Did You Know...

   

Mayor Bloomberg’s Spanish Snow Address Translated for Our English Speaking Audience

Share
By Doug Powers  •  December 28, 2010 04:21 PM

**Written by Doug Powers

Today, New York City Mayor Bloomberg delivered a message in Spanish concerning the blizzard that has crippled much of the eastern US.

Click the pic to hear the announcement:

null

If you don’t speak Spanish, here’s a translation of the Mayor’s update:

*****
My fellow Spanish-speaking New Yorkers. You may have noticed a large amount of a white substance that has been accumulating outside for some time now. I want to reassure anybody who might fear for his or her safety that the substance is not salt. I repeat, it is not salt. I’ve also heard claims that the substance might be sugar. Thankfully, this is not true. Our Health Department has tested the substance and assures me that it is indeed snow.

Now, the bad news. It’s a fact that global warming is making snowstorms worse. And, as I’ve said before, global warming is comparable to terrorism. Ergo, our city has suffered a terrorist attack of sorts. But at least it’s not salt.

Additionally, the Health Department has asked me to remind everyone of the proper technique for shoveling snow — 1) Don’t smoke; 2) lift with your legs; 3) seriously, don’t even think about smoking 4) recognize and understand that, yes, the snow is all white and in no way a fair representation of our great city, but it is only snow. Definitely not salt! Thank you for your attention. As-Salamu Alaykum.

*****
Update: The speaking Spanish thing doesn’t seem to be working. New Yorkers are starting to ask themselves how effectively Team Bloomie would respond to a real crisis if they’re getting their asses kicked by a snowstorm.

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe

blog comments powered by Disqus

Heir apparent to Al Gore proves he’s totally up to the challenge

March 22, 2015 09:29 AM by Doug Powers

pharrell

“Without Pharrell our planet would not survive.”

Maybe the EPA will fulfill FOIA requests after they’re done trying to regulate your grill emissions

March 13, 2015 12:40 PM by Doug Powers

epa

The spatula cops are sniffing around your BBQ

Guess what might be to blame for the rise of ISIS

March 4, 2015 09:30 PM by Doug Powers

jihadi

Hint: Sounds like “noble swarming” or “climb that range”

Starbucks working diligently to protect the planet from threat posed by whipped cream

February 24, 2015 10:45 AM by Doug Powers

whipped

Whole latte climate concern

Great Lakes’ failure to cooperate with Al Gore’s doomsday alarmism a sure sign of climate change, says Bill Nye

February 19, 2015 08:32 PM by Doug Powers

goreangry

Foiled again


Categories: Al Gore, Enviro-nitwits, global warming

Follow me on Twitter Follow me on Facebook