properly the nutjob would have been drummed out years ago if he even managed to get in.
Wise you are, johnsteele.
I never show my retired I.D. anymore. Guaranteed to get you special treatment from the TSA.
They only want to ‘random’ frisk persons that are least likely to hassle them. That means elderly, little kids, and military.
Submit, Ye small people.
that’s what I expect is happening. Wouldn’t want anyone to cause a scene that could fight the “check” so pick on those who can’t fight.
I used to fly “Clear”, having undergone a biometric process and TSA background check. They had a private contractor, “Clear”, running this. I paid for two years membership in advance, and then whaddaya know: they went bankrupt. They’re back now, but Clear is no longer in my area. I still have my card, and should be allowed to present it, get my retina scanned and get on the darn plane!
The Obama administration tells us that everyone must be screened because it’s against our values to profile. Yet, these very people have now profiled themselves out of the screening process. So the people who have done the most harm to America have exempted themselves from the degrading screening process they came up with for everyone else. Next, they will “profile out” Muslims in burqas. Before long political correctness will determine that only white, Christian males can be singled out for enhanced screening.
so says the Hamas-lover
Not even I would have the heart to force a TSA drone to pat down janet napolitano. There must be a machine for that.
The way I understand it is that VIP/elites are exempt only if they have an armed escort. I’m assuming that’s because TSA believes that a muslim terrorist is incapable of obtaining an armed escort.
So if I manage to get an armed escort (as in my wife with her CCWP) I can get would whisked through sans groping? Ditto her traveling with me? Or can the guard have guns but not the guardee?
These government regulations can be so hard to figure out.
RSS thinks this is better.
Three year old gets the gift that keeps giving – a big time search.
’cause, as you know, three year olds love to blow sh_t up.
Hmmm… could explain somthing that has bugged me…
When I first retired, I grew my hair and goatee… hair was usually in a Ponytail long enough to reach between my shoulderblades… very very seldom got searched in the airport…
Then for one job cut my hair and shaved, and got searched MUCH more often… Heck, in one week I got searched by the same guy TWICE… LOL..
That would be inhumane to the TSA groper! /snark
My suggestion – don’t get searched when Barry White is the background music…
A little Dutch boy perhaps?
Ok, ok, I’ll behave, sorry…
Ixnay. Ixnay. Rogue and I got censored yesterday for innuendo.
you have that right, this so-called government of ours is out of control, top to bottom, whether it’s fiscal, racial, education, defense, security it is out of control. I doubt the country has ever had so many unscrupulous, unqualified, dishonest lying bastards working for the government as there is now, and yes the vast majority are liberal democraps.
So while they’re all exempt their flight crews must still submit?
Madness.
set jou vinger in die dijk
wanneer jy dit uit, dit stink
This! This is the very reason we have the poor conditions we finds ourselves in today. The politicians do not have to live in the same world we do. This is just another form of a specialized group/class of Americans just like race, gender, or handicap status. Enough with the class warfare already.
…and as for whether this is or isn’t a step in the right direction regarding profiling is a red herring. The whole porno booth/gropfest options are not the solution, period.
They are conditioning us to be sheep.
One word: revolt
It’s time. We have to be willing to go to jail.
The “have” vs the “have not”. The ruling class vs the country class.
That miserable Chicago Thug, Obama the Privileged, now has a definitive legacy. He has successfully divided our great country. Ba$tard.
These VIP’s have been proven to be non-risks and it is totally acceptable that they be exempted from the scrutiny. It is called “profiling”. Gee, where have I heard that word before?? If they have been deemed safe, how many more people could get exempted if common sense prevailed?? We need to allow some kind of exemptions for those who pass certain criteria. And profile the rest…racially and psychologically. Talk to them, question them…know which ones have one-way tickets. Know which ones have no luggage. There are so many things that can be done. And alot cheaper too!! There is more to this whole thing than meets the eye. Watch for it.
It is, how do you think they created ‘Affirmative Action’? There wouldn’t be an affirmative action if it wasn’t for profiling.
You all just don’t understand…these people are exalted…you don’t touch the junk of the exalted…..can’t do it.
One good thing, if I’m in the doghouse with the wife, I can always cruise Logan Airport for some TSA conjugaling.
TSA Agent #1: “Do you want the scanner or the pat-down?”
Me: “I’ll take the pat-down.”
TSA Agent #2: “Is that a Maglite, or are you just happy to see me?”
Me: “No and no!”
*In any case, we need to keep the heat on, and get them to start looking for suspicious people with ill intent first, then search them thoroughly; No child should go through a naked scanner or a full body pat-down; No way!
Yes, you see being in control of a giant airliner doesn’t have the possibility for mass mayhem the way accidentally carrying a fingernail clipper on board would.
I’ve always thought it ironic that I show them my retired military ID, and have (used to have, I guess) a Top Secret clearance and 2 more above that, that I still have to get the grope, because I have a hip transplant. I know it is a waste of time for them, and i know there are many like situated travelers. If they just profiled *out* the obvious, wouldn’t that be a start?
It would if this was actually about real security, but since it isn’t ….
The self-discribed great ones that are exempt from this are are not a danger to the country because they ride on planes, they are a danger to the country because they are in charge of it right now. Lets clean out the whole lot of them in 2012.
I believe all gov’t officials who are enforcing/supporting these pat downs should be required to submit to them. If you order it then you should be subject to it.
Like for Congress and the laws it passes. Last I heard there was no such thing as royalty in this country, but it seems some of these folks think they are.
Let them eat cake.
Exactly.
John Boehner is one more establishment Republican. It was inevitable that he would simply scamper by the security screening and leave the little people to go through the humiliating search. Boehner is, in significant measure, the flip side of Pelosi. He sees himself as part of a privileged few who do not have to do the ordinary grubby things that the rest of us have to do. Heck, he is starting to remind me alot of Chris Dodd already. Skipping screenings is terrible symbolism. Boehner is telling the world: “I am a big shot Washington, D.C. insider. Like Tom Daschle, I don’t have to do the same things that you grubby little people from outside the beltway have to do”. Boehner should join Bob Dole, Jim Baker and all the other establishment Republicans on the sidelines.
They can do more damage in their offices than in the cockpit of a hijacked airplane, so why screen them at the airport? They should be checked for potentially harmful thoughts before reporting for work.
Michaelle:
Please investigate LVARS Standoff Detection Raman Spectrometer For Detection of Improvised Explosive Devices. This technology was offered to DHS/TSA by a DOD organization about two years ago and refused. It is non-intrusive and effectively detects PETN and other explosives, hidden in body-cavities or stowed secretly. This technology far out-performs the naked scanners and doe not assault a person dignity or rights.
Hangfire #19: “and an “Officer and a Gentleman” to boot.”
Only by act of congress.
Besides, of the hundreds of thousands of people that have had Secret and/or Top Secret clearances, you find one muslim fanatic.
That is the key point here: muslims are the threat.
Heck, there are countless cases of people using their car to run over people, so, let’s take everyone’s car away from them.
We give First Class passengers steel knives and steel forks when serving them dinner, but yet, you can’t bring a sippy cup full of water through a TSA East-German-like checkpoint.
Insanity.
This whole process today is insane, absolutely insane.
When we close our eyes to the true threat (islam), then we are blind to the threat and weaken ourselves and make us more vulnerable.
Rumor has it that TSA employees opted out of having to grope Nappy and that’s why she doesn’t have to be felt up. Rumor too good to check.
Of course and it is easy to discriminate…anyone who has the free, unlimited, go to the front of any line, health care card automatically is exempt from humiliation. The rest of us….well who cares…..
Neal Boortz reported on this story the other day.
However, I am not sure that it beats the story that they found a fully loaded gun clip that fell on the floor (of the plane or ramp, I do not remember) – someone please tell me how it got there?
What I want to know is: do airport security personnel have to check eachother? What is to stop a TSA employee or other airport personnel from going on a rampage or sabotaging an aircraft? Just sayin’…sometimes people crack
Errah
I recently saw Fmr. Sen. Larry Craig and he said “When in Logan for a good time I recommend TSO Bob Smith at Gates B1-30 M-F 8:00-5:00 weekdays. Great Dutch Rudder!”
Saw this on a blog: (the author’s mis-spellings)
Not a big secret Janet isn’t into men. If you know what I mean. Comfortable shoes. Liked ‘Fried Green Tomatoes’. She and Janet Reno would love to road trip.
Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge.
She would almost certainly volunteer for the full grope down action, since I doubt she attracts too many young women.
If you know what I mean.
For similar reasons Barney Frank would not take an exemption from being closely examined by some unfortunate TSA agent.
Fact is these new proceedures have very little to do with security, they are “sold” that way to the less thoughtful citizens in order to move the real agenda forward. This administration is intent upon destroying the American way of life and the plan is to destroy the travel industry along with Banking, Manufacturing, Health Care, etc. OBambi & company are America’s enemies, and they are proceeding merrily along with our destruction while some of us simply comment, joke and laugh while others ignore it all. We are in trouble on all fronts.
Opt out of the scan, be labelled by the Obamanation as a domestic extremist.
Someday, a government search of the Malkin servers will round up a whole list of IP addresses of domestic extremists. Except Chaps. He’ll probably be awarded the Order of Alinksy.
Driving to DFW today.
Disney vacation in June, perfect weather in SoCal, little cool in the morning, just right in the afternoon. Our two year old did not like having to walk barefoot through the metal detectors.
As if he were a potential jihadi…
I don’t know if I accept this 100% or not, but it is interesting…
Is the TSA testicle twisting Obama’s way of paying back Whitey for centuries of colonial abuse?
Invading Pakistan is a core aspect of re-acquiring our flight freedom.
Which is why it won’t happen, of course.
Errah, That’s why I’m taking Madame Secretary’s advice and driving to Hawaii. Does anyone know what the tolls are?
Errah
I suspect that there won’t be anyone but Chappy to collect up. All of the rest of us would have been scouped up and sent to FEMA Re-edjumakation Camps via Federal and State Firearms registry databases.
We need to somehow get Obama, Biden, Pelosi, Reid, Frank, J-Nap, and a whole bunch of others on the same plane.
Operated by Ethiopian Airlines.
With a devout Muslim in the cockpit.
John Boehner insisted on getting an exemption from TSA searches. Barney Frank has not yet requested an exemption.
I’m wondering why the TSA agents are willing to go along with the grope policy. Why are they thinking this is ok? Is the fear of losing one’s job the reason? What else would they be willing to do if Janet told them to do it? Where is their line in the sand? What line will they not cross? When does it violate their sensibilities? What constitutes their moral compass?
In an infamous psychology experiment, volunteers were asked to deliver ever increasing (fake) voltages of electricity to (fake) subjects who would scream and writhe and beg the volunteer to stop – and it turns out people will do almost anything you ask no matter how bad. The experiment was a “landmark” in some sense, and every US University now has a Human Subjects Committee that vets experiments to keep volunteers from going through the trauma some of them experienced. But it was an eye-opener in a post-WWII world where people thought you had to be evil to do evil things.
The TSA agents will in large part do anything the government asks – which is why We The People need to keep our government responsible to our wishes.
Just a suggestion when about to get groped by a TSA Moron.
Before they touch you ask them if they have washed their hands and put on a clean pair of gloves. If the answer is no demand they wash their hands and put on new gloves. If they say they used that hand sanitizer ask how many people they have touched since using it. If the answer is greater than 2 demand they wash their hands and put on new gloves. This is standard SOP in hospitals and doctors offices. No reason for you to be subjected to scabies or other nasties because TSA is not following routine universal precautions. It is not unreasonable to request that TSA not infect you with god knows what. This small request taken to its logical conclusion would bring air travel to a stand still.
What gets me is that TSA will not use profiling when it comes to those of middle eastern decent even though the majority of terrorists attacks have come from those of Middle Eastern decent (I say most as the last one was from a guy from African decent); yet they use profiling to decide that people with prosthetics need to be checked.
I have heard that here at Seattle the backscatter x-ray machines are not being used today (though they have been in use up until today). I have many a friedn flying out today that called me and told me that they were through security in about 10 to 15 minutes and that not one person was “selected” for any full body scans at all, hence no extra evassive pat downs either.
These machines are potentially very dangerous. Here’s a link to an article by a Biochemist working in Biophysics. He has several excellent links to authorities from UCSF and Johns Hopkins among others. Here’s a sample:
more…
Doesn’t sound like anyone should be in these machines. Which means we should all demand to be groped.
(Honolulu uses a different kind of scanner – not sure of it’s effects.)
Interesting hearing Lars Larson defend these procedures. I usually listen to him rather than Hannity. But he must be deadly afraid of flying. He calls TSA employees “professionals” and says we should use any technology to make us safer, but is only concerned about flying. So for security he is willing to deny he even has civil rights. He says he will also use the machines, but some of us don’t have that choice. We have no machines. Me, I have had thyroid cancer, so I am personally leery of radiation, even without a thyroid.
My opinion: I have never been afraid to fly. I was in the air when the towers were attacked. I was back in the air two days later flying back to Cary. I have felt safe flying for the past 9 years. So these precautions DO NOT make me feel safer.
I see these methods as pure theater and over-reaction. It gives the elusion of safety without providing any. It make works with Lars, but not me. Better in my opinion would be dogs trained to sniff out metal and explosives. They can be used before any security bottleneck develops in the airport. Also better is intelligence, both proactive and reactive. These exact same methods should be used on the borders.
But people who claim to be rugged individualist like Larson really are not. They will jump to government theater every time. Then they will go into denial about what really is happening.
Soon TSA will unionize. Then the union thugs will be controlling the flying through airports. Get on a list (like Fox News Analyst) and get groped or visit the poorly set up machine. This is what Chicago Fascism is all about.
good article, tks.
An idea from the peanut gallery: Since all the airline bomb attacks over the last 30 years have come from MUSLIMS flying on planes who came from middle east countries, instead of subjecting grandma and little Jimmy to this airport BS, let’s not allow any muslims from entering the U.S., and deport any non citizen muslims back to the s**thole from whence the came. Now we can go back to flying across our nation like people living in the 21st century, and let those who want to live in the 12th century to kill each other off over percieved slights and arcane orthodoxy.
Whats so funny is we’ve told the terrorists how to beat the machine.
TSA:Hey Achmed machine or pat down?
Achmed:Machine plz!
2hrs later in mid flight “KABOOM”
Have you just about had it with our wonderful politburo passing out rules which apply to everyone EXCEPT themselves. They are exempt from insider trading rules, they are exempt from TSA grope and tickle rules, they are exempt from Social security retirement rules, and medicare/obamacare medical rules. And we used to snicker at how the Russian Politburo were the only ones who were allowed to shop in the stores with goods in them, and had cars and dachas. Sounds like Nancy and Charlie to me!
Lets face it- these “high” official people are all total azzholes with sh/t for brains. Would you want to touch them? Not me.
How does one cleanse oneself after patting down Nancy Pelosi or Charlie Rangel ? Draino and steel wool or does it require self immolation? And don’t forget while patting down these congressmen (LOL) they are stealing your wallet and watch.
Lets show a little mercy for the TSA screeners.