Caught a few minutes of Teresa Heinz Kerry on ABC’s The View earlier this morning. I’ve been tough on her and she has been as unhinged and unraveled as I said she would be during most of the campaign. But today she just seemed pitiful. She said she “winced” when her husband joked about marrying up during the last presidential debate. She complained about being “so tired” of traveling and said she brought her girlfriends along on the campaign trail to help her cope with “what I’m going through” (treating the most important election of our lifetime as a personal trauma).

Most revealing, Teresa confessed–were those tears in her eyes–that she has only talked to her husband about “once a week” and only gets to talk to him “for a few seconds.” She could barely muster up enough enthusiasm to make a pitch to undecided voters for her husband–even with helpful coaxing from lib handholders Star Jones and Barbara Walters.

Well, he’s “thoughtful,” Teresa murmured. He knows how to think about “complex” things. (Showing a brief spark of her old self, she couldn’t help noting that he sometimes thinks about things too much. That a girl.) And finally, she pulled out an old line uttered with weary, mock gung-ho spirit: If she were in a foxhole, she’d want to be with John Kerry.

As with all of her campaign appearances, the interview revealed much more about Teresa than it did about the candidate. Who cares about the race? She just wants it to be over and she wants her husband’s attention back. If she and we are lucky, they’ll be together again sipping hot chocolate and getting hot stone massages or whatever in Ketchum for Thanksgiving.

Hang in there, Mrs. Heinz. Two more weeks.

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