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Hey, maybe removing the word ‘alien’ from ICE lexicon for young illegals will solve the influx problem

By Doug Powers  •  July 3, 2014 09:16 PM

**Written by Doug Powers

Progressive Crisis Management 101: Simply change or eliminate an undesirable-but-accurate description what’s going, and problem solved!

Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) personnel have been directed to no longer refer to illegal immigrant children crossing the border alone as “UACs” (unaccompanied alien children).

Instead these individuals are to be referred to as “unaccompanied children” in official correspondence, according to an internal ICE email obtained by the Center for Immigration Studies and shared with Breitbart News.

“This was briefed earlier today during he (sic) command and staff meeting,” an email sent to ICE personnel reads. “It has been requested that in correspondence regarding unaccompanied children, They (sic) not be referred to as UACs. The term UAC should not be used in official correspondence.”

The email, with the subject line “UACs,” continues, “The appropriate messaging on documents should be using the term : unaccompanied children all lower case. (Unless capitalizing would be grammatically correct).”

Full story here.

NBC’s already tried to help in the re-labeling effort by referring to the illegals as — get this — “#RefugeeRiders.”

If that doesn’t solve the problem, the “unaccompanied alien children” will then be referred to as “legal American citizens” according to documents I obtained from sources at “The Department of What We All Know They’re Gonna Try to Do Next.”

President Obama is headed down to Texas soon to take matters into his own hands. And by “matters” I mean “fundraisers,” of course:

Jay Carney’s more than capable replacement behind the Podium of Untruth in the press briefing room explained it this way:

But despite being battered on all sides on the issue, a White House spokesman said Thursday that the president had no intention of visiting the border for a firsthand look at the scene of what he has called a humanitarian crisis.

“The reason that some people are suggesting the president should go to border when he’s in Texas is because they’d rather play politics than actually trying to address some of these challenges,” Josh Earnest, the White House spokesman, said Thursday.

In other words, “don’t play politics with the president while he’s headlining DNC fundraisers!”

When does a president not visit the site of what the White House has referred to as a “humanitarian crisis” in his own country? When it would be a damaging photo op. But if the administration can figure out a way to pin it all on global warming, Obama, accompanied by Bill Nye the Science Guy, will be there within hours.

**Written by Doug Powers

Twitter @ThePowersThatBe

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