Did You Know...

   

More deep thoughts from contemporary beat philosopher John Kerry

Share
By Doug Powers  •  March 20, 2013 08:54 PM

**Written by Doug Powers

The confirmation of John Kerry brought the United States — nay the world — the most philosophical secretary of state since Henry Kissinger said something I couldn’t quite understand but that sounded pretty heavy.

Last month, Kerry gave the world this pearl: “There is no pause button on the future” (somebody’s obviously never heard of Ambien). Earlier this week Kerry had some fresh wisdom to impart:

Describing himself as “a child of the ocean,” Secretary of State John Kerry warned that the “fragile ecosystem” is threatened by climate change.

“We call this beautiful planet that we are privileged to inhabit for a short period of time — we call it Earth, but it could well have been called Ocean because three-quarters of it is ocean,” Kerry told a gathering at the National Geographic Society in Washington on Monday.

Maybe we’d call the world “Ocean” if humans were called “Salmon,” but that’s not the way it worked out, Mr. Climate.

Has the self-proclaimed “child of the ocean” paid the Treasury yet for being a child of delinquent luxury yacht taxes?

Unreliable sources tell me our newest philosopher of state was prepared to ask the NGC gathering, “Why do they call it Ovaltine? The mug is round; the jar is round… they should call it Roundtine.” But an eagle-eyed aide removed the line, possibly sparing Kerry an embarrassing plagiarism accusation.

(h/t Weasel Zippers)

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe

blog comments powered by Disqus
Posted in: John Kerry

As a show of unprecedented openness, the State Dept. can release all Hillary-related emails by 2091

June 7, 2016 09:11 AM by Doug Powers

transparency

Funny stuff

Transparency, Iran deal-style! Mysterious video editing gremlin roaming halls at the State Dept.

June 1, 2016 09:04 PM by Doug Powers

transparency

Only thing “transparent” is the dishonesty

John Kerry should tell the White House about his ‘borderless world’ prediction

May 8, 2016 11:08 PM by Doug Powers

kerryfootball

Whatever

Perfect: John Kerry opposes offshore tax havens the same way he leads by example on climate change

April 26, 2016 09:21 AM by Doug Powers

kerry9

Do as he says, not as he does!

John Kerry will LOVE Bono’s idea: What needs to be deployed against ISIS is … comedy

April 13, 2016 07:59 AM by Doug Powers

bono

With or without you?


Categories: Hollyweird, Terrorist attacks, War, Al Qaeda, Barack Obama, Gitmo, John Kerry

Follow me on Twitter Follow me on Facebook