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Hallmark Launches Line of Sympathy Cards for the Unemployed

By Doug Powers  •  September 27, 2011 07:56 PM

**Written by Doug Powers

This was inevitable, I suppose, but I’m not sure how I’d feel if I got one of these in the mail:

Rather than just getting a Hallmark greeting card on a birthday or any old generic calendar holiday, the company is aiming to bring some encouragement to the masses of unemployed right when they need it most.

The greeting card giant created a line of sympathy cards that targets people who recently lost their jobs.

With the national unemployment rate staying steady at nine per cent, the company thought there was an untapped audience.

‘People in times of need with always need to connect,’ said Hallmark’s creative director Derek McCracken to National Public Radio’s All Things Considered.

‘When the consumers have asked us for a way to connect in those difficult situations, we try to respond in an authentic way and we think that what the greeting card does is offer a bridge,’ Mr McCracken continued.

Eight such cards are available on the company’s website, ranging in their level of seriousness and humour.

One says ‘don’t think about it as losing your job. Think about it as a time-out between stupid bosses’.

Part of me thinks that Hallmark encouraging people to send their family and friends “too bad you lost your job” cards is just a way to subsequently boost sales of their “Sorry I called you a %#*&%@*#” series.

I haven’t checked yet to see if they’re selling a line of job loss cards with the president on the front, but I’ll bet these would be big sellers:

Times are real tough
But you’ll just have to chill
This will all be over
When they pass the jobs bill

Call or Tweet your member of Congress today!

This morning I learned
When my staff brought the mail out
That the company you worked for
Didn’t qualify for a bailout

My sympathies

You’re probably wondering
While in the job fair pavilion
How your employer Solyndra
Squandered $500 million

Good luck green-job hunting!

They could sell this card in the “we’re proud of you” category with Nancy Pelosi’s picture on the front:

You don’t realize it now
Due to your sudden autonomy
But your lack of a job
Is stimulating the economy

Congratulations on your recent layoff!

WTHR news video by way of Mediaite:

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe

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